G&C 236
GOOGLIES & CHINAMEN
An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 236
August 2022
Spot the Ball
1.Adil Rashid: They used to say that I bowled long-hops, but I feel much better now they call them drag downs.
2.Jonathan Agnew: Do you think that you should be dropped because you are so out of form?
Jason Roy: I feel in really good touch but I am just not getting any runs.
Jonathan Agnew: That sounds like out of form to me.
3.Ben Stokes: In red ball we play “Baz Ball”
Jos Buttler: In white ball we play “Crap Cricket”
4.Reporter: Are you looking forward to the Hundred?
Man wearing an MCC tie, braces and boater: Yes, I am looking forward to it being over.
5.Jos Buttler: Twelve days of cricket in July is far too much.
Fred Trueman: After a five-day test match finished on a Tuesday, we would travel back to our counties that night ready to start a three-day match on the Wednesday. The next three-day game started on Saturday and the only rest we got was the Sunday. So, we played 26 days during the month. And, of course, we didn’t keep getting injured.
Out and About with the Professor
It’s always interesting, in my view, to be present at the debut of a new young cricketer. I saw the first-class debut of Jonny Bairstow at Headingley more than a dozen years’ ago (which I think I may have reported in this journal) and thought he looked a decent player. I recall sitting in front of the Bairstow family (no mistaking them) and they were all very nervous. The player, by contrast, although very young, seemed comparatively self-assured. At this level all young players have considerable talent but, as so often in sport, it is the temperament which sets them apart and, while not an easy thing to judge from the stands, he looked comfortable at the crease. He only got 20 or 30 in the first innings but had an 80-odd in the second and looked, as they say, “one to watch”.
So, what can be said about young Will Luxton? He is a tall right-hander who plays lots of shots (rather too many for my taste, at least early in the innings – doesn’t he know he’s playing for Yorkshire?), who made his debut at Scarborough this month. He had a good series for the England in the ICC Under 19 Cup (or whatever it was called) in the West Indies (although not as good as that of Tom Prest) and got into the Yorkshire First XI on the back of a hundred for the 2s. He got a reasonably composed 30 odd before lunch but got out to the first ball after the break. He played nicely off the front foot, appeared to have a solid defence and it was a bit of a surprise when he got out down the leg side to an off-break. He wasn’t chosen for the next game when more experienced batters were available but it will be interesting to see if his career progresses with Yorkshire. If not, of course, he may take the time-honoured route for Yorkshire cricketers of being released, joining another county, and being successful with them.
Will Luxton leaving the field followed by Adam Lyth)
Scarborough, on a sunny day, must be about one of the best venues for a first game for a Yorkshireman. It was very warm (Scarborough, in my experience, is either boiling hot or freezing cold – it doesn’t have a temperate zone) and packed with very partisan supporters – and “packed” at Scarborough means a lot of people. It holds, or so I was told, over 11,000 spectators. Not necessarily on the most comfortable of seats, indeed the terraces on the North Marine Road side just have “traditional” benches of two wooden planks. This capacity is, apparently, the biggest of any non-Test venue in the country and on a warm day, after two or three days on the beach, it presents a sought-after relief from making sandcastles. They also allow families onto the ground at lunch and tea for dozens of impromptu games of cricket; a nice touch, I think, and a long way from the preciousness of Headingley or, of course, Lord’s.
Luxton’s debut probably won’t remain in the collective Yorkshire consciousness in the way of some others. The one still spoken about by the cognoscenti in the North East Upper stand at Headingley is that of Ashley Metcalfe. It is remembered for two reasons: first, because he scored a hundred, and second, because of the reaction of his fellow opening bat. I have heard the story from more than one source, including someone who was doing a commentary on the match. Metcalfe was clearly as nervous as could be and had a truly dreadful first over: played and missed at everything except a thick edge that just failed to carry and looked likely to get out at any moment. At the end of the over his opening partner walked down the pitch to have a word. On commentary this was described as the seasoned pro passing on a few words of comfort to a very nervous debutant. At the close of play Metcalfe was asked if the words of the experienced team-mate had helped at all. “Well, not really” was apparently the reply.
“Why? What did he say?”
“He said: ‘These people have come here to watch me bat and if you can’t handle the bowling, fuck off back to the pavilion and leave it to someone who can’”.
And the name of the team-mate and other opening bat? Now come on, no Googlies reader really needs to be told that.
This & That
Its not just the England test team who have decided that big fourth innings totals can be chased down. Pakistan were set 342 to beat Sri Lanka and achieved it with four wickets in hand thanks largely to Shafique who opened and finished on 160 not out.
I didn’t see any of England’s fifth day run chase against India as I was subject to an all-day power outage. But I did see some of the fourth day and there is something going on with the pitches. There were hardly any bowlers foot marks and the surface played like a first day pitch. They must be constructing the surfaces differently which would also help to explain the big scores in the county championship. If there is not going to be deterioration, or hardly any, over five days the whole nature of test matches will change and Stokes’ position of “we like to chase” will become the norm. I tried this out on the Prof and he responded: Chatting to the WGCCC groundsman on Saturday (cricket week last week) and he felt that the fine dry weather in April allowed groundsman to be in control of preparation (rather than the weather), especially the amount of watering. Composite pitches do exist but are not used in international (possibly First Class) matches.
Perhaps the most extraordinary of the recent run chases ended up in defeat for Ireland. In the 3rd ODI at Malahide New Zealand racked up a seemingly impregnable 360 for 5. In reply Ireland reached 359 after 50 overs with Paul Stirling top scoring with 120. Harry Tector scored his second century of the series. His first came in the first match in which Ireland batted first and reached 300 for 9. Ireland looked set to win this game until Michael Bracewell scored 24 off the final over to give the Kiwis victory with a ball to spare.
