GOOGLIES & CHINAMEN
An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 5
May 2003
Bollocks & Goolies
I first met the Great Jack Morgan in September 1959 in Jim Purser’s 2L. I distinguished myself by throwing up over my new desk on the first day (one for Wullers). Over the next three years, I captained the U12, U13 & U14 at football whilst Jack captained at cricket. At football we did well with a strong defence and, in Bob Gregory and Bill Edmunds, two talented forwards who scored loads of goals.
At cricket we were serious, enthusiastic but crap. Given the vagaries of the short school season and the recurrent nature of the fixture list we seemed to play and get stuffed by Battersea Grammar each week, since they had some exceptional players including Mike Selvey, Roy Payne and Dave Garrard.
The school years above us weren’t much good either and at the tender age of fifteen Jack and I found ourselves in Mick Cope’s 1st XI, alongside Dick Bond, the Professor, Frank Foreman and Arthur Gates amongst others. We had four years together in the first eleven.
Later I went with Young Dave Myers to Jack’s 21st birthday celebrations in Sheffield where a joint celebrant was Frank Hayes, later of Lancs and England fame. After University Jack played at Shepherds Bush CC whilst I was at South Hampstead.
So I have known the Great Jack Morgan for a long time and I suppose that, although I have not heard from him for over twenty years, I should not be surprised on making contact that he referred to this distinguished organ rather inelegantly as “ Bollocks and Goolies”. In this issue Jack tells us what he’s been up to and which teams he will and won’t watch!
Meanwhile, my Mum has been furtively passing copies of earlier editions of this august journal to Don Palmer, the mathematician and soccer guru. Don has now graduated to the email fraternity, which leaves just Bob Cozens cyberless, but then he probably still uses baked bean cans and string for a telephone.
A number of you have been kind enough to say how helpful you found our explanation of the intricacies of the Duckworth Lewis Method. George and I have taken heart from this. I am seldom seen without a set of log tables and George invariably carries a slide rule in his top pocket to effect instant calculations. We have decided to delve deeper into this complex matter and will present further findings in the next issue. Meanwhile, if you need any clarification of specific aspects feel free to contact us.
Bob Proctor, who lives in Perth, will be visiting the UK in May and will be renewing old friendships, notably at Brentham. If you would like to see him whilst he is here contact him via Brentham CC.
I will continue to keep all recipients on the header sheet so that those of you who wish to make individual contact with each other can do so. Please keep sending news of other Old Danes and mutual contacts in club cricket and, wherever possible, their email addresses so that we can add them to the database for all to use.
The New Season In June the new Twenty Over Slugfest will be launched. The main problem is that the games will be so short that there won’t be enough time for the real fans of the shortened game to get drunk enough to facilitate their revolting and obnoxious behaviour. The start time for these thrashes is 5.30 and I suspect that the limited over junkies will find themselves having to get tanked up at lunchtime to enable them to be at full throttle for the opening overs. Which is OK for office whallers but less good for bus and taxi drivers.
We can expect a new range of tactics to evolve for these pointless frolics, including, for the sensible, feigned injuries to avoid participation. There will be broken bats, broken limbs, broken reputations and non-swinging white balls. Shahid Afridi will be the first batsman to score a hundred in the first ten overs and someone will work out that the only dot ball is an underarm grounder. And no one will give a toss. With luck it will be abandoned for next year.
*
Good Friday - The County Championship got underway with those well known Lancastrians, Mal Loye and Stuart Law, taking centuries off Surrey, the Professor and my favourites for the title. Middlesex were rolled over at Chelmsford, which doesn’t augur well for their season as batting is their relative long suit.
Easter Saturday – Yorkshire, without the help of an overseas player or the World’s top ranking batsman (Peg Leg), make their highest score ever.
Courtesy of Uncle Rupert, I watched Ponting and Lehman milking a mediocre West Indies attack in a partnership of over 300 at Port of Spain, Trinidad. The attack comprised Dillon, Collins, Drakes, Samuels and Bernard, who must constitute the weakest the West Indies have fielded for over thirty years. This reminds us that there is a cyclical nature to success and failure. We should not get too excited about England’s probable success this summer against Zimbabwe, South African and Pakistan who are all rebuilding. Will England rebuild or go back to the old lags? Will we see Hoggard and Anderson or Gough and Caddick? Will Thorpey find time in his busy domestic schedule or will the Professor’s pal Graveney be Australian and go for Shafayat?
Easter Sunday - Yorkshire win in three days and look far too strong for the second division.
Adam Gilchrist may be the best attacking batsman in the world; he already has eight test centuries and normally bats at seven, although he came in at five to oversee Pontings’ maiden test double-century. Ganga looks classy-he has time to play, a feature of all the great players and Lara led the fight back laying into the wrist spinners, Hogg and MacGill.
Easter Monday - Middlesex hold out at Chelmsford thanks to a hundred from Ed Joyce. The Great jack Morgan, who has first hand knowledge of these things, reckons that Joyce is the best of the foreigners currently qualifying to play for England. There is still talk of Emburey coming out of retirement to cover for Phil Tufnell – not even Fred Titmus was that old!
West Indies avoid the follow on, which was a major feat in itself, thanks to Ganga’s hundred and a good innings from Samuels.
Easter Tuesday - During the Hinds/Lara second innings century partnership, Tony Cozier embarks on a rambling anecdote about a Shell Shield player. He finally mentions that fielding captains found it difficult to get anyone to field at short-leg to him. Why, because he was a ferocious leg-side hitter? No, because he had a penchant for spitting over his left shoulder whilst at the crease.
Easter Wednesday - West Indies lose but Lara plays a magnificent innings on an arid strip that was puffing dust. MacGill was literally turning it square and the bounce varied from rearing to shooters. Lara may be even better than Tendulkar.
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Middlesex enjoy back-to-back wins against Sussex in the Championship and then against Derbyshire in the Sunday Slog. Perhaps this season won’t be agony after all, but we have to get the Rangers through the play-offs first.
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The media man of the century, Comical Ali, the former Iraqi War Spokesman, has been off the scene for a few weeks taking a crash course in cricket and has now been hired by Fletch and Nass to act as Spokesman for the England team this summer. Look out for his persuasive invective as he tries to convince you that the Durham Sprayer has never bowled a wide, that Big Ronnie is the answer to England’s number three batting position, and that seamers are wimps if they bowl with a third man or a fine leg.
