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GOOGLIES & CHINAMEN
An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 222
June 2021
Caption Competition
Rob Key: Well, is it Stuart Law? After all he drove the World’s Number 1 batsman away to Yorkshire.
Gus Fraser: No Stuart has become a good mate and is a fine leader.
Rob Key: Well that only leaves one answer, doesn’t it?
Gus Fraser: Err, what can you mean? Surely not? I am critical to the success of this famous club and am jolly and well loved. Aren’t I….?
Out and About
The Professor has finally abandoned his sofa
The return of “crowds” to county cricket could only mean one thing – a trip across the Pennines, deep into enemy territory, to watch Keaton Jennings practice his forward defensive. He is good at the forward defensive; he plays it very well…and very often. He took around 150 balls to get to 40 and many of those deliveries were met by the Keaton forward defensive. By contrast, the Yorkshire top order seem to be somewhat deficient in the stroke, as the scorecard of 21-6 in the first innings readily confirmed.
At times this match between the two unbeaten sides in this division didn’t seem a very even contest at all. Jennings’ practice session in the middle paid a handsome dividend, of course. After his careful 40, and especially
Keaton Jennings before lunch
after lunch, he was decidedly more expansive, particularly through extra-cover, a stroke which is, as it should be, really a forward defensive shot with a follow through. Towards the end he even got out the reverse sweep against Bess and it looked a most accomplished innings with scarcely an error. It was something of a surprise when on 114 he snicked the ball to slip.
Keaton Jennings after lunch
I recall seeing one of Jennings’ early matches at Headingley when he was with Durham. He looked, or so I thought, like a natural opening batsman. Indeed I thought he had ideal characteristics for an England opener: played the ball late, left well outside the off stump… and was born in South Africa. Googlies readers will remember his hundred on debut for England in Mumbai and the subsequent ups and downs of his Test career. Might he, like Hameed, get another go? I suppose, if he keeps rattling off hundreds like this one, a recall might be a possibility. Curiously, for an opening bat, he has a reputation as a fine player of spin (I guess a century in Mumbai does that) rather than someone who can deal well with the quicks where, in a few of his 17 Tests, he has looked frozen to the spot.
There were a few other performances that were of interest. Bess bowled quite tidily for a couple of longish spells, without looking like taking too many (or indeed any) wickets, only going for 10 from his first 10 overs. The comparison with the tripe he bowled in India (and, in truth, Sri Lanka) was striking. How you can bowl spin well at Old Trafford but not on an exploding pitch in India, I couldn’t say – I wonder if he knows. He took a bit of tap when Vilas decided to belt him over long-on, but 29 overs for 79 is not too dusty. It was difficult to see what he was doing with the ball from where we were sitting.
The Old Trafford authorities had closed half the ground (the nets side) and so the few hundred or so in the “crowd” were nicely socially distanced to the left of the pavilion in what used to be the Brain Statham end. The trouble was that with the care and concern for spectator enjoyment so often to the fore in the plans of cricket administrators, the pitch was on the closed side of the square. The boundary was some 15 yards in from where we were all sitting, and the pitch in the middle distance. There were replays on the screen but the person in charge of this facility seemed to choose them at random so it was not that useful. To add to the general feeling of the bizarre, the match was live-streamed on YouTube so I could watch it on my phone with about a 30 seconds delay. All very odd.
Duanne Olivier (“Ol-iff-ee-ah” remember) bowled quite quickly but also without any great penetration. He came to Yorkshire (reportedly on a £150,000-a-season contract) with a reputation as a lightning quick bowler who would serve his time as a potential England player. I saw his first game at Leeds against the Universities, and while he is undoubtedly quick, he has yet to lay waste to county batting orders.
The other player of interest (to me) was Harry Duke. The almost permanent absence of all the England players (Bairstow, Root, Rashid, Malan, Willey) has given opportunities, as they say, for young players “to come through”. One of those has been the Harrogate-born Jon Tattersall. Starting out as a leg-break bowler he was released by Yorkshire only to go away and reinvent himself as a ‘keeper. He has played well for a couple of seasons but this year the runs have dried up and he has been replaced by a child. Duke is small and agile and, as far as I could tell (since very little got passed the bat), seemed up to the job. Yorkshire have in the past fielded a schoolboy wicketkeeper in the first team (he told the Press that he was delighted to have missed double maths) but Duke looks even younger. Since he was the only one in the Yorkshire first innings to have made it to 50, the selectors look to have got it right, for once.
Given that summer has arrived in the north there can, surely, only be one result here and, in truth, Yorkshire didn’t look like championship material. The bowling looks pretty similar: all right arm quickish (with the exception of Bess) between 80 and 90 mph and, in the absence of the above (and Gary Balance), the batting doesn’t look too strong either. Indeed with the first six wickets falling for 21, “not too strong” might be regarded as something of an understatement. Defeat to the Red Rose, the first in some years, now looks inevitable.