In the South Africans warm up match against the England Lions they set the Lions 318 to win in their 50 overs. The Lions cruised it with thirteen overs to spare thanks to Smeed 90, Banton 57, Duckett 85 and Eskinazi 52 not out. This was Smeed’s fifth score in the nineties in white ball cricket this year.
In the County Championship runs continue to be the order of the day for the most part. In Nottinghamshire’s match against Derbyshire Ben Slater was out for 12 with the score on 46. Haseed Hameed (196) and Ben Duckett (241) then added 402 which, according to my Playfair Annual, beats the record 2nd wicket partnership for Nottinghamshire of 398 which had stood since 1890.
If you are a Leicestershire supporter there have been some welcome runs around this season and most of their big guns fired against Sussex. Patel (99), Kimber (104), Ackermann (277 not out), Mulder (235 not out) all contributed to a massive 756 for 4 dec. Ackermann and Mulder added 477 unbroken for the fifth wicket which beat the County’s previous record by 147.
Lancashire play some fixtures at out grounds whilst Old Trafford is used for international matches and this season they played Somerset at Southport. Keaton Jennings took this opportunity to score 318 and became only Lancashire's sixth triple centurion and it was the fourth highest by any Lancashire player in their history. It also matched the highest score in English cricket since Sean Dickson also hit 318 for Kent against Northants in July 2017. Surpassing Jason Gallian's 312 against Derbyshire at Old Trafford in 1996 as the previous best home score in the county, it was the highest score by any Lancashire player since Neal Fairbrother's 366 against Surrey at The Oval in 1990.
But then Sam Northeast got in on the act. He has played for Kent, Hampshire, Yorkshire and now Glamorgan but not Middlesex. He made 410 not out for Glamorgan against Leicestershire and added 461 unbroken with Chris Cooke who scored 191 not out. Their partnership was the record for any wicket for Glamorgan. It was ninth highest score ever in first class cricket and the third highest in England, behind Lara’s 501 and Archie Mclaren’s 424. It was the first quadruple in England since Graham Hick’s 405 in 1988. Northeast could no doubt have moved higher up the ranks had his skipper not declared at lunch, but that enabled Glamorgan time to bowl Leicestershire out and win the match.
I watched the T20 Blast game at Chelmsford between Essex and Glamorgan where Simon Doull was appalled at the silence that greeted any noteworthy actions by Glamorgan players. The Chelmsford crowd are renown for this appallingly unsportsmanlike behaviour which demonstrates that they are not cricket supporters but just Essex Fans. They probably support Millwall as well.
In reply to Essex’ 271 Surrey slumped 112 for 7 before Will Jacks went on to 150 not out which took his side to 319 all out. Jacks scored his third fifty from just 16 balls which included 26 from a Matt Critchley over and 23 from a Simon Harmer one.
During Warwickshire’s innings against Kent Sam Billings held seven catches behind the stumps which I assumed must be a record, but it transpired that fifteen wicket keepers in the history of the game have had eight dismissals in an innings. But only four of these took place in England. But then I noticed that he took another five in the second innings which ups the ante substantially. One keeper in the history of world cricket has made 14 dismissals, one has made 13 and Billings now joins the 7 who have made 12. This is truly the big time for Billings who I didn’t think looked particularly good when he deputised for Foakes.
One of the fun episodes of my time back in the UK has been the reaction of Derbyshire members, and in particular Dominic Cork, to Derbyshire gaining a home tie in the quarter finals of the T20 Blast. First their captain and big run scorer, Shan Masood, went back to Pakistan and then it became apparent that the Derbyshire Committee had let their ground out on the specified evening for a Michael Buble Concert. So, Derby had to travel to Taunton, their opponents’ ground for the match. Stand in skipper, Leus du Plooy, then made the catastrophic decision to invite Somerset to bat first and they then recorded the highest T20 Blast score of all time – 265 for 5, which included 18 sixes. Rossouw hit 93 from 36 balls and Lammonby 31 from 9. Extraordinarily amidst the carnage George Scrimshaw had figures of 2 for 16 from his four overs. In reply Derbyshire only managed 74 and so they suffered the worst ever T20 Blast defeat of 191 runs.
It was interesting to note the Yorkshire line up for their Quarter Final at the Oval. Despite Players away on duty with England the only dusky face in their line-up was the overseas pro, Shadab Khan. So much for Gough’s commitment to using local non-white talent.
I predict that there will be trouble for the T20 game soon. The desire to get families, youngsters, and indeed anyone including drunks to dress up and go means that attention in the crowd to the cricket is less than full and, in many cases, spasmodic. During finals day at Edgbaston the medical team had to be called to attend a woman and her child who were hit by the ball as it sailed into the crowd. From the afternoon on probably no more than half the spectators in the Hollies Stand were watching the cricket. Many of them were parading around doing the conga with their backs to the cricket. Some Health and Safety officer is going to require a Risk Assessment which rules it too dangerous to sit in the crowd and require mesh fencing to be erected to protect spectators.
Morgan Matters
The ECB's attempts to "rebrand cricket" (in the wake of the Azeem Rafiq racism scandal) have faltered after they suspended a "senior official" accused of making a racially offensive comment about Devon Malcolm.
In the Edgbaston Test S Broad was hit for 35 in one over by India no 10 Jasprit Bumrah who has a Test average of 6! It was most expensive over in Test history, the previous highest was 28)
The August Cricketer tells us that:
the ECB has charged 7 people following the investigation into allegations of racism at Yorks;
C Broad's pub in Upper Broughton was ravaged by fire during the second Test at Trent Bridge;
M Selvey thinks R Key should reduce the basic pay on a central contract and "substantially enhance the incentive to play”.
