GOOGLIES & CHINAMEN
An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 99
March 2011
Caption Competition
Andrew Strauss: Did you all hear that we won the Ashes?
Ricky Ponting: But we are the World Champions.
Andrew Strauss: We also are the World 20/20 champions.
M.S. Dhoni: Who cares? This is the big one.
Shahid Afridi: I bet we bowl more no balls than the rest of you put together.
Darren Sammy: Now lets see there are eight major nations and six minnows in this competition, aren’t there?
Graeme Smith: I think you’ll find its seven and seven, Darren.
Kumar Sangakkara: Who farted?
Out and About with the Professor
The Professor recalls being out and inside many years ago
The reference, in a previous Googlies, by the Great Jack Morgan to playing cricket in Wormwood Scrubs prison reminded me of the events. Jack obviously played in some of the matches as did some other Googlies readers.
The tale might stand re-telling.
For most of his working life my father was a librarian. He spent most of his time at Hammersmith library but did spells at other local libraries, effectively incorporating them into the central service. Some time in the 1960s he was asked to go to Wormwood Scrubs prison to do something similar – convert a room full of books into a modern library. Inevitably, over time, conversation with the prison officials touched on cricket and eventually a Shepherds Bush Cricket Club side was raised to play (an away match) at the prison.
The cricket was played in the prison yard with the 20 foot (or so) prison wall as the back drop at one end. The surface was tarmac and the stumps stood in little wooden blocks. Tennis balls were used but, as we all know, they have insufficient weight to bowl, throw or hit very far and so the prisoners had devised a means of injecting the balls with water (don’t ask me how) so that they could be bowled at speed and, occasionally, hit a good distance. The water also made them wobble in the air which gave batting an extra frisson. We had a decent side but my memory is that the inmates’ local knowledge was a decisive factor. In fact I have two clear recollections: one was that one of our team, K.V. Jones (he of Middlesex fame) did hit the ball clean over the wall – a considerable strike which led to endless “jokes” about getting the ball back – and the other about the “spectators”.
Our matches (in the event there were several) were against “D Wing” (I think) or whatever was the designation for the inmates who had committed the most serious offences. To play, and even to watch the games was a considerable “privilege”. Prior to the start of play they all marched out with a chair and sat round the yard – a sort of impenetrable barrier of muscle and menace. At least it was impenetrable when we hit the ball. A delicate little leg glace would come rocketing back to the fielder from some huge boots; but when they batted those same boots would open and then clamp shut as we ran up to field the ball. In short, the spectators were both very partisan and absolutely terrifying. I remember on several occasions gazing at a scarred and battered face saying the equivalent of “please sir can I have my ball back”.
Still it was good fun and very interesting and the visits gave me (mercifully) my only insight into life in prison. I often think of it when right-wing commentators declare that being in prison is like being at a holiday camp. Either they have never been inside one or they have taken some very strange vacations.
The series of matches came to an end when the spy George Blake escaped in 1966; I don’t think he ever played, but his escape meant that all privileges were withdrawn and the matches were never revived.
Other Googlies readers must have examples of cricket in odd places to recount.
World Cup Matters
We are a week into the World Cup and it seems appropriate to select a team of the competition so far. This is based on outstanding performances so far rather than trying to pick a particularly balanced side. But then who picks balanced sides anyway?
Sehwag
Strauss
Sangakkara
Tendulkar
Jayawardene
De Villiers
Afridi
Botha
Bresnan
Khan
Steyn
Ten Doeschate must consider himself pretty unlucky not to make this side which is pretty much populated by big names. However, there are some superstars who are yet to perform, amongst whom are: Vettori, Taylor, Pieterson, Ponting, Swann and Chanderpaul.
Carlin Matters
Paddy Carlin sent me the following notes
Reading the Great Jack Morgan’s comprehensive review of the Minor Counties Championship matches brought home to me the realisation that the Home Counties Premier League is more than probably the strongest of the Southern ECB Leagues. In the two matches Jack covered there were no fewer than thirteen regular HCPL players mentioned. They were: Hodnett, McLean, Mordt, Roberts, Crowe, Naylor, Stanway, Cherry, Cranfield, Thompson, Sher, Sawyer, Miller and Payne. In addition to this group one could addregular performers in the HCPL such as Keegan, Dutch, Berg, Burger, Toor and Harrison. My own club, WGCCC, can field eleven current Hertfordshire players, although admittedly Herts is not the strongest Minor County. These include three ex county players- Hewitt, Laraman and Walker and two MCC Young Cricketers/Middlesex II players in Blacktopp and Southgate.