This and That
Playing for Kent against Glamorgan Darren Stevens, now 45, came in with the score 80 for 5 which soon became 94 for 7. Undeterred Stevens hit 15 fours and 15 sixes in a score of 190 from 145 balls. He added 166 for the ninth wicket with Miguel Cummins who contributed just one run. I saw him bat at Hove on a visit with Jack Morgan and Jim Revier when he scored a hundred when he was still with Leicestershire. He seemed to take a fancy to Ollie Rayner that day who was still with Sussex.
Last Saturday I had to go to get a Covid test before this week’s trip to Chicago. When I got home I turned on Sky cricket and was surprised to see coverage of the Surrey v Middlesex match from the Oval. Surprising because Middlesex were covered a few days earlier in their match against Gloucestershire. Also surprising in that Middlesex are such a poor watch. On the Saturday only John Simpson played with any conviction whilst Jordan Clark took wickets with full tosses and wide half volleys. It looked like men against boys which was emphasized as Burns and Stoneman increased their lead effortlessly before the close.
I didn’t watch the pre-lunch session on Sunday but Surrey only lost two wickets and after Middlesex lost both openers Gubbins and Handscomb played with ease through the afternoon and it looked as if they would pull off an unlikely winning chase. However, there was then a rain break which lost five overs and took the required run rate up to nearly 10. Middlesex then lost a flurry of wickets in a mad couple of overs before settling for a draw.
Handscomb scored his first runs in this innings having gone into the match with an average of 7. He seems to have a normal looking haircut at the sides and on top but for some inexplicable reason has ten inches hanging below his cap at the back. This is a hirsute version of the bandanas utilised by the Foreign Legion or indeed Chris Gayle. You might be able to get away with such idiosyncrasies when things are going well for you but just look a prat when they aren’t.
It is interesting that the English press has been outraged that the BCCI applied to have one of this year’s tests against England cancelled so that they could fit in somewhere the remaining matches from this year’s IPL. They haven’t got it yet that the big force in World cricket is India and that their main competition, the IPL, is the biggest event in the cricket world. The Ashes may be dear to the English but not to anyone else much. The English may lead the world in Soccer at least at club level with the Premiership but cricket is continuing to fall away as the authorities flail around this year with four major (or not so major) competitions.
Has the UK’s most loathed man suddenly become a hero? Cumming’s confirming the dirt on the UK’s appalling leadership and government may actually do some good and reminds everyone of the genocide carried out last year in the care homes. It is also useful that he pointed out that there is something seriously broken in a democracy that leaves the voting public with a choice between Johnson and Corbyn.
Morgan Matters
In the May Cricketer, George Dobell writes "the Hundred is like a turd in a swimming pool", "county cricket is at the bottom of the scrapheap" and "the counties are fourth in line of priority behind England, the IPL and the Hundred". Jon Ryan (ex-sports editor of the Sunday Telegraph) says that "Alec may have been one of England's greatest Test bowlers, but Eric Bedser was always the king of the twins". Mike Jakeman says: "if the ECB are paying players a salary and players are also getting money from the IPL, it does not stand to reason that they are always rested from England duty and never from any other cricket". Who is the most dominant side in cricket history? Melinda Farrell says it is Meg Lanning's all-conquering Australians. I had not heard that Derek Ufton of Kent (cricket), Charlton and England (football) had died in March aged 93.
J Anderson will be 39 in July, but he assures us that he has no thoughts of retirement.
Middlesex matters: TSRJ is having surgery today on a torn cartilage in his knee and is likely to miss "much of the season" so J Harris makes a quick return after his short spell with Glam.
Tanya says that J Bracey "skipped to a pretty 74 at Lord's", I'm not sure whether he skipped or not or whether it was pretty, but it was actually 75.
Lord's: Mx 152 a/o (N Gubbins 52, J Simpson 40 and only 2 others sneaked into double figures, D Payne 6-56) Glo are 38-1 needing only 52 more. I am almost glad that I do not have to go any more. There has been no play yet in any of the other 7 games, but play is due to start at the Bowl at 5.30... but they only had a handful of overs and H were 110-4 when the rain returned. As expected, G strolled to victory by 7 wickets, 2 wickets to Bamber and one for Harris, Middlesex chuck out T Lace finished on 31*. Tanya tells us that "David Payne skedaddled through the Middlesex defences to pocket 11 wickets in the match, a career best...there was time for Thilan Walallawita to bash Payne into the Grandstand for six" and for "a delightful cameo from Tom Lace who, with great delicacy, cover drove, cut, clipped and nudged his way to an unbeaten 31 against his old club".
Last game of the season: Rs beat Luton 3-1 and drew level with Cardiff on 68 points, but Cardiff's goal difference was better, so they finished eighth and we were ninth (and 4 points clear of Middlesbro' in tenth), which is not too bad considering how awful it was looking in early season.
A Giles says the IPL's planned restart in Sept is likely not to include England players as they have international commitments. AG also says that Eng may use the upcoming series v NZ to look at some "new faces" and A Martin thinks he means eg J Bracey and O Robinson.