Vic Marks tells us that he is convinced that Cook and Trott tried to confuse umpires by placing the knee roll on their pads well below the knees "so as to confuse the umpire”.
Paul Edwards shudders to think that the Derbyshire match against Middlesex could be the last championship match at the ground;
Middlesex's attempts to sign overseas players Mujeeb Ur Rahman and Shaheen Shah Afridi have both fallen through, though Afridi did actually turn out for Middlesex in mid-May;
Joe Root has regained top spot in the men's ICC Test Players table;
A photo of Joni Mitchell makes a surprise appearance in the letters pages; Paul Weaver's obituary of Jim Parks calls him "Sunny Jim, the prototype wicketkeeper/batsman".
Moeen Ali is leaving Worcs at the end of the season to return to Warks.
Raheem Sterling grew up in London and played for Rs before joining Liverpool and he has now agreed to move from Man City to Chelsea for around £45m!
Indian fast bowler Umesh Yadav has joined Middlesex for the rest of the season (replacing Shaheen Afridi) and is making his debut in the Championship match v Worcester at Northwood (Merchant Taylors' School).
Galle Test: SL have beaten Oz by an innings and 39: SL 554 (Chandimal 206*, Starc 4-89), Oz 151 a/o (P Jayasuriya 6-59) no Oz batsman made more than 32.
Merchant Taylors: Middlesex 240 (Hollman 46, Yadav 44*), but Worcestershire (238-3) strolled it by 7 wickets (E Pollock 113) and a day to spare. I am glad I have retired. Tanya Aldred wrote "A Baz-balling Ed Pollock bamboozled Middlesex to set up a 7 wicket victory for Worcestershire on a capricious Merchant Taylors' pitch. His 113, in just 77 balls, included 7 sixes which crashed into various festival tents, endangering ice-creams and scorecards alike". Worcestershire 19 points Middlesex 3.
No men's England cricket tour of WI has been scheduled for at least the next 5 years.
Lord's (CC): Middlesex are having (yet another) bad day as Sussex are currently 214-2 (after 66) having been inserted... and they closed day 1 on 328-4 (Alsop 135). Tanya Aldred wrote "Middlesex's puzzling decision to bowl first against Sussex did not pay dividends at Lord's where MCC members were allowed to remove their jackets, but not their ties". What about Middlesex members?
B Stokes had a dismal farewell to ODIs taking 0-44 off 5 overs and making 5 off 11 balls... he might as well have let someone else have a game.
M Wood will have "fresh surgery" on his elbow on Saturday (23/7).
CC: at the Riverside, Middlesex chose to bowl first and Durham were 132-0 (44.5) when play was abandoned for the day. Durham are currently 346-3 (M Jones 187*). I think TSRJ is in charge of this one so "nice decision to bowl first Toby".
A report into racism in Scottish cricket has been described as "the most devastating verdict to be delivered on any sporting institution in the UK" and as "a wake-up call for all of Scottish sport" after its authors detailed 448 examples of institutional racism at Cricket Scotland.
C Woakes is having a knee operation today (28/7) in order to improve his chances of making the T20WC in Oct, which is followed by the Ashes in Oz and a Test tour of the Caribbean. M Wood, J Archer, O Stone, Saqib Mahmood and M Fisher are all recovering from injuries and operations, while O Robinson is playing his first game in over 2 months and has already taken 7 wickets in the championship match at TB.
The Hottest Day Ever
Back in the winter I got an email from George asking if I fancied watching a day’s cricket at the Cheltenham Festival. As always such events look harmless enough when they are months away. As the agreed date drew near there started to be severe weather warnings and indeed the first ever red alert was issued. I made my last trip to Chateau L’Enclos in my previous car (20 years old) which had no effective air conditioning and so my current one (nineteen years old) could only provide a more comfortable ride.
It might surprise readers to hear that I am normally highly sceptical of dire weather warnings and the advice that accompanies them. However, the admonitions of the Meteorological Office for drivers not to undertake journeys unless absolutely necessary for once paid massive dividends. I assessed that my journey to Cheltenham fell into the absolutely necessary category and I found myself, incredibly, on the M6 and M5 with very few others who had assessed their journeys similarly. My journey was hassle free and there were no traffic delays. It was almost a pleasure to be motoring on these normally intolerable highways.
By the time I arrived at L’Enclos George had already been informed that play was going to be restricted to three ninety-minute sessions with the normal lunch and tea breaks separating them. The weird bit was that these sessions were being cramped into the hottest part of the day and that close of play was scheduled for the coolest time of day. But we all know that these guys will do anything to avoid actually playing cricket. We subsequently found out that they had gone off for bad light on the second day at noon.
George was keen to watch the morning session from the shelter of the rather racy twenty first century marquees but took up a position which allowed me to enjoy the sun. A rare treat for me living in Derbyshire. However, the view of the cricket was so poor from this position that he agreed to join me on the temporary terracing for the final two sessions. In an attempt to combine a belt and braces approach to his shelter he not only effected a jaunty hat but also erected an umbrella to provide additional shade to his ageing body.
George with belt & braces
George’s umbrella was festooned with ducks but we were unable to come up with a witty anecdote relating to it.
