GOOGLIES & CHINAMEN
An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 21
September 2004
The Nostalgia Issue
Many of us will be re-uniting at South Hampstead on Sunday 5th September and so to get us suitably in the mood we have a number of nostalgic articles in this issue. Bill Hart picks his Dream Teams from the sixties, Dave Garrard describes the recent Old Grammarians bonding session and Gary Rhoades recalls being plucked from the score box to play for Shepherds Bush thirds in what was to be Bill Adams’ final appearance as a player.
The creditable performance of the English team in the test matches cannot pass unmentioned and is based on an all round improvement in batting, bowling, fielding and captaincy. Some may argue that the quality of the opposition may have been below par, but a feature of strong sides is that they make the opposition look mediocre.
Meanwhile, the Great Jack Morgan was outraged at the Professor’s taunting comments in the last issue directed towards his, my and indeed many other old fogeys’ views on Dumberer Cricket: “ Is the Professor arguing that because lots of people go to Dumberer matches that this makes them good cricket? Surely this is a ludicrous argument? Would he argue that because some crap pop record has been bought by thousands of eight year olds that this makes it good music? Wouldn’t we expect better from the Professor?”
Young Dave Myers told me recently that he had acquired the services of a bowling machine and so when I visited him in Much Wenlock I was interested to see where he was using it since his house is set into the side of a hill. He had utilized the services of a JCB and carved out a flat section behind the house and erected a net. The wicket was damp when I visited and there was not much evidence of Surrey Loam but his son, Edward, joined us and we were soon having a gentle work out in civvies. Did we use the bowling machine? No it wasn’t necessary - Dave’s nagging accuracy with the ball rendered the robot superfluous to our proceedings.
It used to be just rain that stopped play but Ian MacIntosh told me about a couple of unusual incidents at Milverton Road this season: “In G&C20 you mentioned a chap called Snapper who lives in Milverton road but plays for WGCCC. I actually played against him when he was playing for the Stoics at the club last month. Incidentally, play was halted for twenty minutes during the game when the fielding side rushed from the field of play due to the arrival of a traffic warden in Milverton Road, which is now a controlled parking area during the week and appropriate tickets were not being displayed on the vehicles.
There was another unusual interruption of play at South Hampstead this season in a match between Willesden Green Pakistan Community Centre and Nottingham Pakistani Community. This was when the Virgin Medical Helicopter Ambulance landed on the ground, as it was the nearest open space to a hotel in Willesden High Road where it had to get to. Once down, the medics were driven to the address by a South Hampstead member.”
Out and About with the Professor
We had a good result last Saturday that might be of passing interest. We played Millhillians again. If you recall Daren Sammy played in the away match earlier this season and I had assumed that having made the West Indies side, he would be doing more important things. Not so. There he was to open the bowling. Given that he got 5 for 25 in the first match there was some apprehension. However, he had James put down in the first over and thereafter was put to the sword, ending with 13-0-65-0. He is not super quick but is quick enough and does move the ball both ways. However the WGCCC opener (not James this time) batted so well that he was reduced to bowling bouncers, two of which disappeared into the bushes.
Interestingly, Millhillians also fielded a MCC Young Cricketer called O'Brien who fielded 12th man for England in the Lords test. So, apparently, did Sammy for the West Indies. So the opposition had two players in their team who had been 12th man for each of the two test sides in the same game. The Great Jack Morgan probably knows how many times this has happened before but I don't think I've ever heard of such a thing. We knocked off their 203 for 1 - so a good win.
I went to the last two days at Lords - saw Flintoff and Vaughan on the Sunday and the West Indies bowled out on the Monday. In the same weekend WGCCC won three out of four League matches and got through to the semi-final of the county cup. So I am a very happy chappy!
The Last Hurrah When I heard from Bill Hart a few months back he referred to an Old Grammarians reunion and so I wasn’t too surprised when Dave Garrrard sent me this
I still play very occasionally, and last weekend we had an Old Grammarian’s reunion cricket match in deepest Worcestershire. The average age of the team was 56. Roy Payne doesn't play at all now, and Mike Selvey might have played had he not been on duty at the Open at Troon. The Match was against The Lenches Cricket Club and was played at Church Lench, a village in the middle of nowhere about 5 miles north of Evesham, on Sunday 18th July. Most of us had not played nor seen each other for over ten years, and we called the match 'The Last Hurrah!'
John King is 72, and playing in this match, which was officially recognised as an Old Grammarians fixture, meant that he has now played for the OGs in seven decades! He and I used to open in the good old days! His old captain, Danny Smith, who often captained our midweek side at South Hampstead, presented him with an engraved tankard during the tea break. It was quite emotional!
The whole weekend was great. Most of us met up at a hotel in Evesham early on the Saturday evening and we had a great 'bonding session'. We went for a pre-booked curry at 9.00 p.m. at a long table for 22, and afterwards some carried on bonding (or re-bonding) back at the hotel.
Standing (L to R) Don Clarke (umpire), Rick Money, Dave Garrard,
Glenn Gershkoff, Niall Addison, Nick Phipps, Dave Boynton, Chris Garrard, Cathy Clarke (scorer - wife of Don).
Seated: Andy Frost, John King, Derek Lawrence, Dave Mowlam, Peter Finucane.
The match itself started at 12.00 and was eventually rained off at about
5.00 p.m. We had time to get them out for 191; and we were about 100 for 2 when the rain came. John opened and scored 31 to prove he hasn't lost it although his running between the wickets wasn't up to much.
Following the match, we were led to a delightful country pub serving real ale and good food, and then some went home while others headed back to Evesham for yet more 'bonding' and a second night in the hotel. Following a 'full English' on the Monday morning, those of us who were left headed back up the M40. It was generally considered to be a fantastic weekend, and the 'Next Last Hurrah' has already been provisionally arranged for the equivalent weekend in 2005. We're playing Cheriton Fitzpaine CC on Saturday 16th July. Spectators will be welcome but they'd have to do a lot of bonding!
I asked Bill Hart whether he had attended this notable event and he confessed that he had experienced a “senior moment” and forgotten about it completely
Are we as good as it seems?
I posed this question to George and the Professor. George replied first:
When England were struggling against better opposition, it always seemed to me that they could have a good session or so, but not string them together. Now it seems that the reverse is true, with both New Zealand and the West Indies having decent periods, but then failing to capitalise. Is this the key to success and failure?