The Very Last Word on the World Cup
George and I are big fans of the Welsh Wizard and it is, therefore, not surprising that we are making a special belated award to our Celtic hero. In the final week of the tournament he appeared in Uncle Rupert’s studios dressed in a matching diagonal patterned tie and shirt set. For this he wins the Sartorial Elegance Award. If anyone knows where to purchase such fine attire please contact the Professor, c/o University of Hertfordshire, whose wardrobe longs to be so enhanced.
The Cult of the Celebrity Umpire
When I turned out in whites we generally reckoned that the best umpires were those that you didn’t notice during the course of a game. Their decisions were conservative, their signals restrained and above all they were consistent. Everyone has his own story of school umpires whether it is the dictatorial headmaster, the exchange French master or a well, or less-well, meaning dad. But once you got beyond the lottery of school umpires, in the club game the standard was generally acceptable and the umpires kept in the background and let the game take front stage. So much so that the dubious ones were well known on the circuit.
However, first Dickie Bird and, more recently, David Shepherd believe that their duties in the first class game include entertaining the crowd in their own right. Fortunately, Shepherd’s obesity has restricted his ludicrous Long John Silver act, but the pipsqueak kiwi, Billy Bowden, has taken up the cudgel. This clown has invented a whole range of elaborate gestures that bring him to the forefront of proceedings for no good purpose.
To make matters worse the ICC has effectively approved his eccentricities by elevating him to their Elite Umpiring Panel. His flamboyant semaphore will now get even wider exposure. Why does it matter? Firstly, his every movement will be the centre of attention rather than the game itself and, secondly, the crowds will pick up his gestures and imitate them, creating yet another discomfort for those who are there to watch just the game.
So beware, we are entering the era of the Cult Celebrity Umpire. Look out for racy gestures, funny hats, jocular braces, beech shorts and shooting sticks this season, at all levels of the game, as umpires everywhere adopt bad habits to get themselves noticed.
Project Salvation
In a constant effort to solve the problems of English cricket I have launched Project Salvation. The Professor has previously tackled this tricky topic and so I decided to quiz him further. Here are his latest thoughts:
I haven't responded to your "Solving England's Problems" note. Principally because I don't think anyone can - especially an ageing, limping, short sighted, fat, bald, academic. However, as you know, I think the future of the game in a media age is almost solely dependent on the success of the national team. If they are not on the TV or the back pages why should boys take up the sport? I can't think of any friends (outside of my cricket club) who have sons who play cricket. While my club happens to be doing well at present, many are in real problems. Some have merged and some have simply folded. It is a classic case of over-supply. It would be far better, in my view, to have cricket on the BBC for less revenue but many more watchers. The money would not be there, however, to support the counties. So what do they do with it? And does what they do help to improve the national side?
You asked about Minor Counties and Second XIs. I know rather more about the former. Herts has one pro (David Ward - ex Surrey) as do most Minor Counties. In addition there are a variety of "expenses" arrangements - it is widely rumored that Steve Plumb, for example, has done well financially from playing for Lincoln. The rest of the players are club cricketers. The principal problem these days, for many Minor Counties, is fielding a team. Taking several days off work is a problem for many. The question is where does it all lead? Sure, several Herts players have gone on to play first class cricket and even play for England but it is difficult to see that their progression was linked to Minor County cricket or that the vast numbers of others are doing anything other than playing a few good-standard games of cricket. Nothing wrong with that, of course, but why fund it with Test match profits?
The bigger problem is, however, with the First Class Counties. Looking
through last year's Wisden, most counties seem to have a squad of about 25 (that's the number on average that appear in the team photos and I assume you have to have some sort of contract to get in the frame). 18 x 25 gives 450 people who each want to play 16 games of county cricket for money that (notwithstanding the Lords train spotters) nobody wants to watch. A large number of these people are not eligible to play for England or are never going to do so. A surprising proportion of county overseas players are not likely to play for their own country either. The Second XI competition appears to be little more than a joke. Wisden only just bothers to report it. It is "more suited to the ambitions of individuals...a free for all… allowing older contracted players to serve out their time...or first team players to regain form.... etc" Wisden reports 44 players being used by Middlesex in the 2001 "competition". (Wisden 2002 p 954).
A look at the squad photos is also informative. Yorkshire had 26 players in the picture of their 2001 squad - there is not a black face (not literally true, a Mr Seraj is the physiotherapist... of the Second Team).
My solution?
1 Sacrifice "Sky" money and get cricket back on the box
2 Reduce the size of county squads and scrap Second XI cricket
3 Remove funding for minor counties
4 Put all available cash into top-flight club cricket
5 Ensure that success at the top level of club cricket will lead to
selection for a county
6 Euthanise racists on county committees
Well there you are it’s easier than I thought! If you would like to contribute to the debate please feel free to send me your views. Project Salvation will continue until the Ashes are regained.
Simon Wilde, writing in the Sunday Times on Sunday 27th April, noted that 10% of professional cricketers qualified for the national team are now of Asian descent. Notts and Essex, with five and four respectively, lead the way. Usman Afzaal has already played for England alongside Nass and the teenage prodigy, Bilal Shafayat, should get a chance this season.
I responded to the Professor’s comments as follows:
How about making the Minor Counties Divisions 3 & 4, with promotion and
relegation to and from division 2. This would make Minor County cricket
serious and put the frighteners on the first class counties. Performance
would be that much more critical. Drop the silly one-day competitions and
keep the Gillette or whatever name it goes by these days. This would reduce the number of innings the batsmen would be able to play and consequently make them individually more important.
Second elevens then become just the stiffs to give match practice to those
not in the first eleven. Then we have a straight split nationally between
the club level and all the counties.
Then we have to address the big questions:
How do we bridge that gap at a playing level?
How do the Aussies do it?
Geoff Cleaver II
Our feature on Geoff Cleaver in the last issue prompted a number of you to respond. Mike Cope informs us that Dave Richardson (yes, him!) played cricket with Major Ronnie Ferguson, who died recently. Sadly Dave died several years ago and the Major arranged his funeral. The Professor was able to confirm this since Roy Cutler had told him that the Major had “organized” the funeral but was drunk throughout.
Mike Cope also had information about John Jackson (yes, him!), who apparently runs a curtain and blinds business in Brighton. There’s a joke there somewhere but I just couldn’t be bothered.
The Great Jack Morgan couldn’t believe that any review of Geoff Cleaver as a cricketer did not make reference to his appalling fielding. I like this concept and am trying to put together some thoughts on appalling fielders. Jack has already nominated Laurie Valentine, so you can’t have him!