In the morning session the splendidly named Felix Organ batted pleasantly and had scored 48 out of Hampshire’s 78 for 0 at the interval. However, he must have had a most unsatisfactory lunch since between lunch and tea he added just 9 runs. Meanwhile his partner, Ian Holland, almost caught him up before falling LBW to the loanee from Notts, Zak Chappell. This brought ex-Middlesex man, Nick Gubbins, to the crease and he played the best shots of the day before being inelegantly caught by Bracey when the ball lodged between the keeper’s pads. George had been going on about wanting to watch Vince bat and finally got his wish only for Vince to decide to play for the close from just after 4pm.
I have long since realised that it is pointless to expect anything much from watching a day of Championship cricket and this day did nothing to change this view. However, I did get to sit in the sun and also enjoyed a hassle free trip back up the motorways.
Cricket on the Beach
George sent me this
A few days ago Pauline forwarded me a photograph she has seen in the paper.
“Cricketers from the Ship Inn play against visitors the MCC. The Ship Inn pub is the only cricket team in the UK to play their matches on a beach”
I’d never heard of Elie, although there are a fair number of faintly ludicrous pictures if you look online, including one of the boundary rope being laid as the tide went out. But the reason she forwarded it was because of an unofficial match which took place at Le Pouldu beach in Brittany in 1979.
A bit of background. Our second daughter Emily was born in May 1979 and I attempted to persuade Pauline that it would be just the thing to take a three-month-old baby and her two-year-old sister camping on holiday in Brittany. Jim also decided to join us for some of the time at least as did Steve and Heather Thompson. I was already in trouble on the holiday as the object of a spurious accusation of using the baby in the cot as a wicket in a game of cricket on the campsite. (As an aside Heather remembers asking Pauline how she sterilised the baby’s feeding equipment to which the breastfeeding Pauline replied, ‘soap and water’)
Jim and Steve at the time were very high quality cricketers playing 1st Xl club cricket. It was inevitable that we would take a bat and ball down to the beach and find a hard enough piece of sand to bounce the ball on. At this distance I struggle to remember what we used as the wicket. Things started in a friendly enough way, but inevitably we found a way to make the game competitive. As I recall, the way we did this was to make the game tip and run, but you could only score runs on one side of the wicket, where the fielder was placed. So, in reality, the likeliest way to get the batsman out was run out. This resulted in quite a bit of painful diving on the sand to make the crease.
As we played, we slowly became aware that French holidaymakers were watching us completely aghast at the bizarre behaviour of these three seemingly grown-up Englishmen. The weather deteriorated, which at least saw off most of the crowd and we continued playing in light drizzle. Later we returned to the campsite covered in sand and with various slightly sore sand burns.
Pauline later declared that she had never been so relieved to get home from a holiday. And we only went camping once more after that, to a brand new pre-erected tent near Fréjus. But no cricket.
Carlin Matters
Paddy is not a cheery chappie
WGCCC is pretty weak at the moment and is very dependent on Ace Shah for big runs and is lacking in real strength in bowling and fielding. As I have said before League Cricket is for me pretty boring. In the Premier division its always the same six or seven opponents and with no Sunday cricket none of the Middlesex or Essex big sides visit anymore. Still I hope that we are not relegated.
As things nationally go I am convinced that soon there will be a franchised 5 over competition as the public gets bored with the length of the hundred ball game. Let’s get eight franchises together and have a big knock out day on one ground to decide the champions. Remember you heard it here first!
Old Danes Gathering
The tenth ODG took place at Shepherds Bush CC on Friday 29 July 2022. It was a familiar bunch of attendees and most seemed pleased to see each other. Steve Thompson made his debut and enhanced his appearance by bringing his wife, Heather, with him. It was particularly good to speak with Alf Langley who is now president at SBCC.
I enjoy a chat with Hugh Lindsay on these occasions and he finally admitted that he had captained England in his international days. However, he always points out that cricket was his first love and that he, indeed, enjoyed reading G&C. I was therefore able to introduce him to our two principal contributors over the years - The Great Jack Morgan and The Professor.
Jack and John with their fan, Hugh
As usual we are indebted to SBCC for hosting the event. We originally advertised the event as the Last ODG but many of those in attendance wanted another one and so we are provisionally planning for one in 2022.
King Cricket Matters
The following appeared on the King Cricket website
Sam Blackledge had a press pass for T20 Blast Finals Day which may or may not have been secured for the purposes of writing the following match report.
I travelled up to Birmingham from the West Country, sweating and panting. The heatwave, or excitement about what was to come?
Getting into the ground is often the hardest part. But my accreditation was all in order and I nabbed a spot in the middle of Edgbaston's big blue media box, right behind the bowler's arm.
Vithushan Ehantharajah, Matt Roller and John Etheridge were sitting in front of me, almost within touching distance. During the first semi-final George Dobell turned up, larger than life, shaking hands and cracking jokes like everyone's favourite but slightly scary uncle. I stared gormlessly at him, in the way normal people do when they come face-to-face with the Queen or Paul McCartney.
The mascot race came and went. After opening up an early lead, Lanky the Giraffe got his head stuck in a net and left the way open for Alfred the Gorilla (Gloucestershire, apparently. No, me neither) to pinch first place.
Queuing up for lunch, I said 'No, after you' to Ravi Bopara and squeezed past the not inconsiderable figure of Carlos Brathwaite.
Nerves got the better of me and I made the fatal error of choosing roast dinner over vegetarian curry. A free water bottle and reuseable coffee cup eased the pain, along with a weird 'Vitality Blast' branded biscuit which I am still not sure was wholly edible.
Eventually I plucked up the courage to say hello to Somerset's media manager, asking whether there would be interviews if they won. They didn't win.
Before the final I did a circuit of the ground. A man projectile vomited next to me round the back of the Hollies stand.
What a lovely day.
Googlies Website
All the back editions of Googlies can be found on the G&C website. There are also many photographs most of which have never appeared in Googlies.