Then I received this from the Professor:
I suppose the literal answer must be "yes". Given the run of results since the Ashes tour, we could hardly have done much better. There may be some doubts about the strength of the opposition but you can only play whom you do and there were very few doubts, before the series, that the New Zealand side were competitive. Indeed, I think we all took the view that it would be close.
For me the thing that has changed is the bowling. I guess "The Durham Sprayer" must have read your journal and reacted to the sobriquet in the best possible way. In a sense, it doesn't seem too difficult - bowl at high pace, hit the seam, and pitch it on or just outside the off stump! That's what Glen McGrath has been doing for years, to very good effect. The other seamers have all bowled a much better line in recent games. Add to that the newfound ability of Giles to spin the ball - and we have an attack! I can't decide whether the Giles renaissance is a result of him doing something different or the change in the pitches. Certainly at Lords the ball turned for Banks on the first morning. Who ever heard of the ball spinning on the first day of a test?
The other big plus must be Strauss who looks like an old-style test player, albeit still scoring at a break-neck pace, in that he doesn’t appear to want to get out. Trescothick, Butcher, Key and Flintoff all seem to play too freely for test match conditions.
*
My own view is that the English side has made considerable advances but will be tested both in South Africa this winter and, of course, by the Australians next summer. A measure of the player’s individual progress can be viewed by seeing how many of them would be selected today for a combined England/Australia side. I suspect that only Harmison and Flintoff would get the nod.
When an Old Cricketer leaves the crease
Gary Rhoades sent me this reminiscence from his formative years
The Professor’s comment on scorers being asked to play at the last moment in a recent G&C reminded me of the occasion of his father’s last match for the Bush. I was scoring a 1st XI match at East Acton Lane when told I’d have to give that up and go and play for the 3rd XI at Woburn Green.
I don’t know when Bill Adams had previously last played for SBCC but I certainly couldn’t recall him playing. The game ‘ away to Woburn Green’ was to be his last match. In saying goodbye to Bill it must be added that there were three Bush debutants that day. These were Vic Rhoades (48), George Dennistoun (similar sort of age) and a twentyish newcomer called John Tickner. If this sounds a strange side it certainly was and can only be explained by the fact that the Barnsdales were on holiday.
In the mid sixties the Barnsdale family was the backbone of the 3rd XI. Len Senior was wicketkeeper captain, whilst son Len Junior was an opening batsman. At the same time younger brother Alan was a fairly useful medium pace bowler and they were joined by their younger brothers, Stephen and John. Anyway the hordes of Barnsdales were not with us and as we left East Acton Lane in a John Darbon driven coach a dapper and excitable George Dennistoun started regaling us with stories of his last game; when he ‘scored runs with Parfitt’. As my father mumbled later ‘ he got bugger all today’.
This was a scratch game as it had been set up at the last moment and no one could remember playing against Woburn Green before. But their facilities were quite good and they were a fair side. They also had good support and, having elected to bat, Woburn were soon hammering our woefully weak attack to all parts of the ground to much applause. After an hour they had a hundred on the board and we had our hands full in the field. Jim Revier, our scorer, also had his hands full with Denis. Denis was a lovely chap of about 17 who became extremely excited every time Woburn Green scored a run and would cry out ‘I’ll put the scores up’. This was quite amusing for about 10 minutes but over the next two hours became a bit wearisome.
After they had amassed their first hundred John Darbon took himself off and asked John Tickner to have a bowl. It is always interesting when a newcomer to a club plays his first innings or has his first bowl and this was no exception. He briskly paced out a run of 12 or 14 paces and then turned and ran in half of his run in a most athletic manner such that a few eyes met in the field. This looked promising! John was just under 6ft, fresh faced, blond and slim. And it remained promising for the first 10 paces of his run up. Then in his penultimate stride his head jerked back somewhere in the direction of mid-on and in his last stride he contorted his body so that his arm came over backwards and from somewhere near his left ear. The ball hammered into the turf about four feet from the bowling crease and trickled towards the covers. It was at its closest point to the facing batsman when it left the bowler’s hand.
I was fielding at wide mid-off and my father was at deep point. The ball eventually came to rest about 5 yards from his feet. He couldn’t pick the ball up as he was trying to control his emotions. With his knees bent forward his shoulders were rising and falling in waves of repressed hilarity. I was no better but had at least had much useful training in school assemblies when the school orchestra played. There was no such ‘holding back’ from Bill and his deep, rich, throaty laugh emanated from somewhere near gully. The facing batsman was nonplussed as was the umpire who eventually signaled a wide.
It would have been kind to have stopped John from bowling another ball, claiming a dislocated shoulder or sudden dementia madness, but he did finish his over. It took 14 balls and about 10 minutes. By the end of that over all the Bush team were wracked with laughter and in no fit state to continue. But continue we did and really things didn’t get much worse. Woburn strode on to about 250 for not very many and we replied with about 80. Geoff Cleaver top scored which was usually a sign that we hadn’t scored many. As I said before, George got a duck and he and John Tickner were not asked to turn out again. My father, who I hadn’t seen play cricket outside of our garden, scored a few very slowly and surprisingly this wasn’t his last game. He turned out a year later in late September to accompany John Hatfield in their last games for the Bush. I’m afraid I can’t remember Bill’s innings, which is a shame, but I’ll never forget that laugh.
Dream Team Bill Hart sent me this to help you all get in nostalgic mode for 5th September
Recently, whilst re-reading the back editions of “Googlies and Chinamen” I noticed that Jim has occasionally mentioned one or other of his old South Hampstead colleagues and referred to him as the “best of his type that he had ever played with”. This stimulated me to look back over the twelve seasons (1962-73) that I spent at Milverton Road, in order to select an eclectic South Hampstead 1st XI.
Sadly, my first move was to select myself. Before coming to that conclusion, I tried to be objective and consider the merits of the various opening bowlers throughout the period, but my conceit kept getting in my way, and eventually it triumphed. From the outset I discounted Ron Hooker and Dick Richardson because they were professionals.
During the period under review, there were many very good players who almost got into my eleven. Colin Price, John Weale, Bruce Tutton and Jim Sharp were splendid batsmen and great team men. As an opening bowler, Don Wallis was a tremendous trier, never knowing when a cause was lost. Alan Cox was an extremely talented slow left armer, but he never fulfilled his potential until after my retirement. Although he only played for one season, Dick Boothroyd almost got in. An astonishing bowler, off about six yards run-up, he was quite fast, and seemed to bowl continuous straight yorkers.
