GOOGLIES & CHINAMEN
An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 139
July 2014
Out & About with the Professor
I think it fair to say that I enjoy watching cricket. I’m not picky: I watch Test cricket, County cricket, one-dayers and T20s, club cricket, cricket in the park or cricket on the beach come to that. If someone is playing and I’m in the vicinity I like to watch. But the fourth day of the Headingley Test was one, frankly, that I would have preferred not to have seen. It was, I think, the worst day’s cricket I have ever seen England play (and there is some competition for that slot). With the single exception of Joe Root’s catch, England were abject.
They spent 7 overs waiting for the new ball and giving Sri Lanka 40 runs; then when the new ball arrived they bowled tripe. I have never been much of a fan of giving a player a single to get at the rabbit. OK if he is a real no-hoper but Herath is, as we know, far from that. He may be a touch eccentric but he is not a walking wicket. The result was, as one commentator said, that Matthews got 160 without us ever really trying to get him out.
And then came England’s batting. Ye gods! The drama of the fifth day cannot make up for the shambles of the fourth. There has been a lot written about Cook’s captaincy and I’m sure the correct view is that he needs the authority of getting runs. The problem is that his technique has always been one of prodding and poking. When he hits it in the middle it is very effective but it never looks great – he just prods it for four. But when things are going badly it looks dreadful. How can you prod forward to a moving ball without ever moving out of your crease? He is too successful a player not to succeed again but it is painful to watch him trying.…and the fourth day of the Headingley Test was painful.
However it gave me the opportunity to flick though my copy of Playfair and raise this question with Googlies readers. Playfair gives, as we all know, information about each player: name, date of birth, etc. and some brief details of their cricket career. It also tells us something else - where they went to school. This is so commonplace that I’ve not really thought about it before. But why should we want to know where someone has been to school? To those who answer that it is “interesting”, the question is – obviously – why does it interest you?
I watch all sorts of public entertainments: theatre, cinema, opera, etc. but I have no idea where the performers went to school – nor do I care. It would, of course, be quite easy to find out but why should I want to know? Why should I care what a man who is playing King Lear did when he was eleven? I want to know if he is good at what he does in his adult life, not in his childhood. We are not routinely told where (or indeed if) footballers went to school. I recently had a plumber and a painter working in my house; at no time did I ask them about the schooling. I was only interested in the respective abilities at slopping paint on walls and fixing leaks.
So why is cricket different? Regular Googlies readers might suspect a rhetorical element in this question…and they would be right. The only people who would really want to know such a thing are those who wish to distinguish one type of school from another and we all know what that means: fee-paying schools from state-funded schools. In other words the practice is yet another (in this case probably inadvertent) aspect of that most demeaning English characteristic, snobbery. The people who want to know want to see “boys” from “good cricket schools” getting on. Chaps from Radley and Whitgifts…that sort of thing. I have genuinely not thought about this before but no matter what desperate rationalisation might be advanced, the explanation is, and can only be, snobbery…and snobbery demeans us all.
Williams Matters
John Williams sent me this
On the first day of the Lord’s test who were spotted in the Beef Bap queue in the Long Room Bar at lunchtime - none other than the Worcestershire hierarchy - Darryl Mitchell and Steve "Bumpy" Rhodes. Also on first day "Poser" Fingleton turned up late and was unable to get his favourite seat. He paced up and down the central steps without success. It was amazing nobody advised him to go and sit in the Warner. On the last day during the hydration break before the last hour I decided it was an opportune moment to visit the gents near the old library. Whilst I was there I heard the sound of studs on the tiled floor. Glancing to my left the person was not only in whites but was wearing pads - Angelo Matthews. I suggested to the steward that he locked the door. Had he done so we would have drawn the series.
I was at Northampton for the last day of the Championship match. In the morning session Middlesex bowled 36 overs from which Northants scored just 38. This reminded me of an all day game in 1964 between Dunstable Town and Harrow Town. Dunstable batted first and were bowled out for 48. Harrow Town replied with 49 for 9. The game didn't start until 12.50 but lasted until the 17th over of the final hour. This of course was in the days of uncovered pitches and batsmen did not use clubs. I also went to the second day of Surrey v. Worcestershire match. The morning session very amusing as Vikram Solanki dropped Ross Whiteley twice and Gareth Batty dropped Moeen Ali at deep mid wicket. Then Moeen hit the first ball he faced from Batty for six over long off.
Jack’s Month
The Great Jack Morgan updates us on his sporting month
There was quite a lot in today's G (27/5) about likely comings and goings at Loftus Rd. Rio's arrival is a serious possibility. O'Neil, Green, Traore, Jenas, Zamora, Johnson, Faurlin, Young and Mbia are all out of contract this summer and it is not known how many will sign new contracts. Loanees Morrison, Assou-Ekotto, Kranjcar, Doyle, Carroll, Hughes, Maiga and Keane will all return to their parent clubs. While Cesar, Taarabt, Diakite, Granero and Remy are due to return to the club from loans out. Park is retiring because of injury. The G thinks HR wants to sign Frank Lampard (his nephew) on a short term contract.
We have been having some cool and damp weather here this week and I never got close to going to Merchant Taylors. However, I was still quite shocked that not a ball was bowled in the four days. I suppose the difference is that they do not have the sophisticated covering and drying equipment that they have at Lord's? Another factor could be that it is higher, hillier and therefore wetter around Northwood/ Moor Park than it is in the flat lowlands of Hampton. There are no more Middlesex matches for me to report on before the end of June. The number of days attended in May equalled my lowest ever since records began (despite the number of Championship matches now played in the early season): I might have to give up my membership... if I was not a life member, of course!
Today (1/6) was a decent day for weather for a change, so I might have gone to the Oval if it had not been a Sunday (travelling problems), but cloud and rain are forecast for the other three days. I missed a ton by Moeen Ali today; Gary Wilson is capt of Sy again, but I do not know if this now an appointment or not. Middlesex brought in Stirling for Rayner and Finn for Harris at Chester-le-Street and took a tonking from Stoneman and Borthwick. I feel a bit sorry for Ollie: he is a great slip catcher and a useful batsman, but he is being punished for not being able to take wickets on the green seamers' tracks they keep producing at Lord's. He might be pleased to have missed this one.
Only Toby has shone so far for Middlesex with his third consecutive 5 wicket haul and top score of 63 as Middlesex followed on. Denly made another 50 and Stirling contributed a maiden Championship 50. Rain on day 4 helped Durham hang on for another draw! Middlesex are still top, but only by 5 points and have played a game (2 games in some cases) more.
Gareth Berg is out for the season.
It was sad to hear of the death of your old hero Don Bennett, Middlesex’s coach for 29 seasons. I also remember him playing at Loftus Road for Coventry City.