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An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 236
August 2022
Spot the Ball
1.Adil Rashid: They used to say that I bowled long-hops, but I feel much better now they call them drag downs.
2.Jonathan Agnew: Do you think that you should be dropped because you are so out of form?
Jason Roy: I feel in really good touch but I am just not getting any runs.
Jonathan Agnew: That sounds like out of form to me.
3.Ben Stokes: In red ball we play “Baz Ball”
Jos Buttler: In white ball we play “Crap Cricket”
4.Reporter: Are you looking forward to the Hundred?
Man wearing an MCC tie, braces and boater: Yes, I am looking forward to it being over.
5.Jos Buttler: Twelve days of cricket in July is far too much.
Fred Trueman: After a five-day test match finished on a Tuesday, we would travel back to our counties that night ready to start a three-day match on the Wednesday. The next three-day game started on Saturday and the only rest we got was the Sunday. So, we played 26 days during the month. And, of course, we didn’t keep getting injured.
Out and About with the Professor
It’s always interesting, in my view, to be present at the debut of a new young cricketer. I saw the first-class debut of Jonny Bairstow at Headingley more than a dozen years’ ago (which I think I may have reported in this journal) and thought he looked a decent player. I recall sitting in front of the Bairstow family (no mistaking them) and they were all very nervous. The player, by contrast, although very young, seemed comparatively self-assured. At this level all young players have considerable talent but, as so often in sport, it is the temperament which sets them apart and, while not an easy thing to judge from the stands, he looked comfortable at the crease. He only got 20 or 30 in the first innings but had an 80-odd in the second and looked, as they say, “one to watch”.
So, what can be said about young Will Luxton? He is a tall right-hander who plays lots of shots (rather too many for my taste, at least early in the innings – doesn’t he know he’s playing for Yorkshire?), who made his debut at Scarborough this month. He had a good series for the England in the ICC Under 19 Cup (or whatever it was called) in the West Indies (although not as good as that of Tom Prest) and got into the Yorkshire First XI on the back of a hundred for the 2s. He got a reasonably composed 30 odd before lunch but got out to the first ball after the break. He played nicely off the front foot, appeared to have a solid defence and it was a bit of a surprise when he got out down the leg side to an off-break. He wasn’t chosen for the next game when more experienced batters were available but it will be interesting to see if his career progresses with Yorkshire. If not, of course, he may take the time-honoured route for Yorkshire cricketers of being released, joining another county, and being successful with them.
Will Luxton leaving the field followed by Adam Lyth)
Scarborough, on a sunny day, must be about one of the best venues for a first game for a Yorkshireman. It was very warm (Scarborough, in my experience, is either boiling hot or freezing cold – it doesn’t have a temperate zone) and packed with very partisan supporters – and “packed” at Scarborough means a lot of people. It holds, or so I was told, over 11,000 spectators. Not necessarily on the most comfortable of seats, indeed the terraces on the North Marine Road side just have “traditional” benches of two wooden planks. This capacity is, apparently, the biggest of any non-Test venue in the country and on a warm day, after two or three days on the beach, it presents a sought-after relief from making sandcastles. They also allow families onto the ground at lunch and tea for dozens of impromptu games of cricket; a nice touch, I think, and a long way from the preciousness of Headingley or, of course, Lord’s.
Luxton’s debut probably won’t remain in the collective Yorkshire consciousness in the way of some others. The one still spoken about by the cognoscenti in the North East Upper stand at Headingley is that of Ashley Metcalfe. It is remembered for two reasons: first, because he scored a hundred, and second, because of the reaction of his fellow opening bat. I have heard the story from more than one source, including someone who was doing a commentary on the match. Metcalfe was clearly as nervous as could be and had a truly dreadful first over: played and missed at everything except a thick edge that just failed to carry and looked likely to get out at any moment. At the end of the over his opening partner walked down the pitch to have a word. On commentary this was described as the seasoned pro passing on a few words of comfort to a very nervous debutant. At the close of play Metcalfe was asked if the words of the experienced team-mate had helped at all. “Well, not really” was apparently the reply.
“Why? What did he say?”
“He said: ‘These people have come here to watch me bat and if you can’t handle the bowling, fuck off back to the pavilion and leave it to someone who can’”.
And the name of the team-mate and other opening bat? Now come on, no Googlies reader really needs to be told that.
This & That
Its not just the England test team who have decided that big fourth innings totals can be chased down. Pakistan were set 342 to beat Sri Lanka and achieved it with four wickets in hand thanks largely to Shafique who opened and finished on 160 not out.
I didn’t see any of England’s fifth day run chase against India as I was subject to an all-day power outage. But I did see some of the fourth day and there is something going on with the pitches. There were hardly any bowlers foot marks and the surface played like a first day pitch. They must be constructing the surfaces differently which would also help to explain the big scores in the county championship. If there is not going to be deterioration, or hardly any, over five days the whole nature of test matches will change and Stokes’ position of “we like to chase” will become the norm. I tried this out on the Prof and he responded: Chatting to the WGCCC groundsman on Saturday (cricket week last week) and he felt that the fine dry weather in April allowed groundsman to be in control of preparation (rather than the weather), especially the amount of watering. Composite pitches do exist but are not used in international (possibly First Class) matches.
Perhaps the most extraordinary of the recent run chases ended up in defeat for Ireland. In the 3rd ODI at Malahide New Zealand racked up a seemingly impregnable 360 for 5. In reply Ireland reached 359 after 50 overs with Paul Stirling top scoring with 120. Harry Tector scored his second century of the series. His first came in the first match in which Ireland batted first and reached 300 for 9. Ireland looked set to win this game until Michael Bracewell scored 24 off the final over to give the Kiwis victory with a ball to spare.