Incidentally, I played for South Hampstead at Shepherds Bush in the match when Roy Cutler developed the “yips”. In an over which was never finished, bowled to Terry Cordaroy, the ball went all over the place, including straight up in the air. I believe that Roy never recovered his action and certainly never bowled fast again.
What’s he been up to?
The Great Jack Morgan updates us on his activities since his premature retirements from playing in 1974 and BT in 1998
I took advantage of frantic downsizing at BT and retired on 31 March 1998, and this has been the best thing that ever happened to me. I was a regular at Loftus Road until 3.5.94, which was the last first team game at which one was allowed to stand. I have not seen a first team game since, though I have been an irregular attendee at reserve games until this season when the stiffs were banished to Northwood in order to accommodate Fulham. Having finally given up the Rs, I also decided to give up the Isthmian (Ryman) League stuff that I have been watching in recent seasons and for the first time since the 1954/55 season, I have not seen a game this term. I still try to follow Rangers from afar, of course, but there is so little news coverage when you are in the second (third) division! I do not take any interest in the premier league or in international football and never watch it on television.
I am a life member of Middlesex CCC and attend first and second team championship matches at every opportunity, but I hardly ever go to the one-day stuff. I even go to minor counties matches sometimes. I never go to international cricket in this country: I began to hate the crowds, the drunks, the football chants, the spilt beer, the prices and I saw my last game in 1986.... it was the Mexican Wave that was the final straw.
Since retirement, however, I have taken to dropping in on the England winter tour for a couple of weeks each year. I have now been to South Africa, Sri Lanka, New Zealand and, yes, Australia. I missed JCA (the Professor) as I chose to go to Adelaide and Perth.... two excellent places to visit.... shame I had to watch the cricket really. I tend to avoid the sort of celebrity trips it appears that the Professor was on: you are paying for those boring bastards' free holidays!
I tend to take the JRS view in the domestic cricket debate. The second elevens and minor counties competitions allow counties to recruit their future first teams and therefore England's future teams; club standards are too far below county standards. However, there is too much emphasis on the national team anyway: I like county cricket for its own sake. Overseas players are necessary to maintain the quality in county cricket with so many players absent because of central contracts.
Graveney, in my view, does not do any real selecting - Hussain and Fletcher do that. It is daft to think that Hussain and Fletcher do not get who they want for the team. The role of Graveney and Miller is to go and have a look at people that H & F are considering for the team. Selection blunders should be blamed on Hussain and Fletcher.
Since renewing contact with the Great Jack Morgan, he has been a regular correspondent and I shall include more of his forthright views in future editions
Batting with Roger As a teenager, I always found it so difficult to hit the ball off the square that I discovered that one of the only ways to score any runs at all was to become a practitioner of the quick single. Anyone who batted with me soon became aware that if I made contact the chances were I would be galloping down the wicket towards them.
The first time I batted with Roger Kingdon was when he made his first team debut at the age of thirteen. He came into bat at about number six, soon after I had arrived at the crease. Unfortunately, no one had told him about me and I didn’t know that he couldn’t walk fast let alone run.
I pushed forward and made contact, yelled “Yes” and scampered down to the other end. It had been an easy quick single and so I was amazed to hear triumphant appeals from the other end. When I turned round Roger still hadn’t made it half way.
I don’t think it bothered Roger too much. He already had his own way of playing and soon nobody even tried to get him to run. They just let him get on with it and he obliged by becoming easily the heaviest scorer in school history. Unlike me.
Tired and Emotional
I was fascinated to read a report about the behaviour of UCB President, Percy Sonn, at the India/Holland World Cup Match, at Boland Park.
In a classic of euphemism, he is reported to have “fallen out of his trousers” in front of guests, including ECB Chairman, David Morgan.
He is further reported to have told friends “ I am a person who likes his liquor. I don’t know what I am supposed to have done. If I used foul language, it was probably suitable to the circumstances”!
Well, that’s all right then! I wish he had told us that years ago. It would have saved me decades of remorse after evenings of excessive alcoholic consumption.
Hit the forward button
One of the disadvantages of forwarding emails to others is that they get to find snippets of internal styles from whence they came. One such instance occurred recently when George forwarded me some tasteless jokes about the French, but in the narrative an earlier correspondent had suggested that the Good Dr Sharp might be interested in them. So mon frere, George, may now find himself with an alternative sobriquet.
The Professor kindly sent me a copy of the Welwyn Garden City CC fixture list and, lo and behold, he turns out to be the President! So he also has alternative nomenclature, depending whether he is in Academic or Republican mode.
Just Like the Ivy It is impossible to categorise any reminiscence of South Hampstead without specifying whether it relates to the old or new pavilion era. The new pavilion was open for the 1966 season and much of the 1965 season was played strangely looking up the hill from temporary sheds erected alongside the tennis pavilion, which faced, understandably the other way towards the tennis courts.
The final seasons in the old pavilion witnessed the end of an era where players wore blazers to walk round the ground; there were no social members, only honorary ones; women were never seen in the pavilion after the tea ladies had left (except for Audrey Hawdon, the scorer, who was, for some strange reason, an honorary man); the beer came in wooden barrels, was served at room temperature, was never frothy and was either good (normally) or ullage; playing members were required to be of a standard and their applications for membership would not be considered if they did not so qualify.
When Bob Peach succeeded Alan Clain as South Hampstead’s 1st XI captain in 1961 he inherited a useful bunch of players: John Weale, Don Wallis, Roy Phipps, John & Bruce Tutton and the Young Terry Cordaroy. He boosted this assemblage through a recruiting drive that included Len Stubbs, his corporal in the Army, Robin Ager from Turnham Green, Alvin Nienow, a school contemporary, from Shepherd’s Bush and Bill Hart from the Old Grammarians. He was thus able to field a formidable side which played well together and hated losing.
A feature of life in the final seasons of the old pavilion era was post match singing. This was a mildish version of the rugby variety but was generally considered to be somewhat risqué. The leading songster in the early sixties sides was John Weale who looked sixty but was actually in his late twenties. Singing was restricted to special occasions and these would include a loss by the First XI. Defeat would require a rendition of the loser’s song “Just like the Ivy”. I can shed no light on the reasoning behind this selection, but it was taken extremely seriously and it was a rare and sad day when it was necessary.
I can recall one occasion when the “Ivy” was sung after an unlikely loss to Lensbury. Their leading run scorer on the day also had his straw hat set alight as part of the ritual.