Dan Housego made his first appearance for Gloucs for nearly a year and made 0! He did get to bowl 6 overs though and made 27 second time around as Gloucs fought back to achieve a remarkable draw against Surrey at Bristol.
I am bitterly disappointed not to have won George's competition: if they had picked Woakesy at no 8, I would have won.
I was delighted, of course, that Robbo made such a success of his second outing for Eng at Headingley, but also sad, of course, as it means that Middlesex will now see little of him. I have been disappointed with Moeen so far: he is a better player than that (though I never saw him as the sole spinner). It was nice to see Plunkers doing well with the ball too: he had a long time in the doldrums after a bright start at Durham, but has now resurrected his career thanks to Yorks. Day 4 was as bad a day for Eng as I can remember, but full credit to A Mathews and his team. I never expected the lads to get so close to the draw on day 5, so it was disappointing to get so near, but still lose. Eng had had the better of most days in this series, so defeat must have been tough to take, but at least my faith in Moeen has been restored. B Stokes looks certain to be called up and on the form shown in this Test, he should replace Jordan (0-137) rather than Plunkett (9-176)...unless they decide to "rest" someone?
JSCR enquired if I was aware that there was a football world cup taking place at the moment. I replied that if he was serious about a world cup being on at the moment, then please could he explain why there has not been anything in the media about it!
There is a daft match taking place at Grace road between 14 of Leicestershire and 18 of India. Remind me: what century are we in?
The Valentine Day Challenge
Back in the winter George set us a challenge. He returns now with the result
Following the winter marmalising of England’s batting I got to musing about who would bat for England this summer. My guess was that others would as well. So I issued the following challenge on 14th February to anyone who would be prepared to put their names to paper.
“You have to guess England’s batting order 1-8 for the 1st Test on the 12th June at Lords.
The rules are simple:
You get a point for each player correctly named
You get a point for each player named in the right position in the batting order
So, 16 points maximum
Entries to me please before the end of February”
There were 12 entries in all, including 3 from my brother, two of them spurious, with one thinly disguised as coming from his wife and another from his senior cat. However, well done Rosemary who outscored both Jim and the cat.
In the way of rule benders there were also requests to extend the deadline. I refused, because I thought that the emerging picture would be less interesting than the snapshot of a given moment in time for everyone. Many failed to take up the challenge: we can only assume that there was no entry from J.C. Adams because of his (hitherto undisclosed) advisory capacity to the England selectors.
The difficulty of the task was highlighted by the entry from Harry Compton who only managed to identify three of the final 8, with only one, Cook in the right (or, as it turned out, wrong position). A total of 19 players were identified. I was the only one to include Trott, to my cost, because towards the end of February he appeared on a programme on Sky and said he was back. That lasted about 6 weeks, until he went to the crease again.
None of us predicted the Ben ‘Hurt Locker’ Stokes injury, of course, effectively reducing the maximum score to 14.
So well done to Alex Brodie for scoring 9 out of the possible 16. He wins the prize of a bottle of wine appropriately labeled: ‘Revolution’:
George makes his presentation to Alex Brodie
All change? I know Jim has a fancy that Morgan will captain England in all three forms of the game this summer. So how about this for the first eight in the final test against India?
Compton
Carberry
Borthwick
Taylor
Morgan (capt.)
Stokes
Buttler
Woakes
Oval Matters
The Great Jack Morgan reports on his visit to the Oval
I went to the Oval to see Surrey take on bottom team Leicestershire in the County Championship Division Two. South Africa's Hashim Amla (born in Durban) was in great form for Surrey hitting 71 off 77 balls with 11 fours and Jason Roy (also born in Durban) was just as impressive while scoring 76 off 84 balls with 12 fours and a six. Ex-England ODI man Vikram Solanki (born in Udaipur, India) played more of a sheet anchor role sharing stands of 63 with Amla and 77 with Roy before falling for a valuable 54 with 8 fours. Despite these sound contributions, however, Surrey were looking in a little trouble on 243 for 7 when Ireland’s Gary Wilson (born in Dundonald) was joined by England's Chris Tremlett. This pair matched each other run for run over a period of nearly four hours as the two added a match winning 192 for the eighth wicket before Tremlett fell for a career best 90 off 183 balls with 10 fours and a six. Skipper and keeper Wilson found a surprisingly useful partner in England ODI man Jade Dernbach (born in Jo'burg) and the pair added an entertaining 82 in an unbroken last wicket stand before Wilson called a halt on 522 for 9 with his own contribution standing on a magnificent 160* off 296 balls with 21 fours and 2 sixes. Loughborough man Rob Taylor was the best of the bowlers, taking 3 for 81 with his left arm seamers.
Gus Robson, from Sydney, looked like a smaller but more fluent version of his big brother opening the batting for Leics, but he was receiving little support from his team-mates. Dan Redfern helped him add 73 for the third wicket, while Ireland's Niall O'Brien and Ben Raine put on 59 for the eighth wicket, but Robson was the only batsman to do better than O'Brien's 33. Robson fell right at the end of day 2 (rather unluckily as play had been held up because we had to wait several minutes to get the floodlights working to counter the gathering gloom) for an exceptionally competent 75 off 112 balls with 12 fours. Tremlett was the best of the home bowlers with 3 for 28 in 14.3 overs as the visitors closed on 271 all out.
Leics followed on 251 runs behind, but they made a better start this time and Robson was again at the heart of their effort. Matt Boyce helped him put on 67 for the first wicket and Ned Eckersley joined him in a partnership of 74 for the second wicket, but when Robson fell (again right at the end of day 3) for an excellent 81 off 132 balls with 9 fours, Leics looked in trouble. Robson had thoroughly impressed us in this match: his legspinners looked promising (and certainly better than his big brother's, but that is faint praise), but his batting is already looking the finished article at the age of 22 and some were saying that he looked better than Sam. Leics, however, slumped from 141 for 1 to 225 for 9 as the Surrey spin "twins" Zafar Ansari (from Hampton School and Cambridge University) and Gareth Batty got stuck into the weakish Leics batting. Surprisingly, the visitors rallied at this stage and the instigator of the revival was the well travelled no 11 Charlie Shreck, one of the game's greatest rabbits, who has a career batting average of under 6, but who is now (at the age of 36) finally finding his batting form. He made 28* in the first innings and now excelled himself with a career best of 56 off 69 balls with 7 fours in a last wicket partnership of 94 with Jigar Naik, who also deserves credit for his 37* from no 10, as Leics reached 319 all out. Ansari (5 for 93) and Batty (4 for 83) were the heroes as Surrey needed only 69 to win and Rory Burns and Ansari took only 14.1 overs to give Surrey the win by 10 wickets.