The ECB has lost £16.1m in the last year and, of course, is blaming the dreaded virus.
C Silverwood will sit out the 6 ODIs v SL and Pak in July with assistants P Collingwood and G Thorpe taking charge.
Another brilliant day for Middlesex at Lord's: H 208 (K Barker 84, T Murts 3-48, E Bamber 3-55), Middlesex 101 (P Handscomb 24, he was one of only 3 to reach double figures, Harris 16 and Cullen 11 were the others, K Abbott 5-41). H need 66 to win, with the innings about to start... and, of course, they won easily by 7 wickets, Murtagh 2-29. Tanya said that "once again Middlesex's batting proved flaky" and they "staggered to 101 in their second innings".
There are worries about the fitness of J Archer who did not bowl a ball on the last day and bowled left arm spin in the warm up. Sussex said "he has a recurrence of his elbow problem and is currently unable to bowl". He has now been ruled out of next month's 2 Tests v NZ. B Stokes (broken finger) has also been ruled out of those Tests, while C Woakes, J Buttler, S Curran and Moeen A are "set to be spared an immediate return to the biosecure bubble".
Middlesex have "amassed" an incredible 44 points from their 6 matches. Astonishingly, this is not the worst in the country as Derbyshire have 41, and Leicestershire 40. However, both of those have a game in hand, but nobody can equal Middlesex's record of 5 defeats, no other county has more than 3.
C Rushworth is now Durham's leading wicket-taker with 528, overtaking G Onions.
S Broad has stated that ex-national selector E Smith never rated him so he is quite happy to see Smith depart from selection duties. How can you not rate someone who has 517 wickets in 144 Tests? Cf: I Botham 383, R Willis 325, F Trueman 307 and D Underwood 297? The only Englishman above him is, of course, J Anderson (606).
The 21/22 Ashes tour is going to look fairly strange with i) host venues being "rejigged"; ii) no warm-up games against local opposition; and iii) the possibility that there will be no travelling support. This has been caused by i) the T20 WC which runs until mid-November; and ii) the likely 14 day quarantine period on arrival. Why let that sort of bollocks affect an Ashes series, which should surely take priority over T20 crap? The dates of the Tests are: 8-12/12, Brisbane; 16-20/12 Adelaide (day/ nighter); 26-30/12 Melbourne; 5-9/1 Sydney; and 14-18/1 Perth.
Middlesex have re-signed Paul Stirling for (part of) their T20 season. He replaces Mitchell Marsh, who has been called up for the Oz white ball tour of WI in July. Another signing is expected for the remainder of the season.
J Archer is expected to have an op on his troublesome elbow possibly as soon as tomorrow, but then an 8 week lay-off is probable.
India have asked England to move this summer's 5th Test (scheduled for Sept) or even cancel it altogether, because it clashes with some T20 rubbish (IPL I think). The ECB is expected to "hold its ground".
Middlesex have signed Kiwi allrounder Daryl Mitchell for the final 9 group matches of the T20 (you will recall that P Stirling has been signed for the first 5 matches).
Oval: Middlesex finished on 250-6 (Roach 5-86), 40 short, not a bad effort considering how useless they have been this season. Tanya wrote: "rain and bad light squalled over the ground at a crucial moment, leaving them to chase 74 in 8 overs with every man on the boundary".
Ex-Middlesex allrounder (we should never have let him go) Gareth Berg has signed a new contract with N'hants until the end of the 2022 season. GB is averaging 44 with the bat in the Championship this year and took career best match bowling figures of 9-90 v Sx earlier this month.
The final game of this season is the 5-day Bob Willis Trophy match, which is scheduled to finish on October 2nd!
Today's G has a large photo of 6 Yorkshire men (bowler, keeper and 4 slips) all screaming their heads off and all with arms raised appealing for an lbw against an un-named Glamorgan batsman, but we can see from the photo that the ball is missing leg stump by a considerable margin!
Andy Bull urges us to enjoy the last week (for quite a while) of County Championship cricket, which started today, because it is almost time for the dreaded Hundred to wipe the smiles off our faces. The Hundred players have apparently been working on adverts and other Hundred nonsense at a "makeshift studio in Twickenham".
Former Test bowlers D Malcolm and D Headley have been offered opportunities to become match referees... because they are black! Somebody suddenly noticed that there was a distinct lack of non-white officials almost throughout the ECB when J Holder and I Dawood made allegations of discrimination.
Grace Rd: How embarrassing! Middlesex lose to useless Leicestershire, by 5 wickets.
Molloy Matters
Ken Molloy sent me this
One of the criticisms levelled at Levy, for example-and there are many others, is his reluctance to spend money in the transfer market but the reality is that while a high-priced player like Messi or Ronaldo may help bring success to a club the best signings are often players who do not cost a fortune but suddenly blossom at the new club
Reading the comments, it seems many fans believe successful transfer activity is easy whereas it is not, no matter at what level you are operating.
There are many examples of high price transfer failures.