Googlies Reunion
We were going to suggest a Googlies reunion at the Old Trafford day-nighter in June, but George and I are both away that week. So it’s up to the rest of you to suggest a suitable event that could be an International, a County game, a Club game or some other event or venue for those who feel so inclined to assemble. Don’t be shy, if you are going to it anyway a few others won’t make that much difference.
If you really want to get into organizing, how about a Googlies winter visit to the test matches? Jim Courtney will be happy to assist and advise anyone who is prepared to mastermind such a project. He can be contacted on www.skylinetravelshop.co.uk
The Surrey Stumper
In G&C 2, I suggested that the Surrey Stumper may have been given the England job for life and that we should look out for him developing idiosyncratic behaviour in his dotage.
The Professor described, in his thoughts on Premature Celebration, how in one of the tests last winter, while the team celebrated a caught behind before the decision has been given by the umpire, Stewarty, as they call him at the Oval, rolled the ball along the ground to the square leg umpire.
In the World Cup, after collecting Craig White’s throw and removing the bails to run out Brett Lee, he turned to the square leg umpire and appealed with both arms outstretched like an imprecating Italian opera singer.
I think he is only just getting into weirdness and if he can hold off the meager challenges of Foster, Read and the dark horse, Nash, we can expect some gems from him this summer.
Rangers Reminiscences
Back in the fifties the Rangers would enter the stadium from their Ellerslie Road changing room to the improbable and tinny sound of “Entry of the Gladiators” over the loudspeaker system.
On the other side of the ground, South Africa Road, a grassy bank backed the open terrace. At the foot of the bank was a primitive, rusted corrugated iron khasi. The ground between the foot of this bank and the turnstiles had a form of clinker underfoot. The brilliance of this landscaping was not clear until half time when the khasi was fully utilized and gallons of urine seeped under it and across the clinker, forming a particularly unpleasant puddle or small pond. However, by the end of the game this steaming deposit had disappeared.
Nowadays, the offices and changing rooms are located on this side of the ground, but on a warm day I bet the pungent aroma of piss still pervades the atmosphere.
The James Gang
Reference to the ambidextrous thrower, Kevan James, in the last issue prompted the Professor to report that last season he had acted as coach to Hertfordshire. He went onto to describe his brother, Martin, as an erstwhile yobbo who had played for his club, Welwyn Garden City, for the last decade. He sounded interesting and so I prompted the Professor to produce a little biography. This is what he sent:
Martin came to us from Southgate and Edmonton with a not entirely
unsullied reputation - indeed there were suggestions that it was far from a
wise move on our part. It has proved to be the opposite. Martin is very
good friends with Neil MacLaurin who was our Club Captain in the early
1990s. Neil played a few games for Middlesex and is the son of Lord
MacLaurin who in turn was captain of WGCCC when I joined in the early 1970s. They make a strange couple: the honourable N MacLaurin, public school, MCC, and apparently "establishment" and Martin James wide-boy first class.
Martin was a truly magnificent club cricketer - the most
destructive opening bat I have ever seen. He could make strong men (and
very good players) weep trying to bowl at him. He twice scored 180 in one season and got vast numbers of runs besides. I wasn't present, but people who were still remember him thrashing David Surridge to all parts of the Bishop
Stortford ground. Stortford had been national club champions and Dave, at
that time, had only just finished his county career and was far too good
for many quite reasonable club players - he was quick and very accurate,
Martin, of course, marched down the wicket to him. When he saw him coming, Surridge bowled it very short and very quick. People who were there have the memory of our opening bat, half way down the track, rocking gently on to the back foot and hooking the ball out of the ground.
My own enduring image is of Herts v Gloucestershire in the Nat West at
Bristol. First over, Courtney Walsh runs up to bowl, Martin hits him
straight back over his head down the ground for 4. You could sort of tell
that Courtney wasn't very pleased.
About half a dozen or so years ago I opened the batting with Martin in an
end of the season club game. The first team captain and old git
combination. I remember snicking the ball for the two that bought up our
hundred partnerships for the first wicket - it also (just) got me into
double figures. Martin would shout at the opening bowler that he was
bowling too full at the same moment as he was lifting it over the sightscreen.
Martin captained the County in the last couple of years but did not have a
very good side and was somewhat past his best. He is still, however, a world champion sledger.
Since submitting these notes the Professor informs me that Martin scored a hundred for WGCCC in the opening game of this season.
Irritating Trends in Modern Cricket-Number 4
The commentators are responsible for an unnecessary and vulgar range of terminology that is unfortunately creeping into popular usage. Seam bowlers now jag the ball off the wicket. Why? What was wrong with the ball moving off the seam and being described as an off or leg cutter?
When one of the wielders of a 4-pound bat clubs it over the ropes the Ghastly Greig or Bob Willis will cry out “It’s a Maximum”. No its not, it’s a six and, moreover, what is a three with four overthrows - a super-maximum?
Do us all a favour and never repeat these awful terms and thereby help to keep them out of common usage.
Strange Elevens
Here is a real ragbag of individuals who make up this edition’s Jazz Hat eleven:
Bill Athey – Yorks & Gloucs
Sid Russell – Middlesex
Mike Smith – Warwicks
Peter May – Surrey
Brian Parsons - Surrey
Jason Gallian – Lancs & Notts
Ian Salisbury – Sussex & Surrey
Phil de Freitas – most counties
Mike Selvey – Surrey & Middlesex
Phil Tufnell – Middlesex
David Larter – Northants
What is the common denominator of this bunch? To save you asking, Sid can keep wicket.
Rangers Links
The Great Jack Morgan informs me that the Rangers midfield player, Richard Langley, who scored a hat trick at Blackpool, is not related to Jim “The Crab” Langley or to Arthur Longbottom who changed his name to Langley, by deed poll. However, he is none other than the son of Mike Langley, the South Hampstead wicket–keeper batsman of the seventies. This, of course, makes him the nephew of Big Alf, originally of South Hampstead, who captained the Bush at that time.
For the completists amongst you Richard’s full name is Richard Barrington Michael Langley. But if you are a completist I guess you knew that anyway.
Did you miss the earlier editions?
I will be please to email you a copy of the earlier editions of Googlies & Chinamen, if you missed them. You will be able to find out who George and the Professor are, who named him the Great Jack Morgan, all about Tour Madness, a detailed run down on the Duckworth Lewis method and other trivia that is essential to your understanding of the modern game. Just send me an email to secure your copies.
If you received this edition through a third party, please send me your email address to ensure that you get on the main mailing list for future editions.