County caps were awarded to Solanki and Tremlett at tea on day 2. I found myself questioning why Josh Cobb is captain of Leics and indeed why he is in the team. He made 17 and 8 batting at 6 in this match and did not bowl and last season he averaged 14.62 with the bat and took 0-202. One thing in his favour is that he is still only 23, but he is clearly struggling, so why burden him with the captaincy? Surrey 23 points Leics 4. Surrey are third in the Division 2 table, but have played a game more than all the other teams.
Allan 'Punchy' Keates
I received the following from Alvin Nienow
The sad news is that Allan Keates died suddenly of some sort of heart attack or stroke on 5th June. Certainly some of the older readers of Googlies would have done as he played at the Bush in the first team with considerable success taking over 100 wickets a year from 1958 -1961 as an opening bowler with a ferocious yorker; and then suddenly lost the yorker and his first team place. However, he played for the 2nd team for about another 20 years, some of the time as captain and returned there regularly for Old Danes reunions and their cricket week".
Peter Burke sent me this
I have put together a couple of stories about Allan which in a way, sum up his 'talents' as a 'Bush' 2ndXI skipper and the last one about his misadventures with the opposite sex in his teacher training days! In the dark and distant past Cleaver and I played in a '2's game over at North Mid on the smaller pitch next to the main pitch. It had a boundary on one side of about 30 yards! The opening bat for North Mid was a dance band leader called Wolf Phillips. Our erstwhile leader remembered that Wolf only had one scoring shot - a sort of slap/hoick over mid wicket/square leg and therefore instructed his bowlers to 'feed' this shot and we would be bound to get him out cheaply.
An hour and over 100 runs later, Mr Phillips was 86 not out! Our leader refused to change the battle plan one iota, until one of his rebellious bowlers delivered a soft half volley outside the off stump which Mr Phillips duly tickled to the keeper to be caught behind. The skipper sulked for the rest of the day ranting against the rebellious 'Bush' youth of today ignoring his carefully laid plans. Thank God someone did!
The second incident also involves Cleaver and aptly demonstrates our Captain's support and faith in his players. Early on in an innings, I forget against who, the opener suddenly opened his shoulders and launched one into the stratosphere over mid on where Cleaver lurked with intent. I haven't seen a ball hit higher, as it descended through 500 feet, Cleaver stumbled around in ever decreasing circles trying to get a reading on its flight pattern - not to be helped by his Captain's very loud aside to the other 10 members of the team "He won't catch that!" Correct! Cleaver never got a hand on it and strenuously denied it was a chance dropped - as he never touched it!
Lastly a story from his courting days that still brings tears to my eyes, even today! During his teacher training days somewhere on the south coast, Mr Keates took a young lady out for drink to an old pub on the South Downs. It pissed down all night and the gents loo was in the dark, outside. Prior to escorting the young lady home, our friend decided on a quick 'jimmy riddle' in the pitch black and stormy weather. In his haste to return inside he zipped up a little too quickly and caught his male appendage in the aforementioned zipper - it would not be moved. In some pain he made some feeble excuse to his date, dropped her off at her flat and raced home to sort the problem out. Apparently nothing would move the offending item, as the pain had to an extent worn off and it was one o'clock, he decided not to go to casualty but wait until morning. He therefore carefully cut the jammed zipper (still attached to his person) out of his trousers with a pair of scissors and retired to bed!
The next morning he pitched up at the nearest casualty department and quietly asked whether he could see the male duty doctor privately. The young doctor laughed uproariously, said it happened quite frequently and called in all the female staff to see him perform this very delicate operation! The offending zipper was surgically removed and he had to have ten stitches, in a circular pattern, on his member, to close the wound. Afterwards he would forever claim that the knobbly, hardened scar tissue on his penile muscle had a very beneficial effect on certain parts of the female anatomy!! All's well that ends well then? But it still brings tears to my eyes thinking about it!!
A dear friend and old mate who will be sadly missed.
Middlesex Matters
The Great Jack Morgan reports from Richmond
I had three enjoyable days at Richmond as Middlesex 2s cruised to a seven wicket victory over Gloucestershire at Old Deer Park. Middlesex fielded a weakened team because several second team players were required to fill in for the first team at Oxford, while the Gloucs team also looked weak. Visiting skipper Jack Taylor chose to bat first, but his team could not take advantage of good batting conditions. Tiny wicket keeper and opening batsman Cameron Herring, from Abergavenny, was the best of the visiting batsmen with an accomplished 71, but the only other batsman to make more than 22 was the tall offspinner, Tom Shrewsbury, born in Southampton but brought up in Cornwall, who made 40* at no 8, as Gloucs finished on a disappointing 197 all out.
Young Aussie legspinner Nathan Sowter was impressive for Middlesex with 3 for 45, while 19 year old offspinner Fred Fairhead, from Hammersmith and Radley College, picked up 3 for 25 at the end of the innings. The Middlesex innings was going well on 85-2 (skipper and Irish international Andy Balbirnie had made a good looking 40) when keeper Steve Eskinazi, born in Johannesburg, but brought up in Western Australia, had to retire. This caused an immediate slump to 94 for 5 and then to 143 for 7, before the returning Eskinazi shared an excellent stand of 96 for the eighth wicket with Fairhead. Eskinazi fell for 79, but Fairhead went on to 59* as Middlesex finished on 263, a lead of 66. The best of the visiting bowlers was 18 year old Brandon Gilmore, from Bulawayo, with 4-26.
Herring was again the best of the visiting batsmen in the second innings and this time he received better support from Taylor (32) and the young no 4 batsman, Jack Garrett (33) as Gloucs reached 139 for 2. Wickets fell frequently after that however and Herring finally departed for an outstanding 91 as Gloucs closed on 249 all out. Towards the end of the innings there was a cameo of 25* from 17 year old keeper Patrick Grieshaber from Bath, who was soon to find himself keeping for the first XI in the absence of both Herring and Gareth Roderick, presumably injured. Tall 18-year-old academy opening bowler, Jamie Odell from Wexham, returned the best second innings figures for Middlesex with 3-62. Eskinazi did a fine job behind the stumps and finished with 7 victims in the match. England Under 19s man Ryan Higgins, from Harare, was the star of the Middlesex second innings as he led the home team to a comfortable win with time and wickets to spare. Support came from 22 year old Andrew Lowe (31), from Sydney, in a third wicket stand of 59 and another promising academy youngster Don Manuwelge, from West London but of Sri Lankan parentage (24*) in an unbroken fourth wicket partnership of 76. Higgins deservedly took the plaudits, however, as he reached a brilliant 100* off the final ball of the match. Garrett stood out in the field for Gloucs, taking 5 excellent catches at first slip. Readers of The Cricketer might want to know that this month's One to Watch (p99 of the July issue), 17 year old George Hankins from Millfield School, batted at 5 for Gloucs in this match and bowled some offspin, but will surely have more luck on other occasions.