I am bound to have missed someone and will probably be kicking myself later but here is my selected team, in batting order. The choice of captain, Bob Peach, is obvious, and I suppose I would be collecting the tea money.
Terry Cordaroy, Robin Ager (wicket keeper), Bob Peach, Len Stubbs, Alvin Neinow, George Cole, John Tutton, Ian Jerman, Bill Hart, Roy Phipps, Ossie Burton.
The first seven were all extremely accomplished batsmen, and there could scarcely be a better number eight than Ian Jerman. The wicket keeping would be of the highest class, and a bowling attack of Jerman, Hart, Burton, Peach, Phipps and Tutton (not to mention Cole), would even give a Hornsey eclectic team plenty to think about.
I was delighted to receive this from Bill and immediately emailed him back asking him to select a team for his SH Superstars to play against
Following on from my Dream Team of “South Hampstead players from my era (1962-73)” the editor has asked me to turn my attention to selecting a similar team from my opponents. This is a much more difficult task because a selection which is already subjective, may be rendered even more distorted by the form that the individual was in, at the time of the meeting. However, it was an interesting challenge, and here are the results. Immediately one is spoilt for choice, and it becomes essential to clear the mind by eliminating certain candidates. For example, although he would be in most people’s team, sadly I never played against Ian Bedford, so he must be left out.
Also excluded are those who spent a long time in Test or County cricket. This takes out Raman Subba Row (O.Whitgiftians), John Price (Wembley), Mike Brearley (Brentham), Graham Barlow (Brentham), Keith Jones (Shepherds Bush) & Ted Clark (Teddington).
When my list was finished it was obvious that some very good players had not been included. They included Brentham’s Roger Kingdon (because he was only very young by the time that I retired), and the following: - John Taylor (Wanstead), John Swann (Brentham), Peter Ray (Wembley), Bob Fisher (Ealing), Eaton Swabey (Mitcham), John Slack (UCS Old Boys) Keith Salter (Maidenhead & Bray), Norman Parks (Beddington) & David Straw (O.Whitgiftians).
Eventually the choice was made, and the following (in batting order) would be a very good match for my South Hampstead Dream Team: -
Alan Dey (Hornsey), Trevor Rosier (Dulwich), Roger Pearman (Hornsey), David Heyes (Finchley), Neville Griffin (Beddington), Hugh Pearman (Hornsey), Alan Coxon (Ealing), Alan Price (Ealing), Mike Sturt (Brondesbury) (wkt), Dennis Marriott (Mitcham), Brian Read (Brentham). 12th man Roy Cutler (Shepherds Bush).
That’s a hell of a side! Four fine seam bowlers in Read, Marriott, Griffin & Rosier. Great spin in Price and H.Pearman, and a very dangerous left arm “cutter” bowler in Coxon. Solid batting would be provided by both the Pearmans & Dey, and terrific hitting from Heyes, Rosier, Griffin & Coxon. I think they would beat us three times in five, but it would be a hell of a series!
More Bad Behaviour
When I visited WGCCC during their cricket week the Professor pointed out that the Bad Behaviour referred to in G&C19 was mild compared to that encountered in today’s club cricket. I suggested that club Presidents might be responsible for saying what would or would not be acceptable but he was quick to respond that it was down to the cricket committee.
I then received this from him:
You will be pleased to know that WGCCC completed their second win this year over Sawbridgeworth but it was such an ill-tempered game that it caused their Club Captain to write to ours. Our Club Captain, Terry, doesn't feel entirely secure with the written word, so I drafted the reply for him.
I have edited this a little for reasons of brevity
Dear Mr. Meadmore,
Thank you for your letter of 7th July. I think we can both agree about some matters, principally that a good game of cricket, played by some talented cricketers was marred by what appeared to be quite unacceptable behaviour on the part of some of the players. For spectators it is always difficult to know what is said in the middle some 60 or 70 yards away. Moreover, the accounts given by participants are not, to put it bluntly, characterised by objectivity. However some things seem to be clear:
First, all the incidents that you refer to happened during the WGCCC innings, i.e., when there were only two WGCCC players on the pitch at any one time.
Secondly, all the WGCCC batsmen reported being subject to a stream of foul-mouthed abuse from, but not exclusively, the Sawbridgeworth wicket keeper. Several of our players have considerable experience of cricket at many levels and are far from fading flowers themselves; however, they all reported disgusting, foul and abusive language being used persistently and incessantly. For example, Stewart Page, who opened the innings, got off the mark with a boundary hit all along the ground. The bowler followed through to within a yard or two of him and said: “You cunt”.
However, it is of Martin James’ behaviour that you complain. I have spoken to Martin and he is quite blunt in recounting what he said. He “pulled away” from a couple of deliveries because of movement behind the screen. The wicket keeper’s response was: “Who the fuck are you then, some first class fucking cricketer”. Martin’s reply (doubtless enhanced by obscene epithets) was to suggest that he (Martin) had had a sexual relationship with the wicket keeper’s mother. This remark was as objectionable as it was risible. Martin did not know the player let alone his mother, who is doubtless an Australian housewife of unimpeachable character. However, it was intended to offend and clearly did so. It was an utterly indefensible remark for which we unreservedly apologise. Martin has been spoken to about the incident and warned about his future conduct. It is, while self-evidently ludicrous, vulgar, childish and offensive to say such things. It is not the type of remark that should be spoken by anyone, least of all a former captain of the Club and the County who does, as it happens, have first class experience.
What no one can determine without question is the sequence of these events. But we utterly refute the suggestion that Martin instigated the slanging match. Frankly, it is naïve in the extreme to suppose that Martin made his remark unprompted and entirely unprovoked. Indeed some flavour of the provocation can be judged from the incident when Martin was bowled a “beamer”. It may have been accidental, but the wicket keeper’s comment to the bowler, overheard by both our players was: “Hard luck, Sam. Don’t know how you missed this cunt’s big head”.
