G&C 276 12/25
GOOGLIES & CHINAMEN
An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 276
December 2025
Spot the Ball
Out and About with the Professor
The 10-hour (plus) time difference between here and Australia has always presented something of a challenge for those anxious to keep abreast of the latest Test match.
Googlies readers of, er, mature years, will recall lying in bed, with the covers tucked up under the chin, listening to Alston, Arlott, McGilvray, et al, with the sound crackling and whooshing – and occasionally disappearing entirely – trying to envisage the events on the field. When the sound disappeared, there was always the nervous wait to see if England had lost a wicket during the period of silence…they often had.
Now, of course, we have the vision and sound provided by TNT. Although even here there are some technical problems. It was almost the obverse of the 1950s and the radio, because the TNT commentators were able to tell us what was going to happen a second or so before it did. So, the commentator would say: “he’s snicked it and is caught” fractionally before the batter played the ball. This capacity for precognition would have been more impressive had not it been possible for almost anyone (at least in England’s second innings) to say “he’s snicked and is caught” at more or less any time, and have a fair chance of being right.
A considerable amount of writing – quite reasonably – has focussed on the middle order collapse to balls well wide of the off stump. Why did they just not leave them alone? Who knows. But there was a fairly healthy supply of brainless batting lower down the order as well. In both innings the tail decided that the large Perth arena provided the perfect opportunity to give catching practice to leg side boundary fielders…and they did it very well. Green, Smith and Labuschagne all happily obliged. The only exception was Wood, who tried to emulate his chums and slog it to leg but only succeeded in hitting it straight up in the air. Why do they do this? With three or four Australians on the leg-side boundary there are, blindingly obviously, lots of spaces for ones and twos. Why not do that?
The only (fractional) defence might be the state of the pitch. The Australian writer, Gideon Haigh, who describes himself (or is described by his publisher), with the effacement and self-deprecation for which Australians are so widely renown, as “the finest cricket writer alive”, said that there was: “nothing wrong with the pitch”.
An Ashes Test match finishes inside two days, and “there is nothing wrong with the pitch”.
19 wickets fell on Day One and 13 on Day Two and “there is nothing wrong with the pitch”.
Virtually every batter who was at the crease for any time on Day One got hit: on the gloves, on the body, on the elbow (two sickening blows), and in the face (two more), and “there was nothing wrong with the pitch”.
The whole game lasted 847 balls (the second fewest for any Test in Australia) and there was “nothing wrong with the pitch”.
A more considered and reflective view came from another Australian, Usman Khawaja, who said that the pitch: “Was a piece of shit”. He went on to point out that at the same venue last year against India, 17 wickets fell on Day One. Presumably, Khawaja is not overawed by the opinions of “the finest cricket writer in the world”, on the pitch, not least, one suspects, because he has actually had to bat on it. Now, it appears, he is in trouble with the authorities for disputing the magisterial opinion of Mr Haigh.
One can only conclude that tickets for the last couple of days at this venue, are always sold at a considerable discount, or perhaps you get a concessionary price for the next Aussie Rules match, for which the stadium was actually built.
One way or another, it did not make for happy viewing. I watched every ball bowled and went from smug satisfaction at lunch on the second day to enraged misery by the end of the game, not unlike, I suppose, the feelings, all those years’ ago, listening to McGilvray telling us that England had failed again.
Why does anyone bother to go and watch? I have no idea… I fly to Australia next week.
This & That
During one of the Australia v India T20 matches Mitchell Marsh hooked Rana for six and the technology calculated that the distance was 124 metres. This prompted the commentators to note that recently Tim David had had a six measured at 129 metres. These are enormous distances. When KP introduced regular six hitting into the test arena the strike would generally just clear the ropes and would be considered a big hit at an estimated 70 yards. I have previously reported that the longest hit I have witnessed was Owais Shah’s hit at Colwyn Bay which cleared the pavilion, the car park behind and landed in the tennis courts. Big as it seemed I doubt whether it was more than a hundred yards. And, of course, these old distances are yards and to compare to metres are 10% shorter!
The Abu Dahbi T10 has received very little publicity but I did catch these notes on Finals Day. Australia's Tim David scored 98 from 30 balls as UAE Bulls won their first Abu Dhabi T10 League title with an 80-run win over Aspin Stallions. He had hit 57 off 18 balls earlier in the day to lead Bulls to the final, but this was even better. He hit three fours and 12 sixes as he shared an unbroken 128-run stand with Rovman Powell to power Bulls to 150-1. David finishes the tournament as the leading run-scorer (393), with Phil Salt second on 256. Australia's Andrew Tye was the leading wicket-taker with 13.