The Run Out
I met up with the Professor at Headingley in June and we spent much of the day discussing and chortling over his correspondence with Douglas Miller in connection with the Run Out issue. He agreed to send me a truncated version for possible inclusion in Googlies. In the event even this turned out to be nine pages long and so I decided to exercise severe editorial prerogative.
The Professor: Douglas Miller and I have long disagreed about the Law relating to the backing-up batsman and the Buttler run-out re-ignited our combined indignation. Roughly speaking Douglas likes the law as it is (it prevents bowlers “feigning” a delivery and running out a batsman who has fractionally left his crease) and I think that batsmen should stay in their crease until the ball has been bowled.
Douglas: The law, of course, was not applied but the regulation was.
Personally I think the amendment – it is the same for ECB first-class as for ICC – is unnecessary and regrettable for two reasons:
1. Minor tweaks cause confusion – to players, umpires and commentators. Note Holding’s original comments before sense was spoken between innings.
2. By amending from delivery stride to delivery swing, a change you presumably welcome, it has been made much easier to catch a batsman going about his normal business.
The Professor: I still do not understand your position however. Why is it unsporting/unfair to run someone out but not unsporting to run a couple of yards less than you are supposed to? Is there an operational problem too? You are the experienced umpire. Is it possible to look at the back crease, checking the no-ball and, simultaneously, be looking several feet to the side (depending upon where he is standing) to check that the batsman is still in his ground? And can you also/alternatively watch the bowler’s “swing”. And when you’ve done all that, check that the ball pitches in line, etc., etc. I assume that when they change the laws/regulations (or what the TV men call “rules”) someone does ask the umpiring fraternity if it is actually possible to administer the change.
Douglas: The answer is desperately simple. On the one hand it has long been the established custom to warn a batsman before whipping off the bails – and even then it is considered a bit underhand. As evidence of this you yourself say you have never run anyone out, and there has not been an instance of it in the English county game since 1956 – and even then it was after three warnings. All this is evidence of the practice, rightly or wrongly, being almost universally regarded as unsporting. On the other hand, the batsman charging up the pitch is not regarded as unsporting because there is nothing in the law forbidding him from doing so.
The Professor: I think I have grasped the issue now...at long last. It is the opprobrium problem rather than the "legal" one which gives you so much difficulty. I had assumed you would be something of a stickler for the Laws but it seems I am (uncharacteristically) cast in that role and you are (uncharacteristically?) tied in these casuistic knots. Let's be fair, my solution is simpler: define what being in your ground is, and say what can happen if you're not. Finis. C'est tout!
King Cricket Matters
Ged writes:
Early season, I always try to take in a day of county cricket with my old friend, Charley “The Gent” Malloy. It helps us both to get over those winter withdrawal symptoms. Charley has his favourite place to sit at the start of play – “Death Row” right at the front of the Pavilion, close to but not exactly behind the wicket. By 11am, we were well set in those seats. But Charley was in thoughtful mood.
“I’m going to be very careful what I say today,” said Charley.
“Why’s that?” I asked.
“Because anything I say might end up in your King Cricket report, showing me to be the idiot and you to be the clever clogs.”
“But if you don’t say anything worth reporting at all, you know I’ll just make stuff up,” I replied. Charley laughed.
We tucked in to smoked salmon rolls (whisky smoked – the salmon, not the rolls) with a nice little Alsatian Gewürztraminer to wash them down. Later we had Parma ham in Ciabatta bread, washed down with a rather elegant albeit Australian Shiraz. Between and beyond those major courses were other tasty morsels, including honey-roasted cashews, savoury sesame cracker-thingies and some very jolly posh chocolate biscuits.
We discussed many things during the day, including my latest hobby, learning to play the baritone ukulele very badly; the latest exploits of Charley’s son and daughter; together with news of the house refurbishment carried out by Charley and Mrs Malloy over the winter.
While in the Grandstand for the middle session of the day, a chap sitting with a friend not far behind us, started to snore, increasingly loudly as the session went on. At tea, the sleeper woke up and said: “It really is lovely being with you here at Lord’s,” to which his mate replied: “I’m not sure you have entirely been with me.”
“Hmm,” said the sleeper. “I suppose I might have nodded off for a moment just then.”
At stumps, Charley wondered what I might report about him on King Cricket. “Will you tell them about me trying to remember a pint-sized cricketer who looked a bit like that little-feller on the field of play, only to discover that the little feller was the very chap I was trying to remember?”
“Unlikely to make the cut”, I replied.
“What about me not realising that your baritone ukulele is different from the instruments that George Formby used to play?” asked Charley.
“A mistake that many would make, Charley. The baritone ukulele is normally tuned as a four-stringed guitar, very different from the banjolele and conventional ukulele, but the distinction is a bit music-geeky.”
Charley and I decided not to have a final, post-stumps drink – I needed to get home and prepare for work the next day. I walked home my usual route. Three minutes from home, as I’m walking past the Prince Edward, a loud voice rings out, “Ged Ladd” (or words to that effect). “Stentor Baritone”, (or words to that effect), I reply. An extraordinary coincidence for several reasons, not least because I had never heard of a baritone ukulele, let alone a Stentor Baritone ukulele, when I granted my MCC friend that KC pseudonym some years ago. Also because Stentor no longer lives on my patch, nor does the publisher chum, also an acquaintance of mine, with whom Stentor was having an outside drink, en route to a restaurant. Being an MCC member, Stentor Baritone was naturally unaware that today had been a match day at Lord’s, nor indeed that the cricket season had even begun. Equally naturally, I joined the pair for a quick drink, leaving my work preparation to a slightly foggier, later hour.
Don Bennett
Allen Bruton sent me this
I was really sorry to hear of the death of such a great contributor to Middlesex over so many years. In 1953 I was taken to Lords by my father to see my first game of county cricket, Middlesex playing Surrey. Arriving after lunch we sat on the grass behind the boundary, most of the seating being occupied as was quite common for this fixture in the 1950’s.
Despite Denis Compton scoring a century, the memory I came away with was that of Don Bennett hitting a six over long on during an innings of 45. As a seven year old I was completely awestruck by a batsman being able to strike a ball so far, a feeling that in my case persisted throughout my playing career. However from that day he became my boyhood hero and on receipt of the Evening News or News Chronicle I would immediately check his performance.
Coincidentally in my early teens having moved to Hillingdon with my parents I soon discovered that my hero lived just a few hundred yards away. Later in my South Hampstead days, Don was our coach at the Finchley Indoor Winter Nets and would join us in the bar for a drink and chat after nets. It came as a great relief not to have my illusions shattered when finding that my boyhood hero was also a thoroughly nice bloke.