When Martin was out to a smart catch at mid-off, a huddle quite naturally formed around the fielder to congratulate him. Martin had to pass the group on his way to the pavilion and when he did so a diminutive dark-hair player detached himself from the group and chose to “accompany” Martin part of the way with demonstrative and sarcastic applause, right under his nose. Unlike the “who said what” discussion, this could be clearly seen from all round the ground. Moreover, there was no cricket-related justification for this piece of truculence – Martin was out, and was a third of the way to the pavilion. It was a deliberate and puerile attempt to provoke.
As I have already said, it is not possible, from beyond the boundary, to get a definitive view of who said what to whom. We shall have to wait for the umpires’ report. What is clear to me is that there was some unacceptable behaviour on both sides. We are not naïve, and I can recall some forthright exchanges in the past with Messrs Dash, Abbey, et al. which were regarded as part of the game and were settled with a handshake and a pint after the game. However, I’m sure that we both agree that that is a far cry from a sustained, relentless stream of filthy remarks which have no place in the game.
Lastly, I very much hope that these incidents and the resulting correspondence do nothing to harm the good relations between our respective clubs which have been built up over many years and still exist. Our President, for example, tells me that he was made most welcome at Sawbridgeworth earlier this year, and at least one of our senior members has warm and happy memories of his time as a Sawbridgeworth player.
Yours sincerely,
The Professor finished with this:
As you might imagine, we were all a bit worried about last Saturday’s third game against Sawbridgeworth. In the event, we bowled them out for 100 and knocked them off in 20 overs. Who scored the winning runs? Had to be, didn't it...Martin James.
Bush Belles - All, or at least some, of the answers Gary Rhoades tells me that the unknown young lady in the front row of the picture published G&C20 was Linda Macguire. He continued: “She went to the same junior school as the Great Jack Morgan, Dave Perrin, Jim Revier and me. They're wearing that kit because whites didn't suit them. I was scorer for that event which was a 6 over a side cricket match that I think took place on an evening of Cricket Week in1966. The gents batted and bowled left handed from memory unless of course they were left-handed! Beats Twenty20.”
Irritating trends in modern cricket-number 20 Nobody minds whether Channel 4 televises test cricket or not. Indeed, it makes it accessible to some of you, such as the Great Jack Morgan, who will have nothing of Uncle Rupert’s offerings. However, what is outrageous is that they dictate to the ECB the playing hours so that their early evening soap operas, or more particularly their audiences, are not disrupted.
Test matches should start at 11.30am with lunch at 1.30 and tea at 4.15pm. The pathetic needs of this broadcasting authority result in play beginning at 10.30am when civilized people are still at the breakfast table, lunch being taken at 12.30pm when we are still wiping the elevenses biscuit crumbs from our chins, and tea at 3.10pm when the port is still circulating.
The only redeeming feature of these absurd arrangements is that because the overs are bowled so slowly and, north of Lords, it always rains, play often goes over the scheduled finish and all their dictatorial plans are foiled.
Bad Grounds- the Scrubs revisited The Great Jack Morgan pointed out that it was actually Bill Adams, the Professor’s dad, who organized the games at Wormwood Scrubs prison, as a result of his links through Hammersmith library. He went on to add: “The water-filled tennis balls were hopeless for spinning, flighting or swinging, so I essayed some Doug Slade-style off-cutters and found them surprisingly effective; in fact, I was employed primarily as a bowler at the prison and batted down the order. When I did get to the wicket, my favourite shot, I recall, became the 2 runs awarded for hitting the ball down into the dungeons square of the wicket. We might have repaired to East Acton Lane on that occasion, but there was, in fact, a bar in Len’s sports and social club just outside the gates and we enjoyed the facilities there more than once…. the crumpet wasn’t up to much though.”
Re-union at South Hampstead
The re-union at South Hampstead on Sunday 5th September will be taking place within a few days of this edition’s distribution. If you have not booked a place but would still like to join in please just come along. The event commences at noon and the buffet lunch will commence at 1pm. The charge for the event, including lunch, is £10. There will be a first team match against Paddington during the afternoon. The following have confirmed their attendance:
Bob and Diana Peach, Steve and Heather Thompson, Roy and Joyce Dodson, Bill and Gill Hart, Alvin and Helen Nienow, Robin and Carol Ager, Len Stubbs, Terry Cordaroy, Jim Sharp, Wynne Sharp, Wally and Di Barratt, Ken James, Roy Cutler, Geoff Cleaver, Allan Clain, Ian Jerman, Bob and Francis Denley, Russ Collins, Allen Bruton, Nigel Ross, John Bowerman, Ossie Burton, Lionel Haywood, Mike D’Silva, Paul Martin, Bob Baxter, Harry Rose, Alf Langley, Junior Gale, Ian MacIntosh, Laurie and Iris Huntley, Roy Phipps, David & Margaret Mindell, Dipak Parmar, Geoffrey Higgins, Alan May and his wife, Harry Compton and his wife, Ted Meade-King, Brian & Alison Fuller, Fred & Carol Perham, David Simpson, Jack Singman and Mary Hancock.
Sadly, Peter Huntley will be too ill to attend; Clive Coleman and Russell Bowes have had to cry off.
Strange Elevens
The Jazz Hat bunch in the last issue all qualified by virtue of their having been Young Cricketer of the Year. The Great Jack Morgan has compiled this month’s Strange XI from Middlesex players who were all born in Africa:
Andy Strauss
Sven Koenig
Ben Hutton
Jacques Kallis
Norman Featherstone
Jamie Dalrymple
Phil Edmonds
Vincent van der Bijl
Chad Keegan
Roddy Kinkead-Weekes
Nantie Hayward
He goes on to explain his selection criteria: “I quickly wrote down twelve names and was debating who to leave out, when I realised that Roddy had to be included otherwise you would have a go at me for not selecting a keeper. I therefore had to discard two and chose Compton who is showing encouraging signs of progress actually, but as he is not yet an established player, it was easy to leave him out. The other was Klusener whose bowling is clearly inferior to the other four pace bowlers selected, though there could be a case for including him instead of Dalrymple, but it was nice to get in someone who was born in Nairobi! Hutton is in the Strauss category of having returned to Blighty at an early age (and joined Strauss at Radley College, Durham University and Middlesex: will he also join him in the England team?), but Compton lived in South Africa until his late teens and speaks with a distinctive accent.”
Earlier Editions
I will be please to email you a copy of the earlier editions of Googlies & Chinamen, if you missed or have mislaid them. If you received this edition through a third party, please send me your email address to ensure that you get on the main mailing list for future editions.