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An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 5
May 2003
Bollocks & Goolies
I first met the Great Jack Morgan in September 1959 in Jim Purser’s 2L. I distinguished myself by throwing up over my new desk on the first day (one for Wullers). Over the next three years, I captained the U12, U13 & U14 at football whilst Jack captained at cricket. At football we did well with a strong defence and, in Bob Gregory and Bill Edmunds, two talented forwards who scored loads of goals.
At cricket we were serious, enthusiastic but crap. Given the vagaries of the short school season and the recurrent nature of the fixture list we seemed to play and get stuffed by Battersea Grammar each week, since they had some exceptional players including Mike Selvey, Roy Payne and Dave Garrard.
The school years above us weren’t much good either and at the tender age of fifteen Jack and I found ourselves in Mick Cope’s 1st XI, alongside Dick Bond, the Professor, Frank Foreman and Arthur Gates amongst others. We had four years together in the first eleven.
Later I went with Young Dave Myers to Jack’s 21st birthday celebrations in Sheffield where a joint celebrant was Frank Hayes, later of Lancs and England fame. After University Jack played at Shepherds Bush CC whilst I was at South Hampstead.
So I have known the Great Jack Morgan for a long time and I suppose that, although I have not heard from him for over twenty years, I should not be surprised on making contact that he referred to this distinguished organ rather inelegantly as “ Bollocks and Goolies”. In this issue Jack tells us what he’s been up to and which teams he will and won’t watch!
Meanwhile, my Mum has been furtively passing copies of earlier editions of this august journal to Don Palmer, the mathematician and soccer guru. Don has now graduated to the email fraternity, which leaves just Bob Cozens cyberless, but then he probably still uses baked bean cans and string for a telephone.
A number of you have been kind enough to say how helpful you found our explanation of the intricacies of the Duckworth Lewis Method. George and I have taken heart from this. I am seldom seen without a set of log tables and George invariably carries a slide rule in his top pocket to effect instant calculations. We have decided to delve deeper into this complex matter and will present further findings in the next issue. Meanwhile, if you need any clarification of specific aspects feel free to contact us.
Bob Proctor, who lives in Perth, will be visiting the UK in May and will be renewing old friendships, notably at Brentham. If you would like to see him whilst he is here contact him via Brentham CC.
I will continue to keep all recipients on the header sheet so that those of you who wish to make individual contact with each other can do so. Please keep sending news of other Old Danes and mutual contacts in club cricket and, wherever possible, their email addresses so that we can add them to the database for all to use.
The New Season In June the new Twenty Over Slugfest will be launched. The main problem is that the games will be so short that there won’t be enough time for the real fans of the shortened game to get drunk enough to facilitate their revolting and obnoxious behaviour. The start time for these thrashes is 5.30 and I suspect that the limited over junkies will find themselves having to get tanked up at lunchtime to enable them to be at full throttle for the opening overs. Which is OK for office whallers but less good for bus and taxi drivers.
We can expect a new range of tactics to evolve for these pointless frolics, including, for the sensible, feigned injuries to avoid participation. There will be broken bats, broken limbs, broken reputations and non-swinging white balls. Shahid Afridi will be the first batsman to score a hundred in the first ten overs and someone will work out that the only dot ball is an underarm grounder. And no one will give a toss. With luck it will be abandoned for next year.
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Good Friday - The County Championship got underway with those well known Lancastrians, Mal Loye and Stuart Law, taking centuries off Surrey, the Professor and my favourites for the title. Middlesex were rolled over at Chelmsford, which doesn’t augur well for their season as batting is their relative long suit.
Easter Saturday – Yorkshire, without the help of an overseas player or the World’s top ranking batsman (Peg Leg), make their highest score ever.
Courtesy of Uncle Rupert, I watched Ponting and Lehman milking a mediocre West Indies attack in a partnership of over 300 at Port of Spain, Trinidad. The attack comprised Dillon, Collins, Drakes, Samuels and Bernard, who must constitute the weakest the West Indies have fielded for over thirty years. This reminds us that there is a cyclical nature to success and failure. We should not get too excited about England’s probable success this summer against Zimbabwe, South African and Pakistan who are all rebuilding. Will England rebuild or go back to the old lags? Will we see Hoggard and Anderson or Gough and Caddick? Will Thorpey find time in his busy domestic schedule or will the Professor’s pal Graveney be Australian and go for Shafayat?
Easter Sunday - Yorkshire win in three days and look far too strong for the second division.
Adam Gilchrist may be the best attacking batsman in the world; he already has eight test centuries and normally bats at seven, although he came in at five to oversee Pontings’ maiden test double-century. Ganga looks classy-he has time to play, a feature of all the great players and Lara led the fight back laying into the wrist spinners, Hogg and MacGill.
Easter Monday - Middlesex hold out at Chelmsford thanks to a hundred from Ed Joyce. The Great jack Morgan, who has first hand knowledge of these things, reckons that Joyce is the best of the foreigners currently qualifying to play for England. There is still talk of Emburey coming out of retirement to cover for Phil Tufnell – not even Fred Titmus was that old!
West Indies avoid the follow on, which was a major feat in itself, thanks to Ganga’s hundred and a good innings from Samuels.
Easter Tuesday - During the Hinds/Lara second innings century partnership, Tony Cozier embarks on a rambling anecdote about a Shell Shield player. He finally mentions that fielding captains found it difficult to get anyone to field at short-leg to him. Why, because he was a ferocious leg-side hitter? No, because he had a penchant for spitting over his left shoulder whilst at the crease.
Easter Wednesday - West Indies lose but Lara plays a magnificent innings on an arid strip that was puffing dust. MacGill was literally turning it square and the bounce varied from rearing to shooters. Lara may be even better than Tendulkar.
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Middlesex enjoy back-to-back wins against Sussex in the Championship and then against Derbyshire in the Sunday Slog. Perhaps this season won’t be agony after all, but we have to get the Rangers through the play-offs first.
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The media man of the century, Comical Ali, the former Iraqi War Spokesman, has been off the scene for a few weeks taking a crash course in cricket and has now been hired by Fletch and Nass to act as Spokesman for the England team this summer. Look out for his persuasive invective as he tries to convince you that the Durham Sprayer has never bowled a wide, that Big Ronnie is the answer to England’s number three batting position, and that seamers are wimps if they bowl with a third man or a fine leg.