Last month I noted the batting qualities of the South African tail. In the second test against India they again demonstrated their substantial qualities. After being 246 for 6 they were finally all out for 489. Muthusamy made 109 and Marco Jansen scored 93. This formed the basis for their record victory over India. South Africa won by 408 runs in the second test to claim just their second series win in India, and their first since 2000 under Hansie Cronje. The defeat surpasses India's previous heaviest loss, which was by 342 runs against Australia in Nagpur in 2004. Aiden Markram took a record nine catches.
Gobbledegook. The Birmingham Bears will be renamed the Warwickshire Bears in the T20 Blast from next season. The county dropped Warwickshire from its name in the T20 format in 2014, but have decided to bring it back to "unite" the men's and women's teams.
Rohit Sharma broke the record for the most sixes hit in men's one-day internationals as India edged South Africa by 17 runs in the opening game of their series in Ranchi. After being asked to bat, India posted 349-8 with Virat Kohli hitting a record-extending 52nd ODI century. He shared 136 with Rohit, who made 57 off 51 balls, for the second wicket. Rohit, who already held the record for the most sixes across formats in international cricket (now 642), hit three sixes to overtake Shahid Afridi's 15-year record of 351 ODI maximums.
The Liverpool faithful fans turn out not to be so “faithful” after all. The stands had substantially emptied by the end of their 3-0 thrashing by Notts Forest. The travelling Spurs fans to the Emirates had all left their corner long before the end of the North London derby.
Thompson Matters
Steve has been mixing in illustrious company
I had never been to the Conservative Club in Leominster, an historic market town in North Herefordshire; indeed, I had never been to a Conservative Club anywhere. Leominster (pronounced ‘Lem-ster’; one of the top twenty mispronounced place names in the UK) is a small town of contrasts. It has a preponderance of antique shops and Grade II listed buildings but a reputation for its above average crime rate; indeed the highest in the county with robbery, violence and sexual offences being the most common.
It was, therefore, an interesting destination for the evening given our guest. We were due to pick up David Ivon Gower at 6.15pm from the salubrious Castle House Hotel in Hereford. I say ‘we’, Jon was driving and Bob, Huw and I were in the back seats of Jon’s very comfortable Land Rover. As we arrived Jon’s phone rang. I’d better take this boys as it’s Rick (name changed) and when the guy responsible for security at the SAS camp calls, you pick up.’ Rick was involved in the organisation of the evening and wanted to check we were on schedule. Thankfully we were.
When our guest of honour took his seat in the front he looked round to see three shadowy figures and immediately said, ‘Is this a kidnap?’ To which Bob replied, ‘Well we are taking you to Leominster.’
We hadn’t driven two hundred yards before a police car complete with blues and twos whizzed past. ‘It IS a kidnap!’ exclaimed our guest.
Leominster by night is marginally more appealing than Leominster by day and as if to welcome cricketing royalty the Con Club entrance had been freshly painted, the smell of the newly applied white gloss filling the porch as we entered. Into the green room and, as befits a wine connoisseur who had regaled us on the journey up of visits with Botham to Arlott’s cellar, there was a good bottle of red to be opened. This was courtesy of Jon who having sampled the SAS red normally on offer on these occasions thought it could be bettered. Fortunately Rick was none the wiser!
The audience of one hundred and fifty then settled down to two back to back forty-five minute Q and As excellently chaired by cricket writer Peter Hayter, son of Reg, who lives locally. Despite having told the stories countless times Gower managed to make them all sound fresh and full of laid back humour.
Who was the best bowler he faced? Marshall. Not the quickest but without a doubt the best, followed by, ‘Why do you think I joined f***ing Hampshire!’ How Jonathan Agnew, a reformed chain-smoker, lapsed, when, pads on, he was one drop away from facing Sylvester Clarke at the The Oval.
Inevitably the Tiger Moth flight was recalled. In so doing he referred to the post-flight posed photographs which only served to, ‘make matters worse’. He name checked Graham Morris the photographer. In the Green Room during the break I told him that Graham had been in my Enfield Grammar School cricket teams in the early eighties. ‘I ended up being his best man in the Caribbean.’ came the reply. In cricket it seems, everyone is just one contact away.