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An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 139
July 2014
Out & About with the Professor
I think it fair to say that I enjoy watching cricket. I’m not picky: I watch Test cricket, County cricket, one-dayers and T20s, club cricket, cricket in the park or cricket on the beach come to that. If someone is playing and I’m in the vicinity I like to watch. But the fourth day of the Headingley Test was one, frankly, that I would have preferred not to have seen. It was, I think, the worst day’s cricket I have ever seen England play (and there is some competition for that slot). With the single exception of Joe Root’s catch, England were abject.
They spent 7 overs waiting for the new ball and giving Sri Lanka 40 runs; then when the new ball arrived they bowled tripe. I have never been much of a fan of giving a player a single to get at the rabbit. OK if he is a real no-hoper but Herath is, as we know, far from that. He may be a touch eccentric but he is not a walking wicket. The result was, as one commentator said, that Matthews got 160 without us ever really trying to get him out.
And then came England’s batting. Ye gods! The drama of the fifth day cannot make up for the shambles of the fourth. There has been a lot written about Cook’s captaincy and I’m sure the correct view is that he needs the authority of getting runs. The problem is that his technique has always been one of prodding and poking. When he hits it in the middle it is very effective but it never looks great – he just prods it for four. But when things are going badly it looks dreadful. How can you prod forward to a moving ball without ever moving out of your crease? He is too successful a player not to succeed again but it is painful to watch him trying.…and the fourth day of the Headingley Test was painful.
However it gave me the opportunity to flick though my copy of Playfair and raise this question with Googlies readers. Playfair gives, as we all know, information about each player: name, date of birth, etc. and some brief details of their cricket career. It also tells us something else - where they went to school. This is so commonplace that I’ve not really thought about it before. But why should we want to know where someone has been to school? To those who answer that it is “interesting”, the question is – obviously – why does it interest you?
I watch all sorts of public entertainments: theatre, cinema, opera, etc. but I have no idea where the performers went to school – nor do I care. It would, of course, be quite easy to find out but why should I want to know? Why should I care what a man who is playing King Lear did when he was eleven? I want to know if he is good at what he does in his adult life, not in his childhood. We are not routinely told where (or indeed if) footballers went to school. I recently had a plumber and a painter working in my house; at no time did I ask them about the schooling. I was only interested in the respective abilities at slopping paint on walls and fixing leaks.
So why is cricket different? Regular Googlies readers might suspect a rhetorical element in this question…and they would be right. The only people who would really want to know such a thing are those who wish to distinguish one type of school from another and we all know what that means: fee-paying schools from state-funded schools. In other words the practice is yet another (in this case probably inadvertent) aspect of that most demeaning English characteristic, snobbery. The people who want to know want to see “boys” from “good cricket schools” getting on. Chaps from Radley and Whitgifts…that sort of thing. I have genuinely not thought about this before but no matter what desperate rationalisation might be advanced, the explanation is, and can only be, snobbery…and snobbery demeans us all.
Williams Matters
John Williams sent me this
On the first day of the Lord’s test who were spotted in the Beef Bap queue in the Long Room Bar at lunchtime - none other than the Worcestershire hierarchy - Darryl Mitchell and Steve "Bumpy" Rhodes. Also on first day "Poser" Fingleton turned up late and was unable to get his favourite seat. He paced up and down the central steps without success. It was amazing nobody advised him to go and sit in the Warner. On the last day during the hydration break before the last hour I decided it was an opportune moment to visit the gents near the old library. Whilst I was there I heard the sound of studs on the tiled floor. Glancing to my left the person was not only in whites but was wearing pads - Angelo Matthews. I suggested to the steward that he locked the door. Had he done so we would have drawn the series.
I was at Northampton for the last day of the Championship match. In the morning session Middlesex bowled 36 overs from which Northants scored just 38. This reminded me of an all day game in 1964 between Dunstable Town and Harrow Town. Dunstable batted first and were bowled out for 48. Harrow Town replied with 49 for 9. The game didn't start until 12.50 but lasted until the 17th over of the final hour. This of course was in the days of uncovered pitches and batsmen did not use clubs. I also went to the second day of Surrey v. Worcestershire match. The morning session very amusing as Vikram Solanki dropped Ross Whiteley twice and Gareth Batty dropped Moeen Ali at deep mid wicket. Then Moeen hit the first ball he faced from Batty for six over long off.
Jack’s Month
The Great Jack Morgan updates us on his sporting month
There was quite a lot in today's G (27/5) about likely comings and goings at Loftus Rd. Rio's arrival is a serious possibility. O'Neil, Green, Traore, Jenas, Zamora, Johnson, Faurlin, Young and Mbia are all out of contract this summer and it is not known how many will sign new contracts. Loanees Morrison, Assou-Ekotto, Kranjcar, Doyle, Carroll, Hughes, Maiga and Keane will all return to their parent clubs. While Cesar, Taarabt, Diakite, Granero and Remy are due to return to the club from loans out. Park is retiring because of injury. The G thinks HR wants to sign Frank Lampard (his nephew) on a short term contract.
We have been having some cool and damp weather here this week and I never got close to going to Merchant Taylors. However, I was still quite shocked that not a ball was bowled in the four days. I suppose the difference is that they do not have the sophisticated covering and drying equipment that they have at Lord's? Another factor could be that it is higher, hillier and therefore wetter around Northwood/ Moor Park than it is in the flat lowlands of Hampton. There are no more Middlesex matches for me to report on before the end of June. The number of days attended in May equalled my lowest ever since records began (despite the number of Championship matches now played in the early season): I might have to give up my membership... if I was not a life member, of course!
Today (1/6) was a decent day for weather for a change, so I might have gone to the Oval if it had not been a Sunday (travelling problems), but cloud and rain are forecast for the other three days. I missed a ton by Moeen Ali today; Gary Wilson is capt of Sy again, but I do not know if this now an appointment or not. Middlesex brought in Stirling for Rayner and Finn for Harris at Chester-le-Street and took a tonking from Stoneman and Borthwick. I feel a bit sorry for Ollie: he is a great slip catcher and a useful batsman, but he is being punished for not being able to take wickets on the green seamers' tracks they keep producing at Lord's. He might be pleased to have missed this one.
Only Toby has shone so far for Middlesex with his third consecutive 5 wicket haul and top score of 63 as Middlesex followed on. Denly made another 50 and Stirling contributed a maiden Championship 50. Rain on day 4 helped Durham hang on for another draw! Middlesex are still top, but only by 5 points and have played a game (2 games in some cases) more.
Gareth Berg is out for the season.
It was sad to hear of the death of your old hero Don Bennett, Middlesex’s coach for 29 seasons. I also remember him playing at Loftus Road for Coventry City.