The Very Last Word on the World Cup
George and I are big fans of the Welsh Wizard and it is, therefore, not surprising that we are making a special belated award to our Celtic hero. In the final week of the tournament he appeared in Uncle Rupert’s studios dressed in a matching diagonal patterned tie and shirt set. For this he wins the Sartorial Elegance Award. If anyone knows where to purchase such fine attire please contact the Professor, c/o University of Hertfordshire, whose wardrobe longs to be so enhanced.
The Cult of the Celebrity Umpire
When I turned out in whites we generally reckoned that the best umpires were those that you didn’t notice during the course of a game. Their decisions were conservative, their signals restrained and above all they were consistent. Everyone has his own story of school umpires whether it is the dictatorial headmaster, the exchange French master or a well, or less-well, meaning dad. But once you got beyond the lottery of school umpires, in the club game the standard was generally acceptable and the umpires kept in the background and let the game take front stage. So much so that the dubious ones were well known on the circuit.
However, first Dickie Bird and, more recently, David Shepherd believe that their duties in the first class game include entertaining the crowd in their own right. Fortunately, Shepherd’s obesity has restricted his ludicrous Long John Silver act, but the pipsqueak kiwi, Billy Bowden, has taken up the cudgel. This clown has invented a whole range of elaborate gestures that bring him to the forefront of proceedings for no good purpose.
To make matters worse the ICC has effectively approved his eccentricities by elevating him to their Elite Umpiring Panel. His flamboyant semaphore will now get even wider exposure. Why does it matter? Firstly, his every movement will be the centre of attention rather than the game itself and, secondly, the crowds will pick up his gestures and imitate them, creating yet another discomfort for those who are there to watch just the game.
So beware, we are entering the era of the Cult Celebrity Umpire. Look out for racy gestures, funny hats, jocular braces, beech shorts and shooting sticks this season, at all levels of the game, as umpires everywhere adopt bad habits to get themselves noticed.
Project Salvation
In a constant effort to solve the problems of English cricket I have launched Project Salvation. The Professor has previously tackled this tricky topic and so I decided to quiz him further. Here are his latest thoughts:
I haven't responded to your "Solving England's Problems" note. Principally because I don't think anyone can - especially an ageing, limping, short sighted, fat, bald, academic. However, as you know, I think the future of the game in a media age is almost solely dependent on the success of the national team. If they are not on the TV or the back pages why should boys take up the sport? I can't think of any friends (outside of my cricket club) who have sons who play cricket. While my club happens to be doing well at present, many are in real problems. Some have merged and some have simply folded. It is a classic case of over-supply. It would be far better, in my view, to have cricket on the BBC for less revenue but many more watchers. The money would not be there, however, to support the counties. So what do they do with it? And does what they do help to improve the national side?
You asked about Minor Counties and Second XIs. I know rather more about the former. Herts has one pro (David Ward - ex Surrey) as do most Minor Counties. In addition there are a variety of "expenses" arrangements - it is widely rumored that Steve Plumb, for example, has done well financially from playing for Lincoln. The rest of the players are club cricketers. The principal problem these days, for many Minor Counties, is fielding a team. Taking several days off work is a problem for many. The question is where does it all lead? Sure, several Herts players have gone on to play first class cricket and even play for England but it is difficult to see that their progression was linked to Minor County cricket or that the vast numbers of others are doing anything other than playing a few good-standard games of cricket. Nothing wrong with that, of course, but why fund it with Test match profits?
The bigger problem is, however, with the First Class Counties. Looking
through last year's Wisden, most counties seem to have a squad of about 25 (that's the number on average that appear in the team photos and I assume you have to have some sort of contract to get in the frame). 18 x 25 gives 450 people who each want to play 16 games of county cricket for money that (notwithstanding the Lords train spotters) nobody wants to watch. A large number of these people are not eligible to play for England or are never going to do so. A surprising proportion of county overseas players are not likely to play for their own country either. The Second XI competition appears to be little more than a joke. Wisden only just bothers to report it. It is "more suited to the ambitions of individuals...a free for all… allowing older contracted players to serve out their time...or first team players to regain form.... etc" Wisden reports 44 players being used by Middlesex in the 2001 "competition". (Wisden 2002 p 954).
A look at the squad photos is also informative. Yorkshire had 26 players in the picture of their 2001 squad - there is not a black face (not literally true, a Mr Seraj is the physiotherapist... of the Second Team).
My solution?
1 Sacrifice "Sky" money and get cricket back on the box
2 Reduce the size of county squads and scrap Second XI cricket
3 Remove funding for minor counties
4 Put all available cash into top-flight club cricket
5 Ensure that success at the top level of club cricket will lead to
selection for a county
6 Euthanise racists on county committees
Well there you are it’s easier than I thought! If you would like to contribute to the debate please feel free to send me your views. Project Salvation will continue until the Ashes are regained.
Simon Wilde, writing in the Sunday Times on Sunday 27th April, noted that 10% of professional cricketers qualified for the national team are now of Asian descent. Notts and Essex, with five and four respectively, lead the way. Usman Afzaal has already played for England alongside Nass and the teenage prodigy, Bilal Shafayat, should get a chance this season.
I responded to the Professor’s comments as follows:
How about making the Minor Counties Divisions 3 & 4, with promotion and
relegation to and from division 2. This would make Minor County cricket
serious and put the frighteners on the first class counties. Performance
would be that much more critical. Drop the silly one-day competitions and
keep the Gillette or whatever name it goes by these days. This would reduce the number of innings the batsmen would be able to play and consequently make them individually more important.
Second elevens then become just the stiffs to give match practice to those
not in the first eleven. Then we have a straight split nationally between
the club level and all the counties.
Then we have to address the big questions:
How do we bridge that gap at a playing level?
How do the Aussies do it?
Geoff Cleaver II
Our feature on Geoff Cleaver in the last issue prompted a number of you to respond. Mike Cope informs us that Dave Richardson (yes, him!) played cricket with Major Ronnie Ferguson, who died recently. Sadly Dave died several years ago and the Major arranged his funeral. The Professor was able to confirm this since Roy Cutler had told him that the Major had “organized” the funeral but was drunk throughout.
Mike Cope also had information about John Jackson (yes, him!), who apparently runs a curtain and blinds business in Brighton. There’s a joke there somewhere but I just couldn’t be bothered.
The Great Jack Morgan couldn’t believe that any review of Geoff Cleaver as a cricketer did not make reference to his appalling fielding. I like this concept and am trying to put together some thoughts on appalling fielders. Jack has already nominated Laurie Valentine, so you can’t have him!