It is not clear to me who Spurs should have signed or maybe better expressed, failed to sign due to a reluctance to spend the money, as opposed to not being able to afford it.
No club seems to have the key to selecting either the best readymade players for their team or the best players with potential.
Part of the success of the rich clubs is that they can afford to make more mistakes as well as processing a lot more players rather than their skill in the transfer market.
I think most fans know about some high price failures but would be shocked at the ratio of hits to misses.
That is even before taking into account the number of good players who fail to develop or even get worse.
I believe a lot of that is because generally footballers are not either the most intelligent or the best educated individuals and not enough time is spent with them to guide them through the heady days of being young with a lot of money and access to the temptations of youth
So many youngsters want to be professional footballers that the clubs treat them carelessly and do not really concentrate on how to nurture them.
Confidence and egos are characteristics that have to be managed carefully and there are too many people involved in the management of football who have never been taught or been smart enough to learn this with the consequence that a lot of talent and money goes to waste.
Crowds and the Premiership
The return of crowds to Premiership matches is going to have a dramatic impact on next season’s matches. Nielsen's Gracenote has analysed the difference between matches with crowds and matches without. They compared the 288 matches in the 2019-20 season before the Covid-19 shutdown with the 345 matches with no attendances in the 2020-21 campaign.
Before Tuesday's matches they found that:
The percentage of home wins has dropped from last season's 44.8% with a crowd to 36.5% for the 345 matches played this season with no spectators.
Away wins have increased from 30.2% of last season's 288 matches with spectators to 40.9% of the 345 to be played without an attendance.
Home teams have scored 12% fewer goals this season in matches without spectators than they did in games with crowds in 2019-20 (1.33 goals per game this compared to 1.51 goals last campaign).
Away teams have scored 12% more goals. The increase here is from 1.22 goals per game to 1.36.
Referees are awarding more free kicks to the away teams than the home teams. With crowds last season, home teams were awarded 0.6 free kicks per match more than away teams. Away teams this season are awarded 0.6 free kicks per match more than home sides.
Previously, home teams would be awarded fewer yellow cards than their opponents, but the home clubs are now receiving more than the visiting teams.
With crowds, Premier League matches contained 21 dribbles per match on average. Now there are just over 18 dribbles per match with home players still having slightly more.
Tackling has also been on the decline with the number of tackles reducing from 33 per match last season with crowds to just over 30 in the 345 matches this term without spectators.
Strange XIs
Both Jack Morgan and John Williams noted that last month’s Jazz Hat crew were all off-spinners. John added “In my last year at school I guested for Pinner in a midweek game against RAF Henlow. Their off spinner - Peter Parfitt - managed to castle me.”
Here is this month’s selection. Which Jazz hat would fit them?
1. Heino Kuhn
2. Jordan Cox
3. Gary Ballance
4. James Hildreth
5. David Bedingham
6. Leus du Plooy
7. Ryan ten Doeschate
8. Mohammad Rizwan
9. Colin Ackerman
10 .Liam Livingstone
11. Graham van Buuren
King Cricket Matters
King Cricket reader and regular contributor Sam writes…
There’s a lot of nonsense spoken about early season conditions in England. Batting in April isn’t that difficult. Of course, it helps if the bowler serves up a feast of slow full-tosses. And if he’s six years old.
On the day it emerged the ECB was considering replacing ‘wickets’ with ‘outs’ in the game’s new format, with whose name I shan’t sully these pages, the small people in my house suddenly began to show a previously non-existent interest in cricket. Coincidence? Yes.
We started in the back garden. Plastic bat, yellow stumps - minus lost bails - and a small red tennis ball which soon disappeared into the neighbouring yard at cow corner. Just getting my eye in.
An audacious reverse ramp over backward point heralded a change in tempo, and after the luncheon break play resumed at the beach.
A sandy surface providing little or no bounce might be seen as a challenge. But once again, our naïve young seamer declined to use the facilities and was dispatched over his head, straight into the ice cream stall and out again. ‘Don’t bowl there, son.’
The girls decided they wanted to - if I may borrow a tired Vaughanism - ‘come to the party’, at which point proceedings descended into mild chaos.
There was still time for my wife to grace the crease for a little do. Ball in hand, I attempted a rib-tickling bumper, to push her back and keep her honest. But the ball stuck in the pitch and dribbled through for a double-bouncing leg side wide.
‘We’re cricketing!’ exclaimed the youngest from a very short, extremely silly mid-off. And we were. What a terrific day.
The Last Old Danes Gathering
In order to cater for the concerns of all potential attendees and ensure the largest possible attendance for this momentous occasion we will plan to hold this already postponed event in 2022.
Googlies Website
All the back editions of Googlies can be found on the G&C website. There are also many photographs most of which have never appeared in Googlies.
www.googliesandchinamen.com
Googlies and Chinamen
is produced by
James Sharp
Broad Lee House
Combs
High Peak
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[email protected]
An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 222
June 2021
Caption Competition
- Jonathan Agnew: Would Darren Stevens get in the Middlesex side?