Dan Housego made his first appearance for Gloucs for nearly a year and made 0! He did get to bowl 6 overs though and made 27 second time around as Gloucs fought back to achieve a remarkable draw against Surrey at Bristol.
I am bitterly disappointed not to have won George's competition: if they had picked Woakesy at no 8, I would have won.
I was delighted, of course, that Robbo made such a success of his second outing for Eng at Headingley, but also sad, of course, as it means that Middlesex will now see little of him. I have been disappointed with Moeen so far: he is a better player than that (though I never saw him as the sole spinner). It was nice to see Plunkers doing well with the ball too: he had a long time in the doldrums after a bright start at Durham, but has now resurrected his career thanks to Yorks. Day 4 was as bad a day for Eng as I can remember, but full credit to A Mathews and his team. I never expected the lads to get so close to the draw on day 5, so it was disappointing to get so near, but still lose. Eng had had the better of most days in this series, so defeat must have been tough to take, but at least my faith in Moeen has been restored. B Stokes looks certain to be called up and on the form shown in this Test, he should replace Jordan (0-137) rather than Plunkett (9-176)...unless they decide to "rest" someone?
JSCR enquired if I was aware that there was a football world cup taking place at the moment. I replied that if he was serious about a world cup being on at the moment, then please could he explain why there has not been anything in the media about it!
There is a daft match taking place at Grace road between 14 of Leicestershire and 18 of India. Remind me: what century are we in?
The Valentine Day Challenge
Back in the winter George set us a challenge. He returns now with the result
Following the winter marmalising of England’s batting I got to musing about who would bat for England this summer. My guess was that others would as well. So I issued the following challenge on 14th February to anyone who would be prepared to put their names to paper.
“You have to guess England’s batting order 1-8 for the 1st Test on the 12th June at Lords.
The rules are simple:
You get a point for each player correctly named
You get a point for each player named in the right position in the batting order
So, 16 points maximum
Entries to me please before the end of February”
There were 12 entries in all, including 3 from my brother, two of them spurious, with one thinly disguised as coming from his wife and another from his senior cat. However, well done Rosemary who outscored both Jim and the cat.
In the way of rule benders there were also requests to extend the deadline. I refused, because I thought that the emerging picture would be less interesting than the snapshot of a given moment in time for everyone. Many failed to take up the challenge: we can only assume that there was no entry from J.C. Adams because of his (hitherto undisclosed) advisory capacity to the England selectors.
The difficulty of the task was highlighted by the entry from Harry Compton who only managed to identify three of the final 8, with only one, Cook in the right (or, as it turned out, wrong position). A total of 19 players were identified. I was the only one to include Trott, to my cost, because towards the end of February he appeared on a programme on Sky and said he was back. That lasted about 6 weeks, until he went to the crease again.
None of us predicted the Ben ‘Hurt Locker’ Stokes injury, of course, effectively reducing the maximum score to 14.
So well done to Alex Brodie for scoring 9 out of the possible 16. He wins the prize of a bottle of wine appropriately labeled: ‘Revolution’:
George makes his presentation to Alex Brodie
All change? I know Jim has a fancy that Morgan will captain England in all three forms of the game this summer. So how about this for the first eight in the final test against India?
Compton
Carberry
Borthwick
Taylor
Morgan (capt.)
Stokes
Buttler
Woakes
Oval Matters
The Great Jack Morgan reports on his visit to the Oval
I went to the Oval to see Surrey take on bottom team Leicestershire in the County Championship Division Two. South Africa's Hashim Amla (born in Durban) was in great form for Surrey hitting 71 off 77 balls with 11 fours and Jason Roy (also born in Durban) was just as impressive while scoring 76 off 84 balls with 12 fours and a six. Ex-England ODI man Vikram Solanki (born in Udaipur, India) played more of a sheet anchor role sharing stands of 63 with Amla and 77 with Roy before falling for a valuable 54 with 8 fours. Despite these sound contributions, however, Surrey were looking in a little trouble on 243 for 7 when Ireland’s Gary Wilson (born in Dundonald) was joined by England's Chris Tremlett. This pair matched each other run for run over a period of nearly four hours as the two added a match winning 192 for the eighth wicket before Tremlett fell for a career best 90 off 183 balls with 10 fours and a six. Skipper and keeper Wilson found a surprisingly useful partner in England ODI man Jade Dernbach (born in Jo'burg) and the pair added an entertaining 82 in an unbroken last wicket stand before Wilson called a halt on 522 for 9 with his own contribution standing on a magnificent 160* off 296 balls with 21 fours and 2 sixes. Loughborough man Rob Taylor was the best of the bowlers, taking 3 for 81 with his left arm seamers.
Gus Robson, from Sydney, looked like a smaller but more fluent version of his big brother opening the batting for Leics, but he was receiving little support from his team-mates. Dan Redfern helped him add 73 for the third wicket, while Ireland's Niall O'Brien and Ben Raine put on 59 for the eighth wicket, but Robson was the only batsman to do better than O'Brien's 33. Robson fell right at the end of day 2 (rather unluckily as play had been held up because we had to wait several minutes to get the floodlights working to counter the gathering gloom) for an exceptionally competent 75 off 112 balls with 12 fours. Tremlett was the best of the home bowlers with 3 for 28 in 14.3 overs as the visitors closed on 271 all out.
Leics followed on 251 runs behind, but they made a better start this time and Robson was again at the heart of their effort. Matt Boyce helped him put on 67 for the first wicket and Ned Eckersley joined him in a partnership of 74 for the second wicket, but when Robson fell (again right at the end of day 3) for an excellent 81 off 132 balls with 9 fours, Leics looked in trouble. Robson had thoroughly impressed us in this match: his legspinners looked promising (and certainly better than his big brother's, but that is faint praise), but his batting is already looking the finished article at the age of 22 and some were saying that he looked better than Sam. Leics, however, slumped from 141 for 1 to 225 for 9 as the Surrey spin "twins" Zafar Ansari (from Hampton School and Cambridge University) and Gareth Batty got stuck into the weakish Leics batting. Surprisingly, the visitors rallied at this stage and the instigator of the revival was the well travelled no 11 Charlie Shreck, one of the game's greatest rabbits, who has a career batting average of under 6, but who is now (at the age of 36) finally finding his batting form. He made 28* in the first innings and now excelled himself with a career best of 56 off 69 balls with 7 fours in a last wicket partnership of 94 with Jigar Naik, who also deserves credit for his 37* from no 10, as Leics reached 319 all out. Ansari (5 for 93) and Batty (4 for 83) were the heroes as Surrey needed only 69 to win and Rory Burns and Ansari took only 14.1 overs to give Surrey the win by 10 wickets.