Incidentally, I played for South Hampstead at Shepherds Bush in the match when Roy Cutler developed the “yips”. In an over which was never finished, bowled to Terry Cordaroy, the ball went all over the place, including straight up in the air. I believe that Roy never recovered his action and certainly never bowled fast again.
What’s he been up to?
The Great Jack Morgan updates us on his activities since his premature retirements from playing in 1974 and BT in 1998
I took advantage of frantic downsizing at BT and retired on 31 March 1998, and this has been the best thing that ever happened to me. I was a regular at Loftus Road until 3.5.94, which was the last first team game at which one was allowed to stand. I have not seen a first team game since, though I have been an irregular attendee at reserve games until this season when the stiffs were banished to Northwood in order to accommodate Fulham. Having finally given up the Rs, I also decided to give up the Isthmian (Ryman) League stuff that I have been watching in recent seasons and for the first time since the 1954/55 season, I have not seen a game this term. I still try to follow Rangers from afar, of course, but there is so little news coverage when you are in the second (third) division! I do not take any interest in the premier league or in international football and never watch it on television.
I am a life member of Middlesex CCC and attend first and second team championship matches at every opportunity, but I hardly ever go to the one-day stuff. I even go to minor counties matches sometimes. I never go to international cricket in this country: I began to hate the crowds, the drunks, the football chants, the spilt beer, the prices and I saw my last game in 1986.... it was the Mexican Wave that was the final straw.
Since retirement, however, I have taken to dropping in on the England winter tour for a couple of weeks each year. I have now been to South Africa, Sri Lanka, New Zealand and, yes, Australia. I missed JCA (the Professor) as I chose to go to Adelaide and Perth.... two excellent places to visit.... shame I had to watch the cricket really. I tend to avoid the sort of celebrity trips it appears that the Professor was on: you are paying for those boring bastards' free holidays!
I tend to take the JRS view in the domestic cricket debate. The second elevens and minor counties competitions allow counties to recruit their future first teams and therefore England's future teams; club standards are too far below county standards. However, there is too much emphasis on the national team anyway: I like county cricket for its own sake. Overseas players are necessary to maintain the quality in county cricket with so many players absent because of central contracts.
Graveney, in my view, does not do any real selecting - Hussain and Fletcher do that. It is daft to think that Hussain and Fletcher do not get who they want for the team. The role of Graveney and Miller is to go and have a look at people that H & F are considering for the team. Selection blunders should be blamed on Hussain and Fletcher.
Since renewing contact with the Great Jack Morgan, he has been a regular correspondent and I shall include more of his forthright views in future editions
Batting with Roger As a teenager, I always found it so difficult to hit the ball off the square that I discovered that one of the only ways to score any runs at all was to become a practitioner of the quick single. Anyone who batted with me soon became aware that if I made contact the chances were I would be galloping down the wicket towards them.
The first time I batted with Roger Kingdon was when he made his first team debut at the age of thirteen. He came into bat at about number six, soon after I had arrived at the crease. Unfortunately, no one had told him about me and I didn’t know that he couldn’t walk fast let alone run.
I pushed forward and made contact, yelled “Yes” and scampered down to the other end. It had been an easy quick single and so I was amazed to hear triumphant appeals from the other end. When I turned round Roger still hadn’t made it half way.
I don’t think it bothered Roger too much. He already had his own way of playing and soon nobody even tried to get him to run. They just let him get on with it and he obliged by becoming easily the heaviest scorer in school history. Unlike me.
Tired and Emotional
I was fascinated to read a report about the behaviour of UCB President, Percy Sonn, at the India/Holland World Cup Match, at Boland Park.
In a classic of euphemism, he is reported to have “fallen out of his trousers” in front of guests, including ECB Chairman, David Morgan.
He is further reported to have told friends “ I am a person who likes his liquor. I don’t know what I am supposed to have done. If I used foul language, it was probably suitable to the circumstances”!
Well, that’s all right then! I wish he had told us that years ago. It would have saved me decades of remorse after evenings of excessive alcoholic consumption.
Hit the forward button
One of the disadvantages of forwarding emails to others is that they get to find snippets of internal styles from whence they came. One such instance occurred recently when George forwarded me some tasteless jokes about the French, but in the narrative an earlier correspondent had suggested that the Good Dr Sharp might be interested in them. So mon frere, George, may now find himself with an alternative sobriquet.
The Professor kindly sent me a copy of the Welwyn Garden City CC fixture list and, lo and behold, he turns out to be the President! So he also has alternative nomenclature, depending whether he is in Academic or Republican mode.
Just Like the Ivy It is impossible to categorise any reminiscence of South Hampstead without specifying whether it relates to the old or new pavilion era. The new pavilion was open for the 1966 season and much of the 1965 season was played strangely looking up the hill from temporary sheds erected alongside the tennis pavilion, which faced, understandably the other way towards the tennis courts.
The final seasons in the old pavilion witnessed the end of an era where players wore blazers to walk round the ground; there were no social members, only honorary ones; women were never seen in the pavilion after the tea ladies had left (except for Audrey Hawdon, the scorer, who was, for some strange reason, an honorary man); the beer came in wooden barrels, was served at room temperature, was never frothy and was either good (normally) or ullage; playing members were required to be of a standard and their applications for membership would not be considered if they did not so qualify.
When Bob Peach succeeded Alan Clain as South Hampstead’s 1st XI captain in 1961 he inherited a useful bunch of players: John Weale, Don Wallis, Roy Phipps, John & Bruce Tutton and the Young Terry Cordaroy. He boosted this assemblage through a recruiting drive that included Len Stubbs, his corporal in the Army, Robin Ager from Turnham Green, Alvin Nienow, a school contemporary, from Shepherd’s Bush and Bill Hart from the Old Grammarians. He was thus able to field a formidable side which played well together and hated losing.
A feature of life in the final seasons of the old pavilion era was post match singing. This was a mildish version of the rugby variety but was generally considered to be somewhat risqué. The leading songster in the early sixties sides was John Weale who looked sixty but was actually in his late twenties. Singing was restricted to special occasions and these would include a loss by the First XI. Defeat would require a rendition of the loser’s song “Just like the Ivy”. I can shed no light on the reasoning behind this selection, but it was taken extremely seriously and it was a rare and sad day when it was necessary.
I can recall one occasion when the “Ivy” was sung after an unlikely loss to Lensbury. Their leading run scorer on the day also had his straw hat set alight as part of the ritual.