- Concerned Middlesex Supporter: Tell me Gus, what is going wrong?
- Charles Colville: Tell me, is playing at Lord’s part of the problem?
- Rob Key: Gus, where do you think the problem lies at Middlesex? Is it the committee?
Rob Key: Well, is it Stuart Law? After all he drove the World’s Number 1 batsman away to Yorkshire.
Gus Fraser: No Stuart has become a good mate and is a fine leader.
Rob Key: Well that only leaves one answer, doesn’t it?
Gus Fraser: Err, what can you mean? Surely not? I am critical to the success of this famous club and am jolly and well loved. Aren’t I….?
Out and About
The Professor has finally abandoned his sofa
The return of “crowds” to county cricket could only mean one thing – a trip across the Pennines, deep into enemy territory, to watch Keaton Jennings practice his forward defensive. He is good at the forward defensive; he plays it very well…and very often. He took around 150 balls to get to 40 and many of those deliveries were met by the Keaton forward defensive. By contrast, the Yorkshire top order seem to be somewhat deficient in the stroke, as the scorecard of 21-6 in the first innings readily confirmed.
At times this match between the two unbeaten sides in this division didn’t seem a very even contest at all. Jennings’ practice session in the middle paid a handsome dividend, of course. After his careful 40, and especially
Keaton Jennings before lunch
after lunch, he was decidedly more expansive, particularly through extra-cover, a stroke which is, as it should be, really a forward defensive shot with a follow through. Towards the end he even got out the reverse sweep against Bess and it looked a most accomplished innings with scarcely an error. It was something of a surprise when on 114 he snicked the ball to slip.
Keaton Jennings after lunch
I recall seeing one of Jennings’ early matches at Headingley when he was with Durham. He looked, or so I thought, like a natural opening batsman. Indeed I thought he had ideal characteristics for an England opener: played the ball late, left well outside the off stump… and was born in South Africa. Googlies readers will remember his hundred on debut for England in Mumbai and the subsequent ups and downs of his Test career. Might he, like Hameed, get another go? I suppose, if he keeps rattling off hundreds like this one, a recall might be a possibility. Curiously, for an opening bat, he has a reputation as a fine player of spin (I guess a century in Mumbai does that) rather than someone who can deal well with the quicks where, in a few of his 17 Tests, he has looked frozen to the spot.
There were a few other performances that were of interest. Bess bowled quite tidily for a couple of longish spells, without looking like taking too many (or indeed any) wickets, only going for 10 from his first 10 overs. The comparison with the tripe he bowled in India (and, in truth, Sri Lanka) was striking. How you can bowl spin well at Old Trafford but not on an exploding pitch in India, I couldn’t say – I wonder if he knows. He took a bit of tap when Vilas decided to belt him over long-on, but 29 overs for 79 is not too dusty. It was difficult to see what he was doing with the ball from where we were sitting.
The Old Trafford authorities had closed half the ground (the nets side) and so the few hundred or so in the “crowd” were nicely socially distanced to the left of the pavilion in what used to be the Brain Statham end. The trouble was that with the care and concern for spectator enjoyment so often to the fore in the plans of cricket administrators, the pitch was on the closed side of the square. The boundary was some 15 yards in from where we were all sitting, and the pitch in the middle distance. There were replays on the screen but the person in charge of this facility seemed to choose them at random so it was not that useful. To add to the general feeling of the bizarre, the match was live-streamed on YouTube so I could watch it on my phone with about a 30 seconds delay. All very odd.
Duanne Olivier (“Ol-iff-ee-ah” remember) bowled quite quickly but also without any great penetration. He came to Yorkshire (reportedly on a £150,000-a-season contract) with a reputation as a lightning quick bowler who would serve his time as a potential England player. I saw his first game at Leeds against the Universities, and while he is undoubtedly quick, he has yet to lay waste to county batting orders.
The other player of interest (to me) was Harry Duke. The almost permanent absence of all the England players (Bairstow, Root, Rashid, Malan, Willey) has given opportunities, as they say, for young players “to come through”. One of those has been the Harrogate-born Jon Tattersall. Starting out as a leg-break bowler he was released by Yorkshire only to go away and reinvent himself as a ‘keeper. He has played well for a couple of seasons but this year the runs have dried up and he has been replaced by a child. Duke is small and agile and, as far as I could tell (since very little got passed the bat), seemed up to the job. Yorkshire have in the past fielded a schoolboy wicketkeeper in the first team (he told the Press that he was delighted to have missed double maths) but Duke looks even younger. Since he was the only one in the Yorkshire first innings to have made it to 50, the selectors look to have got it right, for once.
Given that summer has arrived in the north there can, surely, only be one result here and, in truth, Yorkshire didn’t look like championship material. The bowling looks pretty similar: all right arm quickish (with the exception of Bess) between 80 and 90 mph and, in the absence of the above (and Gary Balance), the batting doesn’t look too strong either. Indeed with the first six wickets falling for 21, “not too strong” might be regarded as something of an understatement. Defeat to the Red Rose, the first in some years, now looks inevitable.