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An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 21
September 2004
The Nostalgia Issue
Many of us will be re-uniting at South Hampstead on Sunday 5th September and so to get us suitably in the mood we have a number of nostalgic articles in this issue. Bill Hart picks his Dream Teams from the sixties, Dave Garrard describes the recent Old Grammarians bonding session and Gary Rhoades recalls being plucked from the score box to play for Shepherds Bush thirds in what was to be Bill Adams’ final appearance as a player.
The creditable performance of the English team in the test matches cannot pass unmentioned and is based on an all round improvement in batting, bowling, fielding and captaincy. Some may argue that the quality of the opposition may have been below par, but a feature of strong sides is that they make the opposition look mediocre.
Meanwhile, the Great Jack Morgan was outraged at the Professor’s taunting comments in the last issue directed towards his, my and indeed many other old fogeys’ views on Dumberer Cricket: “ Is the Professor arguing that because lots of people go to Dumberer matches that this makes them good cricket? Surely this is a ludicrous argument? Would he argue that because some crap pop record has been bought by thousands of eight year olds that this makes it good music? Wouldn’t we expect better from the Professor?”
Young Dave Myers told me recently that he had acquired the services of a bowling machine and so when I visited him in Much Wenlock I was interested to see where he was using it since his house is set into the side of a hill. He had utilized the services of a JCB and carved out a flat section behind the house and erected a net. The wicket was damp when I visited and there was not much evidence of Surrey Loam but his son, Edward, joined us and we were soon having a gentle work out in civvies. Did we use the bowling machine? No it wasn’t necessary - Dave’s nagging accuracy with the ball rendered the robot superfluous to our proceedings.
It used to be just rain that stopped play but Ian MacIntosh told me about a couple of unusual incidents at Milverton Road this season: “In G&C20 you mentioned a chap called Snapper who lives in Milverton road but plays for WGCCC. I actually played against him when he was playing for the Stoics at the club last month. Incidentally, play was halted for twenty minutes during the game when the fielding side rushed from the field of play due to the arrival of a traffic warden in Milverton Road, which is now a controlled parking area during the week and appropriate tickets were not being displayed on the vehicles.
There was another unusual interruption of play at South Hampstead this season in a match between Willesden Green Pakistan Community Centre and Nottingham Pakistani Community. This was when the Virgin Medical Helicopter Ambulance landed on the ground, as it was the nearest open space to a hotel in Willesden High Road where it had to get to. Once down, the medics were driven to the address by a South Hampstead member.”
Out and About with the Professor
We had a good result last Saturday that might be of passing interest. We played Millhillians again. If you recall Daren Sammy played in the away match earlier this season and I had assumed that having made the West Indies side, he would be doing more important things. Not so. There he was to open the bowling. Given that he got 5 for 25 in the first match there was some apprehension. However, he had James put down in the first over and thereafter was put to the sword, ending with 13-0-65-0. He is not super quick but is quick enough and does move the ball both ways. However the WGCCC opener (not James this time) batted so well that he was reduced to bowling bouncers, two of which disappeared into the bushes.
Interestingly, Millhillians also fielded a MCC Young Cricketer called O'Brien who fielded 12th man for England in the Lords test. So, apparently, did Sammy for the West Indies. So the opposition had two players in their team who had been 12th man for each of the two test sides in the same game. The Great Jack Morgan probably knows how many times this has happened before but I don't think I've ever heard of such a thing. We knocked off their 203 for 1 - so a good win.
I went to the last two days at Lords - saw Flintoff and Vaughan on the Sunday and the West Indies bowled out on the Monday. In the same weekend WGCCC won three out of four League matches and got through to the semi-final of the county cup. So I am a very happy chappy!
The Last Hurrah When I heard from Bill Hart a few months back he referred to an Old Grammarians reunion and so I wasn’t too surprised when Dave Garrrard sent me this
I still play very occasionally, and last weekend we had an Old Grammarian’s reunion cricket match in deepest Worcestershire. The average age of the team was 56. Roy Payne doesn't play at all now, and Mike Selvey might have played had he not been on duty at the Open at Troon. The Match was against The Lenches Cricket Club and was played at Church Lench, a village in the middle of nowhere about 5 miles north of Evesham, on Sunday 18th July. Most of us had not played nor seen each other for over ten years, and we called the match 'The Last Hurrah!'
John King is 72, and playing in this match, which was officially recognised as an Old Grammarians fixture, meant that he has now played for the OGs in seven decades! He and I used to open in the good old days! His old captain, Danny Smith, who often captained our midweek side at South Hampstead, presented him with an engraved tankard during the tea break. It was quite emotional!
The whole weekend was great. Most of us met up at a hotel in Evesham early on the Saturday evening and we had a great 'bonding session'. We went for a pre-booked curry at 9.00 p.m. at a long table for 22, and afterwards some carried on bonding (or re-bonding) back at the hotel.
Standing (L to R) Don Clarke (umpire), Rick Money, Dave Garrard,
Glenn Gershkoff, Niall Addison, Nick Phipps, Dave Boynton, Chris Garrard, Cathy Clarke (scorer - wife of Don).
Seated: Andy Frost, John King, Derek Lawrence, Dave Mowlam, Peter Finucane.
The match itself started at 12.00 and was eventually rained off at about
5.00 p.m. We had time to get them out for 191; and we were about 100 for 2 when the rain came. John opened and scored 31 to prove he hasn't lost it although his running between the wickets wasn't up to much.
Following the match, we were led to a delightful country pub serving real ale and good food, and then some went home while others headed back to Evesham for yet more 'bonding' and a second night in the hotel. Following a 'full English' on the Monday morning, those of us who were left headed back up the M40. It was generally considered to be a fantastic weekend, and the 'Next Last Hurrah' has already been provisionally arranged for the equivalent weekend in 2005. We're playing Cheriton Fitzpaine CC on Saturday 16th July. Spectators will be welcome but they'd have to do a lot of bonding!
I asked Bill Hart whether he had attended this notable event and he confessed that he had experienced a “senior moment” and forgotten about it completely
Are we as good as it seems?
I posed this question to George and the Professor. George replied first:
When England were struggling against better opposition, it always seemed to me that they could have a good session or so, but not string them together. Now it seems that the reverse is true, with both New Zealand and the West Indies having decent periods, but then failing to capitalise. Is this the key to success and failure?