In the South Africans warm up match against the England Lions they set the Lions 318 to win in their 50 overs. The Lions cruised it with thirteen overs to spare thanks to Smeed 90, Banton 57, Duckett 85 and Eskinazi 52 not out. This was Smeed’s fifth score in the nineties in white ball cricket this year.
In the County Championship runs continue to be the order of the day for the most part. In Nottinghamshire’s match against Derbyshire Ben Slater was out for 12 with the score on 46. Haseed Hameed (196) and Ben Duckett (241) then added 402 which, according to my Playfair Annual, beats the record 2nd wicket partnership for Nottinghamshire of 398 which had stood since 1890.
If you are a Leicestershire supporter there have been some welcome runs around this season and most of their big guns fired against Sussex. Patel (99), Kimber (104), Ackermann (277 not out), Mulder (235 not out) all contributed to a massive 756 for 4 dec. Ackermann and Mulder added 477 unbroken for the fifth wicket which beat the County’s previous record by 147.
Lancashire play some fixtures at out grounds whilst Old Trafford is used for international matches and this season they played Somerset at Southport. Keaton Jennings took this opportunity to score 318 and became only Lancashire's sixth triple centurion and it was the fourth highest by any Lancashire player in their history. It also matched the highest score in English cricket since Sean Dickson also hit 318 for Kent against Northants in July 2017. Surpassing Jason Gallian's 312 against Derbyshire at Old Trafford in 1996 as the previous best home score in the county, it was the highest score by any Lancashire player since Neal Fairbrother's 366 against Surrey at The Oval in 1990.
But then Sam Northeast got in on the act. He has played for Kent, Hampshire, Yorkshire and now Glamorgan but not Middlesex. He made 410 not out for Glamorgan against Leicestershire and added 461 unbroken with Chris Cooke who scored 191 not out. Their partnership was the record for any wicket for Glamorgan. It was ninth highest score ever in first class cricket and the third highest in England, behind Lara’s 501 and Archie Mclaren’s 424. It was the first quadruple in England since Graham Hick’s 405 in 1988. Northeast could no doubt have moved higher up the ranks had his skipper not declared at lunch, but that enabled Glamorgan time to bowl Leicestershire out and win the match.
I watched the T20 Blast game at Chelmsford between Essex and Glamorgan where Simon Doull was appalled at the silence that greeted any noteworthy actions by Glamorgan players. The Chelmsford crowd are renown for this appallingly unsportsmanlike behaviour which demonstrates that they are not cricket supporters but just Essex Fans. They probably support Millwall as well.
In reply to Essex’ 271 Surrey slumped 112 for 7 before Will Jacks went on to 150 not out which took his side to 319 all out. Jacks scored his third fifty from just 16 balls which included 26 from a Matt Critchley over and 23 from a Simon Harmer one.
During Warwickshire’s innings against Kent Sam Billings held seven catches behind the stumps which I assumed must be a record, but it transpired that fifteen wicket keepers in the history of the game have had eight dismissals in an innings. But only four of these took place in England. But then I noticed that he took another five in the second innings which ups the ante substantially. One keeper in the history of world cricket has made 14 dismissals, one has made 13 and Billings now joins the 7 who have made 12. This is truly the big time for Billings who I didn’t think looked particularly good when he deputised for Foakes.
One of the fun episodes of my time back in the UK has been the reaction of Derbyshire members, and in particular Dominic Cork, to Derbyshire gaining a home tie in the quarter finals of the T20 Blast. First their captain and big run scorer, Shan Masood, went back to Pakistan and then it became apparent that the Derbyshire Committee had let their ground out on the specified evening for a Michael Buble Concert. So, Derby had to travel to Taunton, their opponents’ ground for the match. Stand in skipper, Leus du Plooy, then made the catastrophic decision to invite Somerset to bat first and they then recorded the highest T20 Blast score of all time – 265 for 5, which included 18 sixes. Rossouw hit 93 from 36 balls and Lammonby 31 from 9. Extraordinarily amidst the carnage George Scrimshaw had figures of 2 for 16 from his four overs. In reply Derbyshire only managed 74 and so they suffered the worst ever T20 Blast defeat of 191 runs.
It was interesting to note the Yorkshire line up for their Quarter Final at the Oval. Despite Players away on duty with England the only dusky face in their line-up was the overseas pro, Shadab Khan. So much for Gough’s commitment to using local non-white talent.
I predict that there will be trouble for the T20 game soon. The desire to get families, youngsters, and indeed anyone including drunks to dress up and go means that attention in the crowd to the cricket is less than full and, in many cases, spasmodic. During finals day at Edgbaston the medical team had to be called to attend a woman and her child who were hit by the ball as it sailed into the crowd. From the afternoon on probably no more than half the spectators in the Hollies Stand were watching the cricket. Many of them were parading around doing the conga with their backs to the cricket. Some Health and Safety officer is going to require a Risk Assessment which rules it too dangerous to sit in the crowd and require mesh fencing to be erected to protect spectators.
Morgan Matters
The ECB's attempts to "rebrand cricket" (in the wake of the Azeem Rafiq racism scandal) have faltered after they suspended a "senior official" accused of making a racially offensive comment about Devon Malcolm.
In the Edgbaston Test S Broad was hit for 35 in one over by India no 10 Jasprit Bumrah who has a Test average of 6! It was most expensive over in Test history, the previous highest was 28)
The August Cricketer tells us that:
the ECB has charged 7 people following the investigation into allegations of racism at Yorks;
C Broad's pub in Upper Broughton was ravaged by fire during the second Test at Trent Bridge;
M Selvey thinks R Key should reduce the basic pay on a central contract and "substantially enhance the incentive to play”.