This and That
Playing for Kent against Glamorgan Darren Stevens, now 45, came in with the score 80 for 5 which soon became 94 for 7. Undeterred Stevens hit 15 fours and 15 sixes in a score of 190 from 145 balls. He added 166 for the ninth wicket with Miguel Cummins who contributed just one run. I saw him bat at Hove on a visit with Jack Morgan and Jim Revier when he scored a hundred when he was still with Leicestershire. He seemed to take a fancy to Ollie Rayner that day who was still with Sussex.
Last Saturday I had to go to get a Covid test before this week’s trip to Chicago. When I got home I turned on Sky cricket and was surprised to see coverage of the Surrey v Middlesex match from the Oval. Surprising because Middlesex were covered a few days earlier in their match against Gloucestershire. Also surprising in that Middlesex are such a poor watch. On the Saturday only John Simpson played with any conviction whilst Jordan Clark took wickets with full tosses and wide half volleys. It looked like men against boys which was emphasized as Burns and Stoneman increased their lead effortlessly before the close.
I didn’t watch the pre-lunch session on Sunday but Surrey only lost two wickets and after Middlesex lost both openers Gubbins and Handscomb played with ease through the afternoon and it looked as if they would pull off an unlikely winning chase. However, there was then a rain break which lost five overs and took the required run rate up to nearly 10. Middlesex then lost a flurry of wickets in a mad couple of overs before settling for a draw.
Handscomb scored his first runs in this innings having gone into the match with an average of 7. He seems to have a normal looking haircut at the sides and on top but for some inexplicable reason has ten inches hanging below his cap at the back. This is a hirsute version of the bandanas utilised by the Foreign Legion or indeed Chris Gayle. You might be able to get away with such idiosyncrasies when things are going well for you but just look a prat when they aren’t.
It is interesting that the English press has been outraged that the BCCI applied to have one of this year’s tests against England cancelled so that they could fit in somewhere the remaining matches from this year’s IPL. They haven’t got it yet that the big force in World cricket is India and that their main competition, the IPL, is the biggest event in the cricket world. The Ashes may be dear to the English but not to anyone else much. The English may lead the world in Soccer at least at club level with the Premiership but cricket is continuing to fall away as the authorities flail around this year with four major (or not so major) competitions.
Has the UK’s most loathed man suddenly become a hero? Cumming’s confirming the dirt on the UK’s appalling leadership and government may actually do some good and reminds everyone of the genocide carried out last year in the care homes. It is also useful that he pointed out that there is something seriously broken in a democracy that leaves the voting public with a choice between Johnson and Corbyn.
Morgan Matters
In the May Cricketer, George Dobell writes "the Hundred is like a turd in a swimming pool", "county cricket is at the bottom of the scrapheap" and "the counties are fourth in line of priority behind England, the IPL and the Hundred". Jon Ryan (ex-sports editor of the Sunday Telegraph) says that "Alec may have been one of England's greatest Test bowlers, but Eric Bedser was always the king of the twins". Mike Jakeman says: "if the ECB are paying players a salary and players are also getting money from the IPL, it does not stand to reason that they are always rested from England duty and never from any other cricket". Who is the most dominant side in cricket history? Melinda Farrell says it is Meg Lanning's all-conquering Australians. I had not heard that Derek Ufton of Kent (cricket), Charlton and England (football) had died in March aged 93.
J Anderson will be 39 in July, but he assures us that he has no thoughts of retirement.
Middlesex matters: TSRJ is having surgery today on a torn cartilage in his knee and is likely to miss "much of the season" so J Harris makes a quick return after his short spell with Glam.
Tanya says that J Bracey "skipped to a pretty 74 at Lord's", I'm not sure whether he skipped or not or whether it was pretty, but it was actually 75.
Lord's: Mx 152 a/o (N Gubbins 52, J Simpson 40 and only 2 others sneaked into double figures, D Payne 6-56) Glo are 38-1 needing only 52 more. I am almost glad that I do not have to go any more. There has been no play yet in any of the other 7 games, but play is due to start at the Bowl at 5.30... but they only had a handful of overs and H were 110-4 when the rain returned. As expected, G strolled to victory by 7 wickets, 2 wickets to Bamber and one for Harris, Middlesex chuck out T Lace finished on 31*. Tanya tells us that "David Payne skedaddled through the Middlesex defences to pocket 11 wickets in the match, a career best...there was time for Thilan Walallawita to bash Payne into the Grandstand for six" and for "a delightful cameo from Tom Lace who, with great delicacy, cover drove, cut, clipped and nudged his way to an unbeaten 31 against his old club".
Last game of the season: Rs beat Luton 3-1 and drew level with Cardiff on 68 points, but Cardiff's goal difference was better, so they finished eighth and we were ninth (and 4 points clear of Middlesbro' in tenth), which is not too bad considering how awful it was looking in early season.
A Giles says the IPL's planned restart in Sept is likely not to include England players as they have international commitments. AG also says that Eng may use the upcoming series v NZ to look at some "new faces" and A Martin thinks he means eg J Bracey and O Robinson.