Charlie Puckett’s view that the Middlesex League is stronger is questionable. On my travels I have been told that there are only two or three good sides in that league and the fact that Ealing wins it each year says it all. I don’t think that they could repeat that feat in the HCPL.
There are seven or eight good sides in the HCPL-Henley, WGC, Banbury, High Wycombe, Radlett, Oxford and Tring Park- that would hold their own in the Middlesex League. I doubt whether there are seven Middlesex sides that could do that in the HCPL.
The point about HCPL sides not doing so well in the National Cups is mainly due to the fact that Minor Counties cricket is now played on Sundays which rules out a lot of player availability. The clubs in Middlesex, Kent, Essex and Surrey suffer far less.
Until we have a truly South-East League we will never know who are the strongest but in the meantime I would like to think that Ealing might fancy a season in the HCPL instead of traipsing around the North Circular for easy matches.
Middlesex Matters
The Great Jack Morgan has been keeping an eye on staff developments at Radlett
Ollie Rayner is joining Middlesex on loan until mid-May. I do not think that Ollie is a world-beater, but I have no objection to this deal (he had a decent season last year)... I'm just wondering why. We need an off-spinner for the whole season, so why have we got one for a few weeks only? Obviously, because our new star spinner is arriving in mid-May! However, I have no clue as to who it might be... someone from the IPL? But we cannot accommodate another foreigner (unless he is a Kolpak), otherwise IEO'B would not be looking for another county.
Steve Crook (a 27 year old Aussie with a British passport, previously with Lancs and Northants) has joined Middx on a one year deal, although this will be reviewed at the end of April. He is a pace bowling allrounder and they seem to want him as cover for Bergy, about whose fitness there seem to be lingering doubts, so this is a sensible move. I have seen him play and I thought he had some potential, particularly as a hard hitting batter (career average 31.5), but his bowling was not so encouraging as an average of 48 confirms.
Middlesex have signed Ryan McLaren (ex-Kent and SA) for the T20.
Oddities Matters
I wrote the following to the Great jack Morgan:
I noted that The Kenyans had seven in their side with their names beginning with O.
It is starting to seem odd that Sehwag and Gayle both have two triple centuries in tests whilst Tendulkar and Ponting haven’t scored one. The South Africans haven’t got one between them and England’s last was Edrich, I think.
Then there are the cases of Dalrymple and Greig I both scoring 250 plus in championship matches at the Oval (apparently now the Kia Oval rather than the Brit Oval) but otherwise scoring few first class hundreds. Has Dalrymple retired or has he been snapped up by a trophy chasing county?
He responded
The Oval is the explanation for the big scores by I Greig and J Dalrymple. There have been some exceptionally benign tracks there over the years and this is particularly true in the case of Greig, whose 291 was made in the notorious borefest against Lancs in 1990, when N Fairbrother made 366. This was (if memory serves) the first ever four day county match at the Oval and the groundsman (like many others) did not want to produce a track that did not go the distance and so he produced one on which it was impossible to get out... unless you were Graham Clinton! Other early four dayers produced similar outcomes, but this was possibly the worst of the lot. I have not heard that Jamie has retired, but I do not think he has been snapped up either: I heard that he wants to go back to the Oval as he thinks he might get a few runs! Incidentally Gooch got 333 at Lords against the Indians.
Tennis Matters
Well sort of… anyway it’s a first
The Great Jack Morgan wrote to me last month saying that he had felt obligated to write in to the Guardian to complain that their article was incorrect in describing Andy Murray’s draw in the Australian Open was an easy one. This month he sent me this:
“BBC2 had the Andy Murray/ David Ferrar Australian Open semi-final on live this morning, which made for an excellent four hours of live sport on a Friday morning for us layabouts with nothing better to do. Andy duly won in four sets and he has done brilliantly to reach the final, but I think he will have to improve on this slightly patchy performance in order to beat Novak Djokovic in the final. I still think I was right to complain that there was nothing lucky about Murray's draw, but as it happened, he did not have to play any of the four formidable opponents that lay in wait for him because Del Potro lost in round 3, Soderling lost in round 4, Nadal lost in the quarters (to Ferrar) and Federer lost in the semis (to Djokovic).”