County caps were awarded to Solanki and Tremlett at tea on day 2. I found myself questioning why Josh Cobb is captain of Leics and indeed why he is in the team. He made 17 and 8 batting at 6 in this match and did not bowl and last season he averaged 14.62 with the bat and took 0-202. One thing in his favour is that he is still only 23, but he is clearly struggling, so why burden him with the captaincy? Surrey 23 points Leics 4. Surrey are third in the Division 2 table, but have played a game more than all the other teams.
Allan 'Punchy' Keates
I received the following from Alvin Nienow
The sad news is that Allan Keates died suddenly of some sort of heart attack or stroke on 5th June. Certainly some of the older readers of Googlies would have done as he played at the Bush in the first team with considerable success taking over 100 wickets a year from 1958 -1961 as an opening bowler with a ferocious yorker; and then suddenly lost the yorker and his first team place. However, he played for the 2nd team for about another 20 years, some of the time as captain and returned there regularly for Old Danes reunions and their cricket week".
Peter Burke sent me this
I have put together a couple of stories about Allan which in a way, sum up his 'talents' as a 'Bush' 2ndXI skipper and the last one about his misadventures with the opposite sex in his teacher training days! In the dark and distant past Cleaver and I played in a '2's game over at North Mid on the smaller pitch next to the main pitch. It had a boundary on one side of about 30 yards! The opening bat for North Mid was a dance band leader called Wolf Phillips. Our erstwhile leader remembered that Wolf only had one scoring shot - a sort of slap/hoick over mid wicket/square leg and therefore instructed his bowlers to 'feed' this shot and we would be bound to get him out cheaply.
An hour and over 100 runs later, Mr Phillips was 86 not out! Our leader refused to change the battle plan one iota, until one of his rebellious bowlers delivered a soft half volley outside the off stump which Mr Phillips duly tickled to the keeper to be caught behind. The skipper sulked for the rest of the day ranting against the rebellious 'Bush' youth of today ignoring his carefully laid plans. Thank God someone did!
The second incident also involves Cleaver and aptly demonstrates our Captain's support and faith in his players. Early on in an innings, I forget against who, the opener suddenly opened his shoulders and launched one into the stratosphere over mid on where Cleaver lurked with intent. I haven't seen a ball hit higher, as it descended through 500 feet, Cleaver stumbled around in ever decreasing circles trying to get a reading on its flight pattern - not to be helped by his Captain's very loud aside to the other 10 members of the team "He won't catch that!" Correct! Cleaver never got a hand on it and strenuously denied it was a chance dropped - as he never touched it!
Lastly a story from his courting days that still brings tears to my eyes, even today! During his teacher training days somewhere on the south coast, Mr Keates took a young lady out for drink to an old pub on the South Downs. It pissed down all night and the gents loo was in the dark, outside. Prior to escorting the young lady home, our friend decided on a quick 'jimmy riddle' in the pitch black and stormy weather. In his haste to return inside he zipped up a little too quickly and caught his male appendage in the aforementioned zipper - it would not be moved. In some pain he made some feeble excuse to his date, dropped her off at her flat and raced home to sort the problem out. Apparently nothing would move the offending item, as the pain had to an extent worn off and it was one o'clock, he decided not to go to casualty but wait until morning. He therefore carefully cut the jammed zipper (still attached to his person) out of his trousers with a pair of scissors and retired to bed!
The next morning he pitched up at the nearest casualty department and quietly asked whether he could see the male duty doctor privately. The young doctor laughed uproariously, said it happened quite frequently and called in all the female staff to see him perform this very delicate operation! The offending zipper was surgically removed and he had to have ten stitches, in a circular pattern, on his member, to close the wound. Afterwards he would forever claim that the knobbly, hardened scar tissue on his penile muscle had a very beneficial effect on certain parts of the female anatomy!! All's well that ends well then? But it still brings tears to my eyes thinking about it!!
A dear friend and old mate who will be sadly missed.
Middlesex Matters
The Great Jack Morgan reports from Richmond
I had three enjoyable days at Richmond as Middlesex 2s cruised to a seven wicket victory over Gloucestershire at Old Deer Park. Middlesex fielded a weakened team because several second team players were required to fill in for the first team at Oxford, while the Gloucs team also looked weak. Visiting skipper Jack Taylor chose to bat first, but his team could not take advantage of good batting conditions. Tiny wicket keeper and opening batsman Cameron Herring, from Abergavenny, was the best of the visiting batsmen with an accomplished 71, but the only other batsman to make more than 22 was the tall offspinner, Tom Shrewsbury, born in Southampton but brought up in Cornwall, who made 40* at no 8, as Gloucs finished on a disappointing 197 all out.
Young Aussie legspinner Nathan Sowter was impressive for Middlesex with 3 for 45, while 19 year old offspinner Fred Fairhead, from Hammersmith and Radley College, picked up 3 for 25 at the end of the innings. The Middlesex innings was going well on 85-2 (skipper and Irish international Andy Balbirnie had made a good looking 40) when keeper Steve Eskinazi, born in Johannesburg, but brought up in Western Australia, had to retire. This caused an immediate slump to 94 for 5 and then to 143 for 7, before the returning Eskinazi shared an excellent stand of 96 for the eighth wicket with Fairhead. Eskinazi fell for 79, but Fairhead went on to 59* as Middlesex finished on 263, a lead of 66. The best of the visiting bowlers was 18 year old Brandon Gilmore, from Bulawayo, with 4-26.
Herring was again the best of the visiting batsmen in the second innings and this time he received better support from Taylor (32) and the young no 4 batsman, Jack Garrett (33) as Gloucs reached 139 for 2. Wickets fell frequently after that however and Herring finally departed for an outstanding 91 as Gloucs closed on 249 all out. Towards the end of the innings there was a cameo of 25* from 17 year old keeper Patrick Grieshaber from Bath, who was soon to find himself keeping for the first XI in the absence of both Herring and Gareth Roderick, presumably injured. Tall 18-year-old academy opening bowler, Jamie Odell from Wexham, returned the best second innings figures for Middlesex with 3-62. Eskinazi did a fine job behind the stumps and finished with 7 victims in the match. England Under 19s man Ryan Higgins, from Harare, was the star of the Middlesex second innings as he led the home team to a comfortable win with time and wickets to spare. Support came from 22 year old Andrew Lowe (31), from Sydney, in a third wicket stand of 59 and another promising academy youngster Don Manuwelge, from West London but of Sri Lankan parentage (24*) in an unbroken fourth wicket partnership of 76. Higgins deservedly took the plaudits, however, as he reached a brilliant 100* off the final ball of the match. Garrett stood out in the field for Gloucs, taking 5 excellent catches at first slip. Readers of The Cricketer might want to know that this month's One to Watch (p99 of the July issue), 17 year old George Hankins from Millfield School, batted at 5 for Gloucs in this match and bowled some offspin, but will surely have more luck on other occasions.