His laconic style and dry humour make him an excellent guest and his recollection of the post-flight dressing down and subsequent £1000 fine were particularly amusing. To paraphrase: ‘I walked into the room to see Tour Manager Graham Lush, Coach Mickey Stuart and Captain Graham Gooch all looking stern. The fourth member of the Disciplinary Committee was Vice-Captain Alan Lamb - who was pissing himself. In the vast bar area there was just one tall bar stool bang in the middle, I knew instinctively that was mine.’
A good night was had by all and as we walked back to Jon’s Range Rover which thankfully still possessed all four wheels our guest reflected that he had enjoyed the evening as much as we all had.
Back at the Castle House in Hereford three weeks later and a chance to meet Roland Butcher again after a fifty year gap. He recalled an MCC Young Pros and Middlesex Young Cricketers match at Lord’s and his season playing for Enfield, his hundred at South Hampstead in1974 (Gomes also 50-odd) but not that we’d won by six wickets!
Being from the same era and with the majority of the chat about his time as an MCC Young Professional and his career at Middlesex it was a lovely series of blasts from the past.
During Q and As he was effusive about Brearley’s and Gatting’s very different but equally inspirational captaincy. With their combined period of leadership being twenty-six years he reflected that in the twenty-six years that followed there have been seventeen captains of Middlesex and that the relative absence of silverware was arguably self-explanatory.
The matter of injury breakdown, particularly of fast bowlers, has featured regularly in Googlies over the years and Roland talked about this in great depth. He described how the West Indies team who contested Packer’s World Series in 1977 were full of talent but not particularly fit. At the time the English and Australian teams were already benefitting from formal fitness regimes. Enter Dennis Waite who came from a rugby and Aussie Rules background and completely redefined what it was to be ‘fit to bowl’. The successive batteries of Caribbean quicks that dominated Test cricket for the following three decades were the result of great skill but equally great fitness.
When asked whether West Indies cricket will ever return to anything like such levels, he was doubtful. He spoke with authority; he was a West Indies Test selector with Desmond Haynes as recently as 2023. Relative to other Test nations there was now less money available and the absence of top flight fitness professionals was one consequence. He reflected on the fact that now Indian fast bowlers were fitter and faster than West Indian bowlers. Fitness and conditioning are king.
This came with a caveat. When the fitness and conditioning technicians gain too much control of who should play and how much they should bowl in nets, let alone matches, you end up with a group of quicks who are gym fit but not match fit.
All this within hours of Crawley’s five-ball duck. Roland was critical of the preparation and reflected with foresight that if things went wrong with the batting the next cab off the block, is a makeshift opener who has barely any red ball experience. At the time of writing, selection history under this regime suggests it is unlikely Crawley will be dropped for Bethell and even if he is it looks unlikely it will be based on any match form Bethell will have demonstrated, whatever colour the ball.
Two excellent evenings in the company of two English cricketers from another era. When David Gower was asked whether he considered his being let go by Sky was an ‘ageist act’, he was creditably diplomatic. There will be some who will say that the game has moved on and that coverage and punditry requires a younger perspective, and of course it has and perhaps it does. I wonder, however, whether in four Tests’ time there will be some of a certain age who will say, ‘I told you so.’
Crocks Corner
In this era when bowlers have to carry out inappropriate fitness regimes and then spend more time on the treatment bench than actually bowling this feature celebrates the manifold complaints of these elite athletes. Feel free to submit anything you notice
“England have an injury concern over fast bowler Mark Wood after he suffered tightness in his left hamstring on the first day of the Ashes warm-up match against England Lions. Wood, playing for the first time since suffering a knee injury in February, left the field midway through the second session at Lilac Hill in Perth. The 35-year-old will have a scan on Friday. England hope he will be able to bowl on Saturday's third and final day. Wood bowled eight overs in two spells of four, which England said was a pre-planned workload. Wood has not played a Test since August 2024, when he was ruled out of the rest of that year because of an elbow injury. He returned in white-ball cricket at the beginning of this year but sustained a knee injury at the Champions Trophy which subsequently required surgery. The hamstring problem is in the same leg on which Wood had the knee operation. The tour match against the Lions was Wood's first cricket of any kind in nine months and his first in whites for 15 months.”