How does the ECB spend all that money?
The Great Jack Morgan knows
What a waste of money dept: L Plunkett is travelling all the way from WI to Oz to cover for one match, ODI7 (because he will not arrive in time for ODI6), in a series that has already been lost! They already have Jimmy, Woakesy, Finny, Yardy, Treddy, Wrighty, Colly and Trotty to choose from: this is crazy! S Mahmood is actually in Australia, so it shows how far out of favour he has fallen as they prefer to fly in Plunketty from the Caribbean. Liam is supposed to be covering for Shahzad and Tremlett, though some reports declared that there was little wrong with Tremmers... but he is flying home anyway, knackered, I suppose, or is he desperately trying to ensure his fitness for the WC (for which he has not been selected)?
Rangers Matters
Jim Revier is finding it hard to cope with the nomenclature of the Rangers players. He wrote to the Great Jack Morgan:
“Have we ever previously fielded players with names like: Clint, Fitz, Adel, Heidar, Akos, Alejandro, Kaspars, Petter, Radek, Hogan, Ishmael, Bruno, Georgios and Pascal in our line up? Bit different to Mike, Stan, Gerry, Roger and Ian.”
Long hand Matters
Paddy Carlin sends his missives to me as long hand drafts and I previously typed Jade Dernbach as top material whereas Paddy had actually meant tap material! He joins Steve Finn in the seven an over club.
In his latest note Paddy informed me that he was interested in joining the Googlies 100 lunch. I emailed the Professor to check that he had him on the list. He replied:
“Yes. He is on the list. It was all very straightforward. I wrote (a letter with stamp, etc) to Paddy to invite him. Then I remembered that he and his wife were off to Oz to stay with some mutual friends. So I e-mailed the Aussies (Mike MacLagan - also a Googlies reader) with the invite, in case they had already left. Mac picked up the note and sent it to Paddy's wife (they have a pc in the house, he just refuses to use it).She printed it off and put it in front of Paddy who was watching the rugby international at the time and couldn't be disturbed. She then e-mailed me to say she had done this. When the match ended, he 'phoned. Easy!”
Trevor Bailey
The Professor forwarded me the following notes he received from Peter Webster
Loved him (next to FST).A bad loser. 1958 v Aussies 68 in 7 hours 38 minutes ( faced equivalent of 71 overs). You could have tuned in on the wireless then, heard the start of his innings, gone to bed, had a good nights sleep, got up, had breakfast, tuned in again, he would still be in, but still not reached his 50 ! In the day England scored 106 runs. Don’t you just love it. Proper cricket.
1953 Willy Watson Lords 4 hours to save us- I watched this on a tiny TV in a shop in Sheffield (no TV at home) sitting on rolled up carpets. I remember the shop manager tried to turn it off but was shouted down by angry non customers -he fled.
As a young boy I used to cycle to the local park to try to get a game in the evening adult matches. I would sometimes be able to field if teams were one short. I can hear now "there’s a kid looking for a game" But one day I was able to bat at no.11 and I batted to save the game ( I was doing this 50 years later). A voice said "we have a regular Trevor Bailey here" can you imagine my joy?
Wild fielding
The modern obsession with fielders throwing at the stumps because direct hits seem on many occasions to be out has various side effects which were particularly apparent in Australia this winter. I think that if there isn’t a direct hit there is less chance of there being a run out since the throw is considerably more difficult for the man at the stumps to collect and effect a run out. That is, of course, whether anybody bothers to go up to the stumps at all. Bowlers seem particularly reluctant to participate in this activity these days. The other impact is the growing number of overthrows and the inevitable chagrin of the suffering bowlers. On one occasion during the ODI series the Aussie batsmen took a quick single, the throw came in wildly and two overthrows were taken only for the next throw to be equally ineffectively handled and a further single added to the score.
The Great Jack Morgan responded to these notes:
“Wild fielding: I agree and it is not even necessary. A careful throw rather than a fast one will have more chance of hitting the sticks, will be more easily gathered and will only take a fraction of a second longer to arrive.”