Then I received this from the Professor:
I suppose the literal answer must be "yes". Given the run of results since the Ashes tour, we could hardly have done much better. There may be some doubts about the strength of the opposition but you can only play whom you do and there were very few doubts, before the series, that the New Zealand side were competitive. Indeed, I think we all took the view that it would be close.
For me the thing that has changed is the bowling. I guess "The Durham Sprayer" must have read your journal and reacted to the sobriquet in the best possible way. In a sense, it doesn't seem too difficult - bowl at high pace, hit the seam, and pitch it on or just outside the off stump! That's what Glen McGrath has been doing for years, to very good effect. The other seamers have all bowled a much better line in recent games. Add to that the newfound ability of Giles to spin the ball - and we have an attack! I can't decide whether the Giles renaissance is a result of him doing something different or the change in the pitches. Certainly at Lords the ball turned for Banks on the first morning. Who ever heard of the ball spinning on the first day of a test?
The other big plus must be Strauss who looks like an old-style test player, albeit still scoring at a break-neck pace, in that he doesn’t appear to want to get out. Trescothick, Butcher, Key and Flintoff all seem to play too freely for test match conditions.
*
My own view is that the English side has made considerable advances but will be tested both in South Africa this winter and, of course, by the Australians next summer. A measure of the player’s individual progress can be viewed by seeing how many of them would be selected today for a combined England/Australia side. I suspect that only Harmison and Flintoff would get the nod.
When an Old Cricketer leaves the crease
Gary Rhoades sent me this reminiscence from his formative years
The Professor’s comment on scorers being asked to play at the last moment in a recent G&C reminded me of the occasion of his father’s last match for the Bush. I was scoring a 1st XI match at East Acton Lane when told I’d have to give that up and go and play for the 3rd XI at Woburn Green.
I don’t know when Bill Adams had previously last played for SBCC but I certainly couldn’t recall him playing. The game ‘ away to Woburn Green’ was to be his last match. In saying goodbye to Bill it must be added that there were three Bush debutants that day. These were Vic Rhoades (48), George Dennistoun (similar sort of age) and a twentyish newcomer called John Tickner. If this sounds a strange side it certainly was and can only be explained by the fact that the Barnsdales were on holiday.
In the mid sixties the Barnsdale family was the backbone of the 3rd XI. Len Senior was wicketkeeper captain, whilst son Len Junior was an opening batsman. At the same time younger brother Alan was a fairly useful medium pace bowler and they were joined by their younger brothers, Stephen and John. Anyway the hordes of Barnsdales were not with us and as we left East Acton Lane in a John Darbon driven coach a dapper and excitable George Dennistoun started regaling us with stories of his last game; when he ‘scored runs with Parfitt’. As my father mumbled later ‘ he got bugger all today’.
This was a scratch game as it had been set up at the last moment and no one could remember playing against Woburn Green before. But their facilities were quite good and they were a fair side. They also had good support and, having elected to bat, Woburn were soon hammering our woefully weak attack to all parts of the ground to much applause. After an hour they had a hundred on the board and we had our hands full in the field. Jim Revier, our scorer, also had his hands full with Denis. Denis was a lovely chap of about 17 who became extremely excited every time Woburn Green scored a run and would cry out ‘I’ll put the scores up’. This was quite amusing for about 10 minutes but over the next two hours became a bit wearisome.
After they had amassed their first hundred John Darbon took himself off and asked John Tickner to have a bowl. It is always interesting when a newcomer to a club plays his first innings or has his first bowl and this was no exception. He briskly paced out a run of 12 or 14 paces and then turned and ran in half of his run in a most athletic manner such that a few eyes met in the field. This looked promising! John was just under 6ft, fresh faced, blond and slim. And it remained promising for the first 10 paces of his run up. Then in his penultimate stride his head jerked back somewhere in the direction of mid-on and in his last stride he contorted his body so that his arm came over backwards and from somewhere near his left ear. The ball hammered into the turf about four feet from the bowling crease and trickled towards the covers. It was at its closest point to the facing batsman when it left the bowler’s hand.
I was fielding at wide mid-off and my father was at deep point. The ball eventually came to rest about 5 yards from his feet. He couldn’t pick the ball up as he was trying to control his emotions. With his knees bent forward his shoulders were rising and falling in waves of repressed hilarity. I was no better but had at least had much useful training in school assemblies when the school orchestra played. There was no such ‘holding back’ from Bill and his deep, rich, throaty laugh emanated from somewhere near gully. The facing batsman was nonplussed as was the umpire who eventually signaled a wide.
It would have been kind to have stopped John from bowling another ball, claiming a dislocated shoulder or sudden dementia madness, but he did finish his over. It took 14 balls and about 10 minutes. By the end of that over all the Bush team were wracked with laughter and in no fit state to continue. But continue we did and really things didn’t get much worse. Woburn strode on to about 250 for not very many and we replied with about 80. Geoff Cleaver top scored which was usually a sign that we hadn’t scored many. As I said before, George got a duck and he and John Tickner were not asked to turn out again. My father, who I hadn’t seen play cricket outside of our garden, scored a few very slowly and surprisingly this wasn’t his last game. He turned out a year later in late September to accompany John Hatfield in their last games for the Bush. I’m afraid I can’t remember Bill’s innings, which is a shame, but I’ll never forget that laugh.
Dream Team Bill Hart sent me this to help you all get in nostalgic mode for 5th September
Recently, whilst re-reading the back editions of “Googlies and Chinamen” I noticed that Jim has occasionally mentioned one or other of his old South Hampstead colleagues and referred to him as the “best of his type that he had ever played with”. This stimulated me to look back over the twelve seasons (1962-73) that I spent at Milverton Road, in order to select an eclectic South Hampstead 1st XI.
Sadly, my first move was to select myself. Before coming to that conclusion, I tried to be objective and consider the merits of the various opening bowlers throughout the period, but my conceit kept getting in my way, and eventually it triumphed. From the outset I discounted Ron Hooker and Dick Richardson because they were professionals.
During the period under review, there were many very good players who almost got into my eleven. Colin Price, John Weale, Bruce Tutton and Jim Sharp were splendid batsmen and great team men. As an opening bowler, Don Wallis was a tremendous trier, never knowing when a cause was lost. Alan Cox was an extremely talented slow left armer, but he never fulfilled his potential until after my retirement. Although he only played for one season, Dick Boothroyd almost got in. An astonishing bowler, off about six yards run-up, he was quite fast, and seemed to bowl continuous straight yorkers.