The ECB has lost £16.1m in the last year and, of course, is blaming the dreaded virus.
C Silverwood will sit out the 6 ODIs v SL and Pak in July with assistants P Collingwood and G Thorpe taking charge.
Another brilliant day for Middlesex at Lord's: H 208 (K Barker 84, T Murts 3-48, E Bamber 3-55), Middlesex 101 (P Handscomb 24, he was one of only 3 to reach double figures, Harris 16 and Cullen 11 were the others, K Abbott 5-41). H need 66 to win, with the innings about to start... and, of course, they won easily by 7 wickets, Murtagh 2-29. Tanya said that "once again Middlesex's batting proved flaky" and they "staggered to 101 in their second innings".
There are worries about the fitness of J Archer who did not bowl a ball on the last day and bowled left arm spin in the warm up. Sussex said "he has a recurrence of his elbow problem and is currently unable to bowl". He has now been ruled out of next month's 2 Tests v NZ. B Stokes (broken finger) has also been ruled out of those Tests, while C Woakes, J Buttler, S Curran and Moeen A are "set to be spared an immediate return to the biosecure bubble".
Middlesex have "amassed" an incredible 44 points from their 6 matches. Astonishingly, this is not the worst in the country as Derbyshire have 41, and Leicestershire 40. However, both of those have a game in hand, but nobody can equal Middlesex's record of 5 defeats, no other county has more than 3.
C Rushworth is now Durham's leading wicket-taker with 528, overtaking G Onions.
S Broad has stated that ex-national selector E Smith never rated him so he is quite happy to see Smith depart from selection duties. How can you not rate someone who has 517 wickets in 144 Tests? Cf: I Botham 383, R Willis 325, F Trueman 307 and D Underwood 297? The only Englishman above him is, of course, J Anderson (606).
The 21/22 Ashes tour is going to look fairly strange with i) host venues being "rejigged"; ii) no warm-up games against local opposition; and iii) the possibility that there will be no travelling support. This has been caused by i) the T20 WC which runs until mid-November; and ii) the likely 14 day quarantine period on arrival. Why let that sort of bollocks affect an Ashes series, which should surely take priority over T20 crap? The dates of the Tests are: 8-12/12, Brisbane; 16-20/12 Adelaide (day/ nighter); 26-30/12 Melbourne; 5-9/1 Sydney; and 14-18/1 Perth.
Middlesex have re-signed Paul Stirling for (part of) their T20 season. He replaces Mitchell Marsh, who has been called up for the Oz white ball tour of WI in July. Another signing is expected for the remainder of the season.
J Archer is expected to have an op on his troublesome elbow possibly as soon as tomorrow, but then an 8 week lay-off is probable.
India have asked England to move this summer's 5th Test (scheduled for Sept) or even cancel it altogether, because it clashes with some T20 rubbish (IPL I think). The ECB is expected to "hold its ground".
Middlesex have signed Kiwi allrounder Daryl Mitchell for the final 9 group matches of the T20 (you will recall that P Stirling has been signed for the first 5 matches).
Oval: Middlesex finished on 250-6 (Roach 5-86), 40 short, not a bad effort considering how useless they have been this season. Tanya wrote: "rain and bad light squalled over the ground at a crucial moment, leaving them to chase 74 in 8 overs with every man on the boundary".
Ex-Middlesex allrounder (we should never have let him go) Gareth Berg has signed a new contract with N'hants until the end of the 2022 season. GB is averaging 44 with the bat in the Championship this year and took career best match bowling figures of 9-90 v Sx earlier this month.
The final game of this season is the 5-day Bob Willis Trophy match, which is scheduled to finish on October 2nd!
Today's G has a large photo of 6 Yorkshire men (bowler, keeper and 4 slips) all screaming their heads off and all with arms raised appealing for an lbw against an un-named Glamorgan batsman, but we can see from the photo that the ball is missing leg stump by a considerable margin!
Andy Bull urges us to enjoy the last week (for quite a while) of County Championship cricket, which started today, because it is almost time for the dreaded Hundred to wipe the smiles off our faces. The Hundred players have apparently been working on adverts and other Hundred nonsense at a "makeshift studio in Twickenham".
Former Test bowlers D Malcolm and D Headley have been offered opportunities to become match referees... because they are black! Somebody suddenly noticed that there was a distinct lack of non-white officials almost throughout the ECB when J Holder and I Dawood made allegations of discrimination.
Grace Rd: How embarrassing! Middlesex lose to useless Leicestershire, by 5 wickets.
Molloy Matters
Ken Molloy sent me this
One of the criticisms levelled at Levy, for example-and there are many others, is his reluctance to spend money in the transfer market but the reality is that while a high-priced player like Messi or Ronaldo may help bring success to a club the best signings are often players who do not cost a fortune but suddenly blossom at the new club
Reading the comments, it seems many fans believe successful transfer activity is easy whereas it is not, no matter at what level you are operating.