Glamorgan Matters
The Great Jack Morgan’s new found fascination with all things Glamorgan continues
Glamorgan have appointed Matthew Mott from NSW as their new coach. My theory is that his predecessor had had his initials marked on absolutely everything in sight and so Glam had to look for someone who would save them a few bob by not having to replace everything with new stuff. Glamorgan have re-signed their former batsman and off-spinner, Mike O'Shea, whom they released after the 2009 season. He was once linked with Middx and was seen getting runs and wickets at Radlett last season for Glos 2s. Presumably Matthew Mott knows him well and insisted he be re-signed! Or has he got the same initials as one of those who has left?
Old Danes Matters-1
I took this photograph at last year’s Old Danes Gathering. The alumni are left to right: Bob Peach, Geoff Norris, Ron Bloome and Alvin Nienow. Geoff Norris will take over as President of Middlesex CCC from Peter Parfitt in April. Bob Peach will make you an offer you can’t refuse.
In this second photograph usual suspects Alvin and Helen Nienow, Jim Sharp and Bob Peach are joined by Nick Vincent (pink shirt) who flew in from Poland for the gathering.
ODI Matters
The Professor reminds us how it used to be
Did you see the discussion in the papers about the one day international played between England and Australia 40 years' ago? It was played, you will recall, because of the washout at Melbourne on the Illingworth tour of 1970/1. They played a 40 8-ball over match, i.e. the equivalent of a 53 over game. Neither side used all the overs nor was there too much evidence of specialist one-day performers. England opened with Boycott who scored 8 from 37 balls while that other well known switch-hitter, Bill Lawry, countered with 27 from 49. The reports suggested that no one took it at all seriously - it was dreamt up by Sir Donald Bradman as a money making venture ("he was good at that" according to Chapple.) The bulk of our runs were scored by Edrich (82 from 119) and theirs by Chapple (60 from 103). I had assumed that the game would have been played at a very different pace and indeed England scored at 3.6 per (6 ball) over – very poor by contemporary standards and well below the rate we have just seen in the defeat at Hobart. Connolly was the most expensive going at about a run a ball. One wonders what the fielding might have been like - Cowdrey batted at 6 and I don't recall Shuttleworth being too fleet of foot; my guess is that the chances of a shoulder dislocation from sliding were somewhat limited.
Snow said that he had Stackpole caught behind but the umpire called "over" before he had time to appeal. Can this be true? Either it was a very slow appeal or the quickest call of "over" ever. Or perhaps not - maybe some Googlies readers have evidence of quicker? Snow said that since it was just a bit of fun he wasn't too upset. Umm... I wonder if there is any footage of the match.
Incidentally, I heard some talk about Boycott at a dinner I went to just before Christmas. Apparently he had just made some money from auctioning the bat with which he made his 100th hundred. It was, so it was said, the twelfth such bat he had sold.
Keith Hardie Matters
I am pleased to report that I had a brief email from Keith Hardie saying that he, Barbara and their family were all Ok despite some scary moments after the recent earthquake in Christchurch, New Zealand
Googlies 100 Lunch
The Professor has organised a lunch to celebrate the reaching of the one hundredth edition of Googlies & Chinamen. It will take place in a box at Lord’s on Wednesday 27 April. This is the first day of Middlesex’ match against Surrey. There will be a charge of £40 to cover the cost of the box and food. If you would like to join the celebrants please email John Adams at [email protected] to reserve your place. There are limited spaces available so please do not delay. He will allocate places on a first come first served basis.
Old Danes Matters 2
The Fifth Old Danes Gathering will take place at Shepherds Bush CC on Friday 29 July from 2pm. It is open to all Old Danes, their friends and families. In previous years there have been about fifty Old Danes present during the afternoon and evening. Please advise me if you plan to attend so that I can add you to the list that I will be circulating.
Football Matters
Dr. Calvin Rickson, a scientist from Texas A&M University, has invented a bra that keeps women's breasts from jiggling, bouncing up and down, and prevents the nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in. He contacted Andrew Baker to make a presentation to his Ladies Team. After he had fitted out the ladies he was attacked by a large group of men led by Kelvin West who took him outside and kicked the shit out of him.