Vic Marks tells us that he is convinced that Cook and Trott tried to confuse umpires by placing the knee roll on their pads well below the knees "so as to confuse the umpire”.
Paul Edwards shudders to think that the Derbyshire match against Middlesex could be the last championship match at the ground;
Middlesex's attempts to sign overseas players Mujeeb Ur Rahman and Shaheen Shah Afridi have both fallen through, though Afridi did actually turn out for Middlesex in mid-May;
Joe Root has regained top spot in the men's ICC Test Players table;
A photo of Joni Mitchell makes a surprise appearance in the letters pages; Paul Weaver's obituary of Jim Parks calls him "Sunny Jim, the prototype wicketkeeper/batsman".
Moeen Ali is leaving Worcs at the end of the season to return to Warks.
Raheem Sterling grew up in London and played for Rs before joining Liverpool and he has now agreed to move from Man City to Chelsea for around £45m!
Indian fast bowler Umesh Yadav has joined Middlesex for the rest of the season (replacing Shaheen Afridi) and is making his debut in the Championship match v Worcester at Northwood (Merchant Taylors' School).
Galle Test: SL have beaten Oz by an innings and 39: SL 554 (Chandimal 206*, Starc 4-89), Oz 151 a/o (P Jayasuriya 6-59) no Oz batsman made more than 32.
Merchant Taylors: Middlesex 240 (Hollman 46, Yadav 44*), but Worcestershire (238-3) strolled it by 7 wickets (E Pollock 113) and a day to spare. I am glad I have retired. Tanya Aldred wrote "A Baz-balling Ed Pollock bamboozled Middlesex to set up a 7 wicket victory for Worcestershire on a capricious Merchant Taylors' pitch. His 113, in just 77 balls, included 7 sixes which crashed into various festival tents, endangering ice-creams and scorecards alike". Worcestershire 19 points Middlesex 3.
No men's England cricket tour of WI has been scheduled for at least the next 5 years.
Lord's (CC): Middlesex are having (yet another) bad day as Sussex are currently 214-2 (after 66) having been inserted... and they closed day 1 on 328-4 (Alsop 135). Tanya Aldred wrote "Middlesex's puzzling decision to bowl first against Sussex did not pay dividends at Lord's where MCC members were allowed to remove their jackets, but not their ties". What about Middlesex members?
B Stokes had a dismal farewell to ODIs taking 0-44 off 5 overs and making 5 off 11 balls... he might as well have let someone else have a game.
M Wood will have "fresh surgery" on his elbow on Saturday (23/7).
CC: at the Riverside, Middlesex chose to bowl first and Durham were 132-0 (44.5) when play was abandoned for the day. Durham are currently 346-3 (M Jones 187*). I think TSRJ is in charge of this one so "nice decision to bowl first Toby".
A report into racism in Scottish cricket has been described as "the most devastating verdict to be delivered on any sporting institution in the UK" and as "a wake-up call for all of Scottish sport" after its authors detailed 448 examples of institutional racism at Cricket Scotland.
C Woakes is having a knee operation today (28/7) in order to improve his chances of making the T20WC in Oct, which is followed by the Ashes in Oz and a Test tour of the Caribbean. M Wood, J Archer, O Stone, Saqib Mahmood and M Fisher are all recovering from injuries and operations, while O Robinson is playing his first game in over 2 months and has already taken 7 wickets in the championship match at TB.
The Hottest Day Ever
Back in the winter I got an email from George asking if I fancied watching a day’s cricket at the Cheltenham Festival. As always such events look harmless enough when they are months away. As the agreed date drew near there started to be severe weather warnings and indeed the first ever red alert was issued. I made my last trip to Chateau L’Enclos in my previous car (20 years old) which had no effective air conditioning and so my current one (nineteen years old) could only provide a more comfortable ride.
It might surprise readers to hear that I am normally highly sceptical of dire weather warnings and the advice that accompanies them. However, the admonitions of the Meteorological Office for drivers not to undertake journeys unless absolutely necessary for once paid massive dividends. I assessed that my journey to Cheltenham fell into the absolutely necessary category and I found myself, incredibly, on the M6 and M5 with very few others who had assessed their journeys similarly. My journey was hassle free and there were no traffic delays. It was almost a pleasure to be motoring on these normally intolerable highways.
By the time I arrived at L’Enclos George had already been informed that play was going to be restricted to three ninety-minute sessions with the normal lunch and tea breaks separating them. The weird bit was that these sessions were being cramped into the hottest part of the day and that close of play was scheduled for the coolest time of day. But we all know that these guys will do anything to avoid actually playing cricket. We subsequently found out that they had gone off for bad light on the second day at noon.
George was keen to watch the morning session from the shelter of the rather racy twenty first century marquees but took up a position which allowed me to enjoy the sun. A rare treat for me living in Derbyshire. However, the view of the cricket was so poor from this position that he agreed to join me on the temporary terracing for the final two sessions. In an attempt to combine a belt and braces approach to his shelter he not only effected a jaunty hat but also erected an umbrella to provide additional shade to his ageing body.
George with belt & braces
George’s umbrella was festooned with ducks but we were unable to come up with a witty anecdote relating to it.
In the morning session the splendidly named Felix Organ batted pleasantly and had scored 48 out of Hampshire’s 78 for 0 at the interval. However, he must have had a most unsatisfactory lunch since between lunch and tea he added just 9 runs. Meanwhile his partner, Ian Holland, almost caught him up before falling LBW to the loanee from Notts, Zak Chappell. This brought ex-Middlesex man, Nick Gubbins, to the crease and he played the best shots of the day before being inelegantly caught by Bracey when the ball lodged between the keeper’s pads. George had been going on about wanting to watch Vince bat and finally got his wish only for Vince to decide to play for the close from just after 4pm.