I am bound to have missed someone and will probably be kicking myself later but here is my selected team, in batting order. The choice of captain, Bob Peach, is obvious, and I suppose I would be collecting the tea money.
Terry Cordaroy, Robin Ager (wicket keeper), Bob Peach, Len Stubbs, Alvin Neinow, George Cole, John Tutton, Ian Jerman, Bill Hart, Roy Phipps, Ossie Burton.
The first seven were all extremely accomplished batsmen, and there could scarcely be a better number eight than Ian Jerman. The wicket keeping would be of the highest class, and a bowling attack of Jerman, Hart, Burton, Peach, Phipps and Tutton (not to mention Cole), would even give a Hornsey eclectic team plenty to think about.
I was delighted to receive this from Bill and immediately emailed him back asking him to select a team for his SH Superstars to play against
Following on from my Dream Team of “South Hampstead players from my era (1962-73)” the editor has asked me to turn my attention to selecting a similar team from my opponents. This is a much more difficult task because a selection which is already subjective, may be rendered even more distorted by the form that the individual was in, at the time of the meeting. However, it was an interesting challenge, and here are the results. Immediately one is spoilt for choice, and it becomes essential to clear the mind by eliminating certain candidates. For example, although he would be in most people’s team, sadly I never played against Ian Bedford, so he must be left out.
Also excluded are those who spent a long time in Test or County cricket. This takes out Raman Subba Row (O.Whitgiftians), John Price (Wembley), Mike Brearley (Brentham), Graham Barlow (Brentham), Keith Jones (Shepherds Bush) & Ted Clark (Teddington).
When my list was finished it was obvious that some very good players had not been included. They included Brentham’s Roger Kingdon (because he was only very young by the time that I retired), and the following: - John Taylor (Wanstead), John Swann (Brentham), Peter Ray (Wembley), Bob Fisher (Ealing), Eaton Swabey (Mitcham), John Slack (UCS Old Boys) Keith Salter (Maidenhead & Bray), Norman Parks (Beddington) & David Straw (O.Whitgiftians).
Eventually the choice was made, and the following (in batting order) would be a very good match for my South Hampstead Dream Team: -
Alan Dey (Hornsey), Trevor Rosier (Dulwich), Roger Pearman (Hornsey), David Heyes (Finchley), Neville Griffin (Beddington), Hugh Pearman (Hornsey), Alan Coxon (Ealing), Alan Price (Ealing), Mike Sturt (Brondesbury) (wkt), Dennis Marriott (Mitcham), Brian Read (Brentham). 12th man Roy Cutler (Shepherds Bush).
That’s a hell of a side! Four fine seam bowlers in Read, Marriott, Griffin & Rosier. Great spin in Price and H.Pearman, and a very dangerous left arm “cutter” bowler in Coxon. Solid batting would be provided by both the Pearmans & Dey, and terrific hitting from Heyes, Rosier, Griffin & Coxon. I think they would beat us three times in five, but it would be a hell of a series!
More Bad Behaviour
When I visited WGCCC during their cricket week the Professor pointed out that the Bad Behaviour referred to in G&C19 was mild compared to that encountered in today’s club cricket. I suggested that club Presidents might be responsible for saying what would or would not be acceptable but he was quick to respond that it was down to the cricket committee.
I then received this from him:
You will be pleased to know that WGCCC completed their second win this year over Sawbridgeworth but it was such an ill-tempered game that it caused their Club Captain to write to ours. Our Club Captain, Terry, doesn't feel entirely secure with the written word, so I drafted the reply for him.
I have edited this a little for reasons of brevity
Dear Mr. Meadmore,
Thank you for your letter of 7th July. I think we can both agree about some matters, principally that a good game of cricket, played by some talented cricketers was marred by what appeared to be quite unacceptable behaviour on the part of some of the players. For spectators it is always difficult to know what is said in the middle some 60 or 70 yards away. Moreover, the accounts given by participants are not, to put it bluntly, characterised by objectivity. However some things seem to be clear:
First, all the incidents that you refer to happened during the WGCCC innings, i.e., when there were only two WGCCC players on the pitch at any one time.
Secondly, all the WGCCC batsmen reported being subject to a stream of foul-mouthed abuse from, but not exclusively, the Sawbridgeworth wicket keeper. Several of our players have considerable experience of cricket at many levels and are far from fading flowers themselves; however, they all reported disgusting, foul and abusive language being used persistently and incessantly. For example, Stewart Page, who opened the innings, got off the mark with a boundary hit all along the ground. The bowler followed through to within a yard or two of him and said: “You cunt”.
However, it is of Martin James’ behaviour that you complain. I have spoken to Martin and he is quite blunt in recounting what he said. He “pulled away” from a couple of deliveries because of movement behind the screen. The wicket keeper’s response was: “Who the fuck are you then, some first class fucking cricketer”. Martin’s reply (doubtless enhanced by obscene epithets) was to suggest that he (Martin) had had a sexual relationship with the wicket keeper’s mother. This remark was as objectionable as it was risible. Martin did not know the player let alone his mother, who is doubtless an Australian housewife of unimpeachable character. However, it was intended to offend and clearly did so. It was an utterly indefensible remark for which we unreservedly apologise. Martin has been spoken to about the incident and warned about his future conduct. It is, while self-evidently ludicrous, vulgar, childish and offensive to say such things. It is not the type of remark that should be spoken by anyone, least of all a former captain of the Club and the County who does, as it happens, have first class experience.
What no one can determine without question is the sequence of these events. But we utterly refute the suggestion that Martin instigated the slanging match. Frankly, it is naïve in the extreme to suppose that Martin made his remark unprompted and entirely unprovoked. Indeed some flavour of the provocation can be judged from the incident when Martin was bowled a “beamer”. It may have been accidental, but the wicket keeper’s comment to the bowler, overheard by both our players was: “Hard luck, Sam. Don’t know how you missed this cunt’s big head”.