Googlies and Chinamen
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An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 99
March 2011
Caption Competition
Andrew Strauss: Did you all hear that we won the Ashes?
Ricky Ponting: But we are the World Champions.
Andrew Strauss: We also are the World 20/20 champions.
M.S. Dhoni: Who cares? This is the big one.
Shahid Afridi: I bet we bowl more no balls than the rest of you put together.
Darren Sammy: Now lets see there are eight major nations and six minnows in this competition, aren’t there?
Graeme Smith: I think you’ll find its seven and seven, Darren.
Kumar Sangakkara: Who farted?
Out and About with the Professor
The Professor recalls being out and inside many years ago
The reference, in a previous Googlies, by the Great Jack Morgan to playing cricket in Wormwood Scrubs prison reminded me of the events. Jack obviously played in some of the matches as did some other Googlies readers.
The tale might stand re-telling.
For most of his working life my father was a librarian. He spent most of his time at Hammersmith library but did spells at other local libraries, effectively incorporating them into the central service. Some time in the 1960s he was asked to go to Wormwood Scrubs prison to do something similar – convert a room full of books into a modern library. Inevitably, over time, conversation with the prison officials touched on cricket and eventually a Shepherds Bush Cricket Club side was raised to play (an away match) at the prison.
The cricket was played in the prison yard with the 20 foot (or so) prison wall as the back drop at one end. The surface was tarmac and the stumps stood in little wooden blocks. Tennis balls were used but, as we all know, they have insufficient weight to bowl, throw or hit very far and so the prisoners had devised a means of injecting the balls with water (don’t ask me how) so that they could be bowled at speed and, occasionally, hit a good distance. The water also made them wobble in the air which gave batting an extra frisson. We had a decent side but my memory is that the inmates’ local knowledge was a decisive factor. In fact I have two clear recollections: one was that one of our team, K.V. Jones (he of Middlesex fame) did hit the ball clean over the wall – a considerable strike which led to endless “jokes” about getting the ball back – and the other about the “spectators”.
Our matches (in the event there were several) were against “D Wing” (I think) or whatever was the designation for the inmates who had committed the most serious offences. To play, and even to watch the games was a considerable “privilege”. Prior to the start of play they all marched out with a chair and sat round the yard – a sort of impenetrable barrier of muscle and menace. At least it was impenetrable when we hit the ball. A delicate little leg glace would come rocketing back to the fielder from some huge boots; but when they batted those same boots would open and then clamp shut as we ran up to field the ball. In short, the spectators were both very partisan and absolutely terrifying. I remember on several occasions gazing at a scarred and battered face saying the equivalent of “please sir can I have my ball back”.
Still it was good fun and very interesting and the visits gave me (mercifully) my only insight into life in prison. I often think of it when right-wing commentators declare that being in prison is like being at a holiday camp. Either they have never been inside one or they have taken some very strange vacations.
The series of matches came to an end when the spy George Blake escaped in 1966; I don’t think he ever played, but his escape meant that all privileges were withdrawn and the matches were never revived.
Other Googlies readers must have examples of cricket in odd places to recount.
World Cup Matters
We are a week into the World Cup and it seems appropriate to select a team of the competition so far. This is based on outstanding performances so far rather than trying to pick a particularly balanced side. But then who picks balanced sides anyway?
Sehwag
Strauss
Sangakkara
Tendulkar
Jayawardene
De Villiers
Afridi
Botha
Bresnan
Khan
Steyn
Ten Doeschate must consider himself pretty unlucky not to make this side which is pretty much populated by big names. However, there are some superstars who are yet to perform, amongst whom are: Vettori, Taylor, Pieterson, Ponting, Swann and Chanderpaul.
Carlin Matters
Paddy Carlin sent me the following notes
Reading the Great Jack Morgan’s comprehensive review of the Minor Counties Championship matches brought home to me the realisation that the Home Counties Premier League is more than probably the strongest of the Southern ECB Leagues. In the two matches Jack covered there were no fewer than thirteen regular HCPL players mentioned. They were: Hodnett, McLean, Mordt, Roberts, Crowe, Naylor, Stanway, Cherry, Cranfield, Thompson, Sher, Sawyer, Miller and Payne. In addition to this group one could addregular performers in the HCPL such as Keegan, Dutch, Berg, Burger, Toor and Harrison. My own club, WGCCC, can field eleven current Hertfordshire players, although admittedly Herts is not the strongest Minor County. These include three ex county players- Hewitt, Laraman and Walker and two MCC Young Cricketers/Middlesex II players in Blacktopp and Southgate.