Googlies Reunion
We were going to suggest a Googlies reunion at the Old Trafford day-nighter in June, but George and I are both away that week. So it’s up to the rest of you to suggest a suitable event that could be an International, a County game, a Club game or some other event or venue for those who feel so inclined to assemble. Don’t be shy, if you are going to it anyway a few others won’t make that much difference.
If you really want to get into organizing, how about a Googlies winter visit to the test matches? Jim Courtney will be happy to assist and advise anyone who is prepared to mastermind such a project. He can be contacted on www.skylinetravelshop.co.uk
The Surrey Stumper
In G&C 2, I suggested that the Surrey Stumper may have been given the England job for life and that we should look out for him developing idiosyncratic behaviour in his dotage.
The Professor described, in his thoughts on Premature Celebration, how in one of the tests last winter, while the team celebrated a caught behind before the decision has been given by the umpire, Stewarty, as they call him at the Oval, rolled the ball along the ground to the square leg umpire.
In the World Cup, after collecting Craig White’s throw and removing the bails to run out Brett Lee, he turned to the square leg umpire and appealed with both arms outstretched like an imprecating Italian opera singer.
I think he is only just getting into weirdness and if he can hold off the meager challenges of Foster, Read and the dark horse, Nash, we can expect some gems from him this summer.
Rangers Reminiscences
Back in the fifties the Rangers would enter the stadium from their Ellerslie Road changing room to the improbable and tinny sound of “Entry of the Gladiators” over the loudspeaker system.
On the other side of the ground, South Africa Road, a grassy bank backed the open terrace. At the foot of the bank was a primitive, rusted corrugated iron khasi. The ground between the foot of this bank and the turnstiles had a form of clinker underfoot. The brilliance of this landscaping was not clear until half time when the khasi was fully utilized and gallons of urine seeped under it and across the clinker, forming a particularly unpleasant puddle or small pond. However, by the end of the game this steaming deposit had disappeared.
Nowadays, the offices and changing rooms are located on this side of the ground, but on a warm day I bet the pungent aroma of piss still pervades the atmosphere.
The James Gang
Reference to the ambidextrous thrower, Kevan James, in the last issue prompted the Professor to report that last season he had acted as coach to Hertfordshire. He went onto to describe his brother, Martin, as an erstwhile yobbo who had played for his club, Welwyn Garden City, for the last decade. He sounded interesting and so I prompted the Professor to produce a little biography. This is what he sent:
Martin came to us from Southgate and Edmonton with a not entirely
unsullied reputation - indeed there were suggestions that it was far from a
wise move on our part. It has proved to be the opposite. Martin is very
good friends with Neil MacLaurin who was our Club Captain in the early
1990s. Neil played a few games for Middlesex and is the son of Lord
MacLaurin who in turn was captain of WGCCC when I joined in the early 1970s. They make a strange couple: the honourable N MacLaurin, public school, MCC, and apparently "establishment" and Martin James wide-boy first class.
Martin was a truly magnificent club cricketer - the most
destructive opening bat I have ever seen. He could make strong men (and
very good players) weep trying to bowl at him. He twice scored 180 in one season and got vast numbers of runs besides. I wasn't present, but people who were still remember him thrashing David Surridge to all parts of the Bishop
Stortford ground. Stortford had been national club champions and Dave, at
that time, had only just finished his county career and was far too good
for many quite reasonable club players - he was quick and very accurate,
Martin, of course, marched down the wicket to him. When he saw him coming, Surridge bowled it very short and very quick. People who were there have the memory of our opening bat, half way down the track, rocking gently on to the back foot and hooking the ball out of the ground.
My own enduring image is of Herts v Gloucestershire in the Nat West at
Bristol. First over, Courtney Walsh runs up to bowl, Martin hits him
straight back over his head down the ground for 4. You could sort of tell
that Courtney wasn't very pleased.
About half a dozen or so years ago I opened the batting with Martin in an
end of the season club game. The first team captain and old git
combination. I remember snicking the ball for the two that bought up our
hundred partnerships for the first wicket - it also (just) got me into
double figures. Martin would shout at the opening bowler that he was
bowling too full at the same moment as he was lifting it over the sightscreen.
Martin captained the County in the last couple of years but did not have a
very good side and was somewhat past his best. He is still, however, a world champion sledger.
Since submitting these notes the Professor informs me that Martin scored a hundred for WGCCC in the opening game of this season.
Irritating Trends in Modern Cricket-Number 4
The commentators are responsible for an unnecessary and vulgar range of terminology that is unfortunately creeping into popular usage. Seam bowlers now jag the ball off the wicket. Why? What was wrong with the ball moving off the seam and being described as an off or leg cutter?
When one of the wielders of a 4-pound bat clubs it over the ropes the Ghastly Greig or Bob Willis will cry out “It’s a Maximum”. No its not, it’s a six and, moreover, what is a three with four overthrows - a super-maximum?
Do us all a favour and never repeat these awful terms and thereby help to keep them out of common usage.
Strange Elevens
Here is a real ragbag of individuals who make up this edition’s Jazz Hat eleven:
Bill Athey – Yorks & Gloucs
Sid Russell – Middlesex
Mike Smith – Warwicks
Peter May – Surrey
Brian Parsons - Surrey
Jason Gallian – Lancs & Notts
Ian Salisbury – Sussex & Surrey
Phil de Freitas – most counties
Mike Selvey – Surrey & Middlesex
Phil Tufnell – Middlesex
David Larter – Northants
What is the common denominator of this bunch? To save you asking, Sid can keep wicket.
Rangers Links
The Great Jack Morgan informs me that the Rangers midfield player, Richard Langley, who scored a hat trick at Blackpool, is not related to Jim “The Crab” Langley or to Arthur Longbottom who changed his name to Langley, by deed poll. However, he is none other than the son of Mike Langley, the South Hampstead wicket–keeper batsman of the seventies. This, of course, makes him the nephew of Big Alf, originally of South Hampstead, who captained the Bush at that time.
For the completists amongst you Richard’s full name is Richard Barrington Michael Langley. But if you are a completist I guess you knew that anyway.
Did you miss the earlier editions?
I will be please to email you a copy of the earlier editions of Googlies & Chinamen, if you missed them. You will be able to find out who George and the Professor are, who named him the Great Jack Morgan, all about Tour Madness, a detailed run down on the Duckworth Lewis method and other trivia that is essential to your understanding of the modern game. Just send me an email to secure your copies.
If you received this edition through a third party, please send me your email address to ensure that you get on the main mailing list for future editions.
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