“Mark Wood looks set to miss the second Ashes Test after sitting out England's first training session in Brisbane. The Durham pace bowler remained at the team hotel to rest an issue with his left knee while the remainder of the side returned to work with an optional session at Allan Border Field.”
“Rehan Ahmed's Lions tour curtailed by injury. The leg-spinner picked up a "right lower leg" strain after making 16 for England Lions against England in the Ashes warmup game at Lilac Hill.”
“England’s back-up bowling stocks have been hit by the news that Sonny Baker will play no further part on the tour of Australia. Hampshire’s Baker is with the England Lions but appears set to return to the UK after experiencing soreness in his shin. It is the second blow to the Lions in the past few hours, after Surrey’s Tom Lawes also departed to an ankle injury, reducing the squad to 15 players.”
Meanwhile, Cole Palmer, who has missed most of the season already, broke a toe in a domestic incident. This brings him into the exalted company of Glen Maxwell and Jonny Bairstow.
Barnet Matters
Pep City’s Rayan Cherki has a throwback hairstyle. He has a severe parting and heavily elaborated brylcreamed waves. He could easily pass for a spiv partner of Terry Thomas in a fifties B-movie.
County Stuff
The BBC website tells us the following county personnel changes:
Derbyshire
2025 overseas players: Caleb Jewell (Australia), Blair Tickner (New Zealand), Allah Mohammad Ghazanfar (Afghanistan)
Overseas players: Caleb Jewell (Australia)
In: Matt Montgomery (Nottinghamshire)
Out: David Lloyd (RET), Alex Thomson (REL)
Durham
2025 overseas players: David Bedingham (South Africa), Brendan Doggett (Australia), Zak Foulkes (New Zealand), Neil Wagner (New Zealand), Codi Yusuf (South Africa), Jimmy Neesham (New Zealand), Shafiqullah Ghafari (Afghanistan)
In: Kasey Aldridge (Somerset), Archie Bailey (Gloucestershire)
Out: Mitchell Killeen (Essex), Paul Coughlin (Lancashire)
Essex
2025 overseas players: Simon Harmer (South Africa), Kasun Rajitha (Sri Lanka), Mohammad Amir (Pakistan), Khaleel Ahmed (India), Curtis Campher (Ireland), Doug Bracewell (New Zealand)
In: Zaman Akhter (Gloucestershire), Mitchell Killeen (Durham)
Out: Nick Browne (RET), Jamal Richards (REL), Adam Rossington (REL)
Glamorgan
2025 overseas players: Colin Ingram (South Africa), Asitha Fernando (Sri Lanka), Marnus Labuschagne (Australia), Hayden Kerr (Australia), Matt Kuhnemann (Australia), Imad Wasim (Pakistan)
In: Sean Dickson (Somerset)
Out: Sam Northeast (Kent), Tom Bevan (REL)
Gloucestershire
2025 overseas players: Cameron Bancroft (Australia), Cameron Green (Australia), D'Arcy Short (Australia), Todd Murphy (Australia)
Overseas players: Cameron Bancroft (Australia), D'Arcy Short (Australia, for T20)
In: Craig Miles (Warwickshire), Will Williams (Lancashire), Dawid Malan (Yorkshire, for T20)
Out: Archie Bailey (Durham), Ajeet Singh Dale (Lancashire), Dom Goodman (Sussex), Zaman Akhter (Essex), Tom Price (Sussex), Josh Shaw (Somerset)
Other news: Former England women's coach Jon Lewis has joined the club as director of cricket, while Tom Smith has taken a coaching position after retiring in July 2025. Seamer Marchant de Lange has signed a new contract just for T20 cricket.
Hampshire
2025 overseas players: Kyle Abbott (South Africa), Lhuan-dre Pretorius (South Africa), Dewald Brevis (South Africa), Brett Hampton (Australia), Bjorn Fortuin (South Africa), Tilak Varma (India), Chris Lynn (Australia), Hilton Cartwright (Australia), Washington Sundar (India)
Overseas players: Kyle Abbott (South Africa)
In: None
Out: Keith Barker (Warwickshire), Joseph Eckland, external (REL), Benny Howell (Nottinghamshire)
Other news: Head coach Adrian Birrell has stepped down.