There are many examples of high price transfer failures.
It is not clear to me who Spurs should have signed or maybe better expressed, failed to sign due to a reluctance to spend the money, as opposed to not being able to afford it.
No club seems to have the key to selecting either the best readymade players for their team or the best players with potential.
Part of the success of the rich clubs is that they can afford to make more mistakes as well as processing a lot more players rather than their skill in the transfer market.
I think most fans know about some high price failures but would be shocked at the ratio of hits to misses.
That is even before taking into account the number of good players who fail to develop or even get worse.
I believe a lot of that is because generally footballers are not either the most intelligent or the best educated individuals and not enough time is spent with them to guide them through the heady days of being young with a lot of money and access to the temptations of youth
So many youngsters want to be professional footballers that the clubs treat them carelessly and do not really concentrate on how to nurture them.
Confidence and egos are characteristics that have to be managed carefully and there are too many people involved in the management of football who have never been taught or been smart enough to learn this with the consequence that a lot of talent and money goes to waste.
Crowds and the Premiership
The return of crowds to Premiership matches is going to have a dramatic impact on next season’s matches. Nielsen's Gracenote has analysed the difference between matches with crowds and matches without. They compared the 288 matches in the 2019-20 season before the Covid-19 shutdown with the 345 matches with no attendances in the 2020-21 campaign.
Before Tuesday's matches they found that:
The percentage of home wins has dropped from last season's 44.8% with a crowd to 36.5% for the 345 matches played this season with no spectators.
Away wins have increased from 30.2% of last season's 288 matches with spectators to 40.9% of the 345 to be played without an attendance.
Home teams have scored 12% fewer goals this season in matches without spectators than they did in games with crowds in 2019-20 (1.33 goals per game this compared to 1.51 goals last campaign).
Away teams have scored 12% more goals. The increase here is from 1.22 goals per game to 1.36.
Referees are awarding more free kicks to the away teams than the home teams. With crowds last season, home teams were awarded 0.6 free kicks per match more than away teams. Away teams this season are awarded 0.6 free kicks per match more than home sides.
Previously, home teams would be awarded fewer yellow cards than their opponents, but the home clubs are now receiving more than the visiting teams.
With crowds, Premier League matches contained 21 dribbles per match on average. Now there are just over 18 dribbles per match with home players still having slightly more.
Tackling has also been on the decline with the number of tackles reducing from 33 per match last season with crowds to just over 30 in the 345 matches this term without spectators.
Strange XIs
Both Jack Morgan and John Williams noted that last month’s Jazz Hat crew were all off-spinners. John added “In my last year at school I guested for Pinner in a midweek game against RAF Henlow. Their off spinner - Peter Parfitt - managed to castle me.”
Here is this month’s selection. Which Jazz hat would fit them?
1. Heino Kuhn
2. Jordan Cox
3. Gary Ballance
4. James Hildreth
5. David Bedingham
6. Leus du Plooy
7. Ryan ten Doeschate
8. Mohammad Rizwan
9. Colin Ackerman
10 .Liam Livingstone
11. Graham van Buuren
King Cricket Matters
King Cricket reader and regular contributor Sam writes…
There’s a lot of nonsense spoken about early season conditions in England. Batting in April isn’t that difficult. Of course, it helps if the bowler serves up a feast of slow full-tosses. And if he’s six years old.
On the day it emerged the ECB was considering replacing ‘wickets’ with ‘outs’ in the game’s new format, with whose name I shan’t sully these pages, the small people in my house suddenly began to show a previously non-existent interest in cricket. Coincidence? Yes.
We started in the back garden. Plastic bat, yellow stumps - minus lost bails - and a small red tennis ball which soon disappeared into the neighbouring yard at cow corner. Just getting my eye in.
An audacious reverse ramp over backward point heralded a change in tempo, and after the luncheon break play resumed at the beach.
A sandy surface providing little or no bounce might be seen as a challenge. But once again, our naïve young seamer declined to use the facilities and was dispatched over his head, straight into the ice cream stall and out again. ‘Don’t bowl there, son.’
The girls decided they wanted to - if I may borrow a tired Vaughanism - ‘come to the party’, at which point proceedings descended into mild chaos.
There was still time for my wife to grace the crease for a little do. Ball in hand, I attempted a rib-tickling bumper, to push her back and keep her honest. But the ball stuck in the pitch and dribbled through for a double-bouncing leg side wide.
‘We’re cricketing!’ exclaimed the youngest from a very short, extremely silly mid-off. And we were. What a terrific day.
The Last Old Danes Gathering
In order to cater for the concerns of all potential attendees and ensure the largest possible attendance for this momentous occasion we will plan to hold this already postponed event in 2022.
Googlies Website
All the back editions of Googlies can be found on the G&C website. There are also many photographs most of which have never appeared in Googlies.
www.googliesandchinamen.com
Googlies and Chinamen
is produced by
James Sharp
Broad Lee House
Combs
High Peak
SK23 9XA
[email protected]
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