I have long since realised that it is pointless to expect anything much from watching a day of Championship cricket and this day did nothing to change this view. However, I did get to sit in the sun and also enjoyed a hassle free trip back up the motorways.
Cricket on the Beach
George sent me this
A few days ago Pauline forwarded me a photograph she has seen in the paper.
“Cricketers from the Ship Inn play against visitors the MCC. The Ship Inn pub is the only cricket team in the UK to play their matches on a beach”
I’d never heard of Elie, although there are a fair number of faintly ludicrous pictures if you look online, including one of the boundary rope being laid as the tide went out. But the reason she forwarded it was because of an unofficial match which took place at Le Pouldu beach in Brittany in 1979.
A bit of background. Our second daughter Emily was born in May 1979 and I attempted to persuade Pauline that it would be just the thing to take a three-month-old baby and her two-year-old sister camping on holiday in Brittany. Jim also decided to join us for some of the time at least as did Steve and Heather Thompson. I was already in trouble on the holiday as the object of a spurious accusation of using the baby in the cot as a wicket in a game of cricket on the campsite. (As an aside Heather remembers asking Pauline how she sterilised the baby’s feeding equipment to which the breastfeeding Pauline replied, ‘soap and water’)
Jim and Steve at the time were very high quality cricketers playing 1st Xl club cricket. It was inevitable that we would take a bat and ball down to the beach and find a hard enough piece of sand to bounce the ball on. At this distance I struggle to remember what we used as the wicket. Things started in a friendly enough way, but inevitably we found a way to make the game competitive. As I recall, the way we did this was to make the game tip and run, but you could only score runs on one side of the wicket, where the fielder was placed. So, in reality, the likeliest way to get the batsman out was run out. This resulted in quite a bit of painful diving on the sand to make the crease.
As we played, we slowly became aware that French holidaymakers were watching us completely aghast at the bizarre behaviour of these three seemingly grown-up Englishmen. The weather deteriorated, which at least saw off most of the crowd and we continued playing in light drizzle. Later we returned to the campsite covered in sand and with various slightly sore sand burns.
Pauline later declared that she had never been so relieved to get home from a holiday. And we only went camping once more after that, to a brand new pre-erected tent near Fréjus. But no cricket.
Carlin Matters
Paddy is not a cheery chappie
WGCCC is pretty weak at the moment and is very dependent on Ace Shah for big runs and is lacking in real strength in bowling and fielding. As I have said before League Cricket is for me pretty boring. In the Premier division its always the same six or seven opponents and with no Sunday cricket none of the Middlesex or Essex big sides visit anymore. Still I hope that we are not relegated.
As things nationally go I am convinced that soon there will be a franchised 5 over competition as the public gets bored with the length of the hundred ball game. Let’s get eight franchises together and have a big knock out day on one ground to decide the champions. Remember you heard it here first!
Old Danes Gathering
The tenth ODG took place at Shepherds Bush CC on Friday 29 July 2022. It was a familiar bunch of attendees and most seemed pleased to see each other. Steve Thompson made his debut and enhanced his appearance by bringing his wife, Heather, with him. It was particularly good to speak with Alf Langley who is now president at SBCC.
I enjoy a chat with Hugh Lindsay on these occasions and he finally admitted that he had captained England in his international days. However, he always points out that cricket was his first love and that he, indeed, enjoyed reading G&C. I was therefore able to introduce him to our two principal contributors over the years - The Great Jack Morgan and The Professor.
Jack and John with their fan, Hugh
As usual we are indebted to SBCC for hosting the event. We originally advertised the event as the Last ODG but many of those in attendance wanted another one and so we are provisionally planning for one in 2022.
King Cricket Matters
The following appeared on the King Cricket website
Sam Blackledge had a press pass for T20 Blast Finals Day which may or may not have been secured for the purposes of writing the following match report.
I travelled up to Birmingham from the West Country, sweating and panting. The heatwave, or excitement about what was to come?
Getting into the ground is often the hardest part. But my accreditation was all in order and I nabbed a spot in the middle of Edgbaston's big blue media box, right behind the bowler's arm.
Vithushan Ehantharajah, Matt Roller and John Etheridge were sitting in front of me, almost within touching distance. During the first semi-final George Dobell turned up, larger than life, shaking hands and cracking jokes like everyone's favourite but slightly scary uncle. I stared gormlessly at him, in the way normal people do when they come face-to-face with the Queen or Paul McCartney.
The mascot race came and went. After opening up an early lead, Lanky the Giraffe got his head stuck in a net and left the way open for Alfred the Gorilla (Gloucestershire, apparently. No, me neither) to pinch first place.
Queuing up for lunch, I said 'No, after you' to Ravi Bopara and squeezed past the not inconsiderable figure of Carlos Brathwaite.
Nerves got the better of me and I made the fatal error of choosing roast dinner over vegetarian curry. A free water bottle and reuseable coffee cup eased the pain, along with a weird 'Vitality Blast' branded biscuit which I am still not sure was wholly edible.
Eventually I plucked up the courage to say hello to Somerset's media manager, asking whether there would be interviews if they won. They didn't win.
Before the final I did a circuit of the ground. A man projectile vomited next to me round the back of the Hollies stand.
What a lovely day.
Googlies Website
All the back editions of Googlies can be found on the G&C website. There are also many photographs most of which have never appeared in Googlies.
www.googliesandchinamen.com
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