The Run Out
I met up with the Professor at Headingley in June and we spent much of the day discussing and chortling over his correspondence with Douglas Miller in connection with the Run Out issue. He agreed to send me a truncated version for possible inclusion in Googlies. In the event even this turned out to be nine pages long and so I decided to exercise severe editorial prerogative.
The Professor: Douglas Miller and I have long disagreed about the Law relating to the backing-up batsman and the Buttler run-out re-ignited our combined indignation. Roughly speaking Douglas likes the law as it is (it prevents bowlers “feigning” a delivery and running out a batsman who has fractionally left his crease) and I think that batsmen should stay in their crease until the ball has been bowled.
Douglas: The law, of course, was not applied but the regulation was.
Personally I think the amendment – it is the same for ECB first-class as for ICC – is unnecessary and regrettable for two reasons:
1. Minor tweaks cause confusion – to players, umpires and commentators. Note Holding’s original comments before sense was spoken between innings.
2. By amending from delivery stride to delivery swing, a change you presumably welcome, it has been made much easier to catch a batsman going about his normal business.
The Professor: I still do not understand your position however. Why is it unsporting/unfair to run someone out but not unsporting to run a couple of yards less than you are supposed to? Is there an operational problem too? You are the experienced umpire. Is it possible to look at the back crease, checking the no-ball and, simultaneously, be looking several feet to the side (depending upon where he is standing) to check that the batsman is still in his ground? And can you also/alternatively watch the bowler’s “swing”. And when you’ve done all that, check that the ball pitches in line, etc., etc. I assume that when they change the laws/regulations (or what the TV men call “rules”) someone does ask the umpiring fraternity if it is actually possible to administer the change.
Douglas: The answer is desperately simple. On the one hand it has long been the established custom to warn a batsman before whipping off the bails – and even then it is considered a bit underhand. As evidence of this you yourself say you have never run anyone out, and there has not been an instance of it in the English county game since 1956 – and even then it was after three warnings. All this is evidence of the practice, rightly or wrongly, being almost universally regarded as unsporting. On the other hand, the batsman charging up the pitch is not regarded as unsporting because there is nothing in the law forbidding him from doing so.
The Professor: I think I have grasped the issue now...at long last. It is the opprobrium problem rather than the "legal" one which gives you so much difficulty. I had assumed you would be something of a stickler for the Laws but it seems I am (uncharacteristically) cast in that role and you are (uncharacteristically?) tied in these casuistic knots. Let's be fair, my solution is simpler: define what being in your ground is, and say what can happen if you're not. Finis. C'est tout!
King Cricket Matters
Ged writes:
Early season, I always try to take in a day of county cricket with my old friend, Charley “The Gent” Malloy. It helps us both to get over those winter withdrawal symptoms. Charley has his favourite place to sit at the start of play – “Death Row” right at the front of the Pavilion, close to but not exactly behind the wicket. By 11am, we were well set in those seats. But Charley was in thoughtful mood.
“I’m going to be very careful what I say today,” said Charley.
“Why’s that?” I asked.
“Because anything I say might end up in your King Cricket report, showing me to be the idiot and you to be the clever clogs.”
“But if you don’t say anything worth reporting at all, you know I’ll just make stuff up,” I replied. Charley laughed.
We tucked in to smoked salmon rolls (whisky smoked – the salmon, not the rolls) with a nice little Alsatian Gewürztraminer to wash them down. Later we had Parma ham in Ciabatta bread, washed down with a rather elegant albeit Australian Shiraz. Between and beyond those major courses were other tasty morsels, including honey-roasted cashews, savoury sesame cracker-thingies and some very jolly posh chocolate biscuits.
We discussed many things during the day, including my latest hobby, learning to play the baritone ukulele very badly; the latest exploits of Charley’s son and daughter; together with news of the house refurbishment carried out by Charley and Mrs Malloy over the winter.
While in the Grandstand for the middle session of the day, a chap sitting with a friend not far behind us, started to snore, increasingly loudly as the session went on. At tea, the sleeper woke up and said: “It really is lovely being with you here at Lord’s,” to which his mate replied: “I’m not sure you have entirely been with me.”
“Hmm,” said the sleeper. “I suppose I might have nodded off for a moment just then.”
At stumps, Charley wondered what I might report about him on King Cricket. “Will you tell them about me trying to remember a pint-sized cricketer who looked a bit like that little-feller on the field of play, only to discover that the little feller was the very chap I was trying to remember?”
“Unlikely to make the cut”, I replied.
“What about me not realising that your baritone ukulele is different from the instruments that George Formby used to play?” asked Charley.
“A mistake that many would make, Charley. The baritone ukulele is normally tuned as a four-stringed guitar, very different from the banjolele and conventional ukulele, but the distinction is a bit music-geeky.”
Charley and I decided not to have a final, post-stumps drink – I needed to get home and prepare for work the next day. I walked home my usual route. Three minutes from home, as I’m walking past the Prince Edward, a loud voice rings out, “Ged Ladd” (or words to that effect). “Stentor Baritone”, (or words to that effect), I reply. An extraordinary coincidence for several reasons, not least because I had never heard of a baritone ukulele, let alone a Stentor Baritone ukulele, when I granted my MCC friend that KC pseudonym some years ago. Also because Stentor no longer lives on my patch, nor does the publisher chum, also an acquaintance of mine, with whom Stentor was having an outside drink, en route to a restaurant. Being an MCC member, Stentor Baritone was naturally unaware that today had been a match day at Lord’s, nor indeed that the cricket season had even begun. Equally naturally, I joined the pair for a quick drink, leaving my work preparation to a slightly foggier, later hour.
Don Bennett
Allen Bruton sent me this
I was really sorry to hear of the death of such a great contributor to Middlesex over so many years. In 1953 I was taken to Lords by my father to see my first game of county cricket, Middlesex playing Surrey. Arriving after lunch we sat on the grass behind the boundary, most of the seating being occupied as was quite common for this fixture in the 1950’s.
Despite Denis Compton scoring a century, the memory I came away with was that of Don Bennett hitting a six over long on during an innings of 45. As a seven year old I was completely awestruck by a batsman being able to strike a ball so far, a feeling that in my case persisted throughout my playing career. However from that day he became my boyhood hero and on receipt of the Evening News or News Chronicle I would immediately check his performance.
Coincidentally in my early teens having moved to Hillingdon with my parents I soon discovered that my hero lived just a few hundred yards away. Later in my South Hampstead days, Don was our coach at the Finchley Indoor Winter Nets and would join us in the bar for a drink and chat after nets. It came as a great relief not to have my illusions shattered when finding that my boyhood hero was also a thoroughly nice bloke.
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