When Martin was out to a smart catch at mid-off, a huddle quite naturally formed around the fielder to congratulate him. Martin had to pass the group on his way to the pavilion and when he did so a diminutive dark-hair player detached himself from the group and chose to “accompany” Martin part of the way with demonstrative and sarcastic applause, right under his nose. Unlike the “who said what” discussion, this could be clearly seen from all round the ground. Moreover, there was no cricket-related justification for this piece of truculence – Martin was out, and was a third of the way to the pavilion. It was a deliberate and puerile attempt to provoke.
As I have already said, it is not possible, from beyond the boundary, to get a definitive view of who said what to whom. We shall have to wait for the umpires’ report. What is clear to me is that there was some unacceptable behaviour on both sides. We are not naïve, and I can recall some forthright exchanges in the past with Messrs Dash, Abbey, et al. which were regarded as part of the game and were settled with a handshake and a pint after the game. However, I’m sure that we both agree that that is a far cry from a sustained, relentless stream of filthy remarks which have no place in the game.
Lastly, I very much hope that these incidents and the resulting correspondence do nothing to harm the good relations between our respective clubs which have been built up over many years and still exist. Our President, for example, tells me that he was made most welcome at Sawbridgeworth earlier this year, and at least one of our senior members has warm and happy memories of his time as a Sawbridgeworth player.
Yours sincerely,
The Professor finished with this:
As you might imagine, we were all a bit worried about last Saturday’s third game against Sawbridgeworth. In the event, we bowled them out for 100 and knocked them off in 20 overs. Who scored the winning runs? Had to be, didn't it...Martin James.
Bush Belles - All, or at least some, of the answers Gary Rhoades tells me that the unknown young lady in the front row of the picture published G&C20 was Linda Macguire. He continued: “She went to the same junior school as the Great Jack Morgan, Dave Perrin, Jim Revier and me. They're wearing that kit because whites didn't suit them. I was scorer for that event which was a 6 over a side cricket match that I think took place on an evening of Cricket Week in1966. The gents batted and bowled left handed from memory unless of course they were left-handed! Beats Twenty20.”
Irritating trends in modern cricket-number 20 Nobody minds whether Channel 4 televises test cricket or not. Indeed, it makes it accessible to some of you, such as the Great Jack Morgan, who will have nothing of Uncle Rupert’s offerings. However, what is outrageous is that they dictate to the ECB the playing hours so that their early evening soap operas, or more particularly their audiences, are not disrupted.
Test matches should start at 11.30am with lunch at 1.30 and tea at 4.15pm. The pathetic needs of this broadcasting authority result in play beginning at 10.30am when civilized people are still at the breakfast table, lunch being taken at 12.30pm when we are still wiping the elevenses biscuit crumbs from our chins, and tea at 3.10pm when the port is still circulating.
The only redeeming feature of these absurd arrangements is that because the overs are bowled so slowly and, north of Lords, it always rains, play often goes over the scheduled finish and all their dictatorial plans are foiled.
Bad Grounds- the Scrubs revisited The Great Jack Morgan pointed out that it was actually Bill Adams, the Professor’s dad, who organized the games at Wormwood Scrubs prison, as a result of his links through Hammersmith library. He went on to add: “The water-filled tennis balls were hopeless for spinning, flighting or swinging, so I essayed some Doug Slade-style off-cutters and found them surprisingly effective; in fact, I was employed primarily as a bowler at the prison and batted down the order. When I did get to the wicket, my favourite shot, I recall, became the 2 runs awarded for hitting the ball down into the dungeons square of the wicket. We might have repaired to East Acton Lane on that occasion, but there was, in fact, a bar in Len’s sports and social club just outside the gates and we enjoyed the facilities there more than once…. the crumpet wasn’t up to much though.”
Re-union at South Hampstead
The re-union at South Hampstead on Sunday 5th September will be taking place within a few days of this edition’s distribution. If you have not booked a place but would still like to join in please just come along. The event commences at noon and the buffet lunch will commence at 1pm. The charge for the event, including lunch, is £10. There will be a first team match against Paddington during the afternoon. The following have confirmed their attendance:
Bob and Diana Peach, Steve and Heather Thompson, Roy and Joyce Dodson, Bill and Gill Hart, Alvin and Helen Nienow, Robin and Carol Ager, Len Stubbs, Terry Cordaroy, Jim Sharp, Wynne Sharp, Wally and Di Barratt, Ken James, Roy Cutler, Geoff Cleaver, Allan Clain, Ian Jerman, Bob and Francis Denley, Russ Collins, Allen Bruton, Nigel Ross, John Bowerman, Ossie Burton, Lionel Haywood, Mike D’Silva, Paul Martin, Bob Baxter, Harry Rose, Alf Langley, Junior Gale, Ian MacIntosh, Laurie and Iris Huntley, Roy Phipps, David & Margaret Mindell, Dipak Parmar, Geoffrey Higgins, Alan May and his wife, Harry Compton and his wife, Ted Meade-King, Brian & Alison Fuller, Fred & Carol Perham, David Simpson, Jack Singman and Mary Hancock.
Sadly, Peter Huntley will be too ill to attend; Clive Coleman and Russell Bowes have had to cry off.
Strange Elevens
The Jazz Hat bunch in the last issue all qualified by virtue of their having been Young Cricketer of the Year. The Great Jack Morgan has compiled this month’s Strange XI from Middlesex players who were all born in Africa:
Andy Strauss
Sven Koenig
Ben Hutton
Jacques Kallis
Norman Featherstone
Jamie Dalrymple
Phil Edmonds
Vincent van der Bijl
Chad Keegan
Roddy Kinkead-Weekes
Nantie Hayward
He goes on to explain his selection criteria: “I quickly wrote down twelve names and was debating who to leave out, when I realised that Roddy had to be included otherwise you would have a go at me for not selecting a keeper. I therefore had to discard two and chose Compton who is showing encouraging signs of progress actually, but as he is not yet an established player, it was easy to leave him out. The other was Klusener whose bowling is clearly inferior to the other four pace bowlers selected, though there could be a case for including him instead of Dalrymple, but it was nice to get in someone who was born in Nairobi! Hutton is in the Strauss category of having returned to Blighty at an early age (and joined Strauss at Radley College, Durham University and Middlesex: will he also join him in the England team?), but Compton lived in South Africa until his late teens and speaks with a distinctive accent.”
Earlier Editions
I will be please to email you a copy of the earlier editions of Googlies & Chinamen, if you missed or have mislaid them. If you received this edition through a third party, please send me your email address to ensure that you get on the main mailing list for future editions.
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