Charlie Puckett’s view that the Middlesex League is stronger is questionable. On my travels I have been told that there are only two or three good sides in that league and the fact that Ealing wins it each year says it all. I don’t think that they could repeat that feat in the HCPL.
There are seven or eight good sides in the HCPL-Henley, WGC, Banbury, High Wycombe, Radlett, Oxford and Tring Park- that would hold their own in the Middlesex League. I doubt whether there are seven Middlesex sides that could do that in the HCPL.
The point about HCPL sides not doing so well in the National Cups is mainly due to the fact that Minor Counties cricket is now played on Sundays which rules out a lot of player availability. The clubs in Middlesex, Kent, Essex and Surrey suffer far less.
Until we have a truly South-East League we will never know who are the strongest but in the meantime I would like to think that Ealing might fancy a season in the HCPL instead of traipsing around the North Circular for easy matches.
Middlesex Matters
The Great Jack Morgan has been keeping an eye on staff developments at Radlett
Ollie Rayner is joining Middlesex on loan until mid-May. I do not think that Ollie is a world-beater, but I have no objection to this deal (he had a decent season last year)... I'm just wondering why. We need an off-spinner for the whole season, so why have we got one for a few weeks only? Obviously, because our new star spinner is arriving in mid-May! However, I have no clue as to who it might be... someone from the IPL? But we cannot accommodate another foreigner (unless he is a Kolpak), otherwise IEO'B would not be looking for another county.
Steve Crook (a 27 year old Aussie with a British passport, previously with Lancs and Northants) has joined Middx on a one year deal, although this will be reviewed at the end of April. He is a pace bowling allrounder and they seem to want him as cover for Bergy, about whose fitness there seem to be lingering doubts, so this is a sensible move. I have seen him play and I thought he had some potential, particularly as a hard hitting batter (career average 31.5), but his bowling was not so encouraging as an average of 48 confirms.
Middlesex have signed Ryan McLaren (ex-Kent and SA) for the T20.
Oddities Matters
I wrote the following to the Great jack Morgan:
I noted that The Kenyans had seven in their side with their names beginning with O.
It is starting to seem odd that Sehwag and Gayle both have two triple centuries in tests whilst Tendulkar and Ponting haven’t scored one. The South Africans haven’t got one between them and England’s last was Edrich, I think.
Then there are the cases of Dalrymple and Greig I both scoring 250 plus in championship matches at the Oval (apparently now the Kia Oval rather than the Brit Oval) but otherwise scoring few first class hundreds. Has Dalrymple retired or has he been snapped up by a trophy chasing county?
He responded
The Oval is the explanation for the big scores by I Greig and J Dalrymple. There have been some exceptionally benign tracks there over the years and this is particularly true in the case of Greig, whose 291 was made in the notorious borefest against Lancs in 1990, when N Fairbrother made 366. This was (if memory serves) the first ever four day county match at the Oval and the groundsman (like many others) did not want to produce a track that did not go the distance and so he produced one on which it was impossible to get out... unless you were Graham Clinton! Other early four dayers produced similar outcomes, but this was possibly the worst of the lot. I have not heard that Jamie has retired, but I do not think he has been snapped up either: I heard that he wants to go back to the Oval as he thinks he might get a few runs! Incidentally Gooch got 333 at Lords against the Indians.
Tennis Matters
Well sort of… anyway it’s a first
The Great Jack Morgan wrote to me last month saying that he had felt obligated to write in to the Guardian to complain that their article was incorrect in describing Andy Murray’s draw in the Australian Open was an easy one. This month he sent me this:
“BBC2 had the Andy Murray/ David Ferrar Australian Open semi-final on live this morning, which made for an excellent four hours of live sport on a Friday morning for us layabouts with nothing better to do. Andy duly won in four sets and he has done brilliantly to reach the final, but I think he will have to improve on this slightly patchy performance in order to beat Novak Djokovic in the final. I still think I was right to complain that there was nothing lucky about Murray's draw, but as it happened, he did not have to play any of the four formidable opponents that lay in wait for him because Del Potro lost in round 3, Soderling lost in round 4, Nadal lost in the quarters (to Ferrar) and Federer lost in the semis (to Djokovic).”