Kent
2025 overseas players: Wes Agar (Australia), Tom Rogers (Australia), Kashif Ali (Pakistan), Keith Dudgeon (South Africa)
Overseas players: Keith Dudgeon (South Africa)
In: Matt Milnes (Yorkshire), Sam Northeast (Glamorgan)
Out: Nathan Gilchrist (Warwickshire), George Garrett (RET), Marcus O'Riordan (REL), Mohammed Rizvi (REL), Jack Leaning (Sussex)
Other news: Kent have appointed Jaahid Ali and Sam Faulkner as assistant coaches for bowling and batting respectively, while former Kent all-rounder Darren Stevens returns as bowling consultant.
Lancashire
2025 overseas players: Chris Green (Australia), Anderson Phillip (West Indies, until the end of July), Marcus Harris (Australia, for Championship and One-Day Cup), Ashton Turner (Australia, for T20, 29 May-4 July)
Overseas players: Marcus Harris (Australia)
In: Ajeet Singh Dale (Gloucestershire), Paul Coughlin (Durham)
Out: Will Williams (Gloucestershire), Josh Boyden, external (REL)
Other news: Lancashire have appointed interim head coach Steven Croft on a full time basis, while bowling coach Craig White has left the club. Danny Salpietro has been named second XI coach, external, with predecessor Karl Krikken becoming talent identification manager. Luke Wood has signed a new white-ball only contract.
Leicestershire
2025 overseas players: Peter Handscomb (Australia), Logan van Beek (Netherlands), Shan Masood (Pakistan)
Overseas players: Peter Handscomb (Australia), Keshav Maharaj (South Africa, for first four months of season)
In: Ben Green (Somerset), Stephen Ezkinazi (Middlesex), Jonny Tattersall (Yorkshire), Josh Davey (Somerset)
Out: Chris Wright (RET), Louis Kimber (Northamptonshire), Matt Salisbury (REL), Roman Walker (REL)
Middlesex
2025 overseas players: Kane Williamson (New Zealand), Josh Little (Ireland), Dane Paterson (South Africa)
In: Caleb Falconer, external (YTH)
Out: Stephen Ezkinazi (Leicestershire)
Northamptonshire
2025 overseas players: Matt Breetzke (South Africa), Yuzvendra Chahal (India), Harry Conway (Australia), Lloyd Pope (Australia), Tim Robinson (New Zealand)
Overseas players: Matt Breetzke (South Africa), Yuzvendra Chahal (India, second half of the season, for Championship and One-Day Cup), Harry Conway (Australia, for first two months of the season), Nathan McSweeney (Australia)
In: Louis Kimber (Leicestershire), Calvin Harrison (Nottinghamshire)
Out: Freddie Heldreich (REL)
Nottinghamshire
2025 overseas players: Kyle Verreynne (South Africa), Fergus O'Neill (Australia), Daniel Sams (Australia), Mohammad Abbas (Pakistan), Moises Henriques (Australia), Ishan Kishan (India)
Overseas players: Kyle Verreynne (South Africa, for Championship), Fergus O'Neill (Australia, from April-June)
In: Benny Howell (Hampshire, for T20)
Out: Matt Montgomery (Derbyshire), Sammy King, external (REL), Dane Schadendorf, external (REL), Calvin Harrison (Northamptonshire)
Somerset
2025 overseas players: Riley Meredith (Australia), Matt Henry (New Zealand), Migael Pretorius (South Africa)
Overseas players: Migael Pretorius (South Africa), Riley Meredith (Australia, for T20 Blast)
In: Josh Shaw (Gloucestershire)
Out: Kasey Aldridge (Durham), Sean Dickson (Glamorgan), Josh Davey (Leicestershire), Ben Green (Leicestershire), Andy Umeed, external (REL)
Surrey
2025 overseas players: Nathan Smith (New Zealand), Mitchell Santner (New Zealand), Kemar Roach (West Indies), Kurtis Patterson (Australia), Adam Zampa (Australia), Sai Kishore (India), Rahul Chahar (India)
In: None
Out: None
Sussex
2025 overseas players: Daniel Hughes (Australia), Jayden Seales (West Indies), Nathan McAndrew (Australia), Jaydev Unadkat (India), Gurinder Sandhu (Australia)
Overseas players: Jaydev Unadkat, external (India, for last eight Championship matches)
In: Danny Briggs (Warwickshire), Dom Goodman (Gloucestershire), Tom Price (Gloucestershire), Jack Leaning (Kent)
Out: Bertie Foreman, external (REL), Ari Karvelas, external (REL), Archie Lenham, external (REL), Zach Lion-Cachet, external (REL), Henry Rogers, external (REL)
Other news: Briggs has re-joined in a player-coach capacity.