How does the ECB spend all that money?
The Great Jack Morgan knows
What a waste of money dept: L Plunkett is travelling all the way from WI to Oz to cover for one match, ODI7 (because he will not arrive in time for ODI6), in a series that has already been lost! They already have Jimmy, Woakesy, Finny, Yardy, Treddy, Wrighty, Colly and Trotty to choose from: this is crazy! S Mahmood is actually in Australia, so it shows how far out of favour he has fallen as they prefer to fly in Plunketty from the Caribbean. Liam is supposed to be covering for Shahzad and Tremlett, though some reports declared that there was little wrong with Tremmers... but he is flying home anyway, knackered, I suppose, or is he desperately trying to ensure his fitness for the WC (for which he has not been selected)?
Rangers Matters
Jim Revier is finding it hard to cope with the nomenclature of the Rangers players. He wrote to the Great Jack Morgan:
“Have we ever previously fielded players with names like: Clint, Fitz, Adel, Heidar, Akos, Alejandro, Kaspars, Petter, Radek, Hogan, Ishmael, Bruno, Georgios and Pascal in our line up? Bit different to Mike, Stan, Gerry, Roger and Ian.”
Long hand Matters
Paddy Carlin sends his missives to me as long hand drafts and I previously typed Jade Dernbach as top material whereas Paddy had actually meant tap material! He joins Steve Finn in the seven an over club.
In his latest note Paddy informed me that he was interested in joining the Googlies 100 lunch. I emailed the Professor to check that he had him on the list. He replied:
“Yes. He is on the list. It was all very straightforward. I wrote (a letter with stamp, etc) to Paddy to invite him. Then I remembered that he and his wife were off to Oz to stay with some mutual friends. So I e-mailed the Aussies (Mike MacLagan - also a Googlies reader) with the invite, in case they had already left. Mac picked up the note and sent it to Paddy's wife (they have a pc in the house, he just refuses to use it).She printed it off and put it in front of Paddy who was watching the rugby international at the time and couldn't be disturbed. She then e-mailed me to say she had done this. When the match ended, he 'phoned. Easy!”
Trevor Bailey
The Professor forwarded me the following notes he received from Peter Webster
Loved him (next to FST).A bad loser. 1958 v Aussies 68 in 7 hours 38 minutes ( faced equivalent of 71 overs). You could have tuned in on the wireless then, heard the start of his innings, gone to bed, had a good nights sleep, got up, had breakfast, tuned in again, he would still be in, but still not reached his 50 ! In the day England scored 106 runs. Don’t you just love it. Proper cricket.
1953 Willy Watson Lords 4 hours to save us- I watched this on a tiny TV in a shop in Sheffield (no TV at home) sitting on rolled up carpets. I remember the shop manager tried to turn it off but was shouted down by angry non customers -he fled.
As a young boy I used to cycle to the local park to try to get a game in the evening adult matches. I would sometimes be able to field if teams were one short. I can hear now "there’s a kid looking for a game" But one day I was able to bat at no.11 and I batted to save the game ( I was doing this 50 years later). A voice said "we have a regular Trevor Bailey here" can you imagine my joy?
Wild fielding
The modern obsession with fielders throwing at the stumps because direct hits seem on many occasions to be out has various side effects which were particularly apparent in Australia this winter. I think that if there isn’t a direct hit there is less chance of there being a run out since the throw is considerably more difficult for the man at the stumps to collect and effect a run out. That is, of course, whether anybody bothers to go up to the stumps at all. Bowlers seem particularly reluctant to participate in this activity these days. The other impact is the growing number of overthrows and the inevitable chagrin of the suffering bowlers. On one occasion during the ODI series the Aussie batsmen took a quick single, the throw came in wildly and two overthrows were taken only for the next throw to be equally ineffectively handled and a further single added to the score.
The Great Jack Morgan responded to these notes:
“Wild fielding: I agree and it is not even necessary. A careful throw rather than a fast one will have more chance of hitting the sticks, will be more easily gathered and will only take a fraction of a second longer to arrive.”
Glamorgan Matters
The Great Jack Morgan’s new found fascination with all things Glamorgan continues
Glamorgan have appointed Matthew Mott from NSW as their new coach. My theory is that his predecessor had had his initials marked on absolutely everything in sight and so Glam had to look for someone who would save them a few bob by not having to replace everything with new stuff. Glamorgan have re-signed their former batsman and off-spinner, Mike O'Shea, whom they released after the 2009 season. He was once linked with Middx and was seen getting runs and wickets at Radlett last season for Glos 2s. Presumably Matthew Mott knows him well and insisted he be re-signed! Or has he got the same initials as one of those who has left?
Old Danes Matters-1
I took this photograph at last year’s Old Danes Gathering. The alumni are left to right: Bob Peach, Geoff Norris, Ron Bloome and Alvin Nienow. Geoff Norris will take over as President of Middlesex CCC from Peter Parfitt in April. Bob Peach will make you an offer you can’t refuse.
In this second photograph usual suspects Alvin and Helen Nienow, Jim Sharp and Bob Peach are joined by Nick Vincent (pink shirt) who flew in from Poland for the gathering.
ODI Matters
The Professor reminds us how it used to be
Did you see the discussion in the papers about the one day international played between England and Australia 40 years' ago? It was played, you will recall, because of the washout at Melbourne on the Illingworth tour of 1970/1. They played a 40 8-ball over match, i.e. the equivalent of a 53 over game. Neither side used all the overs nor was there too much evidence of specialist one-day performers. England opened with Boycott who scored 8 from 37 balls while that other well known switch-hitter, Bill Lawry, countered with 27 from 49. The reports suggested that no one took it at all seriously - it was dreamt up by Sir Donald Bradman as a money making venture ("he was good at that" according to Chapple.) The bulk of our runs were scored by Edrich (82 from 119) and theirs by Chapple (60 from 103). I had assumed that the game would have been played at a very different pace and indeed England scored at 3.6 per (6 ball) over – very poor by contemporary standards and well below the rate we have just seen in the defeat at Hobart. Connolly was the most expensive going at about a run a ball. One wonders what the fielding might have been like - Cowdrey batted at 6 and I don't recall Shuttleworth being too fleet of foot; my guess is that the chances of a shoulder dislocation from sliding were somewhat limited.
Snow said that he had Stackpole caught behind but the umpire called "over" before he had time to appeal. Can this be true? Either it was a very slow appeal or the quickest call of "over" ever. Or perhaps not - maybe some Googlies readers have evidence of quicker? Snow said that since it was just a bit of fun he wasn't too upset. Umm... I wonder if there is any footage of the match.
Incidentally, I heard some talk about Boycott at a dinner I went to just before Christmas. Apparently he had just made some money from auctioning the bat with which he made his 100th hundred. It was, so it was said, the twelfth such bat he had sold.
Keith Hardie Matters
I am pleased to report that I had a brief email from Keith Hardie saying that he, Barbara and their family were all Ok despite some scary moments after the recent earthquake in Christchurch, New Zealand
Googlies 100 Lunch
The Professor has organised a lunch to celebrate the reaching of the one hundredth edition of Googlies & Chinamen. It will take place in a box at Lord’s on Wednesday 27 April. This is the first day of Middlesex’ match against Surrey. There will be a charge of £40 to cover the cost of the box and food. If you would like to join the celebrants please email John Adams at [email protected] to reserve your place. There are limited spaces available so please do not delay. He will allocate places on a first come first served basis.
Old Danes Matters 2
The Fifth Old Danes Gathering will take place at Shepherds Bush CC on Friday 29 July from 2pm. It is open to all Old Danes, their friends and families. In previous years there have been about fifty Old Danes present during the afternoon and evening. Please advise me if you plan to attend so that I can add you to the list that I will be circulating.
Football Matters
Dr. Calvin Rickson, a scientist from Texas A&M University, has invented a bra that keeps women's breasts from jiggling, bouncing up and down, and prevents the nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in. He contacted Andrew Baker to make a presentation to his Ladies Team. After he had fitted out the ladies he was attacked by a large group of men led by Kelvin West who took him outside and kicked the shit out of him.
Googlies and Chinamen
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