Warwickshire
2025 overseas players: Tom Latham (New Zealand), Beau Webster (Australia), Hasan Ali (Pakistan), Vishwa Fernando (Sri Lanka), Corey Rocchiccioli (Australia), Will Young (New Zealand)
Overseas players: Beau Webster (Australia, for first half of season)
In: Jordan Thompson (Yorkshire), Nathan Gilchrist (Kent), Keith Barker (Hampshire)
Out: Moeen Ali (RET from county cricket), Danny Briggs (Sussex), Craig Miles (Gloucestershire)
Other news: Graeme Welch has re-joined the club to replace Stuart Barnes as bowling coach.
Worcestershire
2025 overseas players: Jacob Duffy (New Zealand), Ben Dwarshuis (Australia), Henry Nicholls (New Zealand), Khurram Shahzad (Pakistan)
Overseas players: Usama Mir (Pakistan), Ben Dwarshuis (Australia, for T20)
In: None
Out: Tom Hinley (REL), Yadvinder Singh (REL)
Other news: Former Worcestershire batter Alexei Kervezee has rejoined the club, external as second XI and assistant coach.
Yorkshire
2025 overseas players: Will Sutherland (Australia), Will O'Rourke (New Zealand), Jordan Buckingham (Australia), Ben Sears (New Zealand), Abdullah Shafique (Pakistan), Imam Ul-Haq (Pakistan), Mayank Agarwal (India)
In: None
Out: Jonny Tattersall (Leicestershire), Jordan Thompson (Warwickshire), Matt Milnes (Kent), Dawid Malan (Gloucestershire)
Googlies Website
All the back editions of Googlies can be found on the G&C website. There are also many photographs most of which have never appeared in Googlies.
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An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 276
December 2025
Spot the Ball
Out and About with the Professor
The 10-hour (plus) time difference between here and Australia has always presented something of a challenge for those anxious to keep abreast of the latest Test match.
Googlies readers of, er, mature years, will recall lying in bed, with the covers tucked up under the chin, listening to Alston, Arlott, McGilvray, et al, with the sound crackling and whooshing – and occasionally disappearing entirely – trying to envisage the events on the field. When the sound disappeared, there was always the nervous wait to see if England had lost a wicket during the period of silence…they often had.
Now, of course, we have the vision and sound provided by TNT. Although even here there are some technical problems. It was almost the obverse of the 1950s and the radio, because the TNT commentators were able to tell us what was going to happen a second or so before it did. So, the commentator would say: “he’s snicked it and is caught” fractionally before the batter played the ball. This capacity for precognition would have been more impressive had not it been possible for almost anyone (at least in England’s second innings) to say “he’s snicked and is caught” at more or less any time, and have a fair chance of being right.
A considerable amount of writing – quite reasonably – has focussed on the middle order collapse to balls well wide of the off stump. Why did they just not leave them alone? Who knows. But there was a fairly healthy supply of brainless batting lower down the order as well. In both innings the tail decided that the large Perth arena provided the perfect opportunity to give catching practice to leg side boundary fielders…and they did it very well. Green, Smith and Labuschagne all happily obliged. The only exception was Wood, who tried to emulate his chums and slog it to leg but only succeeded in hitting it straight up in the air. Why do they do this? With three or four Australians on the leg-side boundary there are, blindingly obviously, lots of spaces for ones and twos. Why not do that?
The only (fractional) defence might be the state of the pitch. The Australian writer, Gideon Haigh, who describes himself (or is described by his publisher), with the effacement and self-deprecation for which Australians are so widely renown, as “the finest cricket writer alive”, said that there was: “nothing wrong with the pitch”.
An Ashes Test match finishes inside two days, and “there is nothing wrong with the pitch”.
19 wickets fell on Day One and 13 on Day Two and “there is nothing wrong with the pitch”.
Virtually every batter who was at the crease for any time on Day One got hit: on the gloves, on the body, on the elbow (two sickening blows), and in the face (two more), and “there was nothing wrong with the pitch”.
The whole game lasted 847 balls (the second fewest for any Test in Australia) and there was “nothing wrong with the pitch”.
A more considered and reflective view came from another Australian, Usman Khawaja, who said that the pitch: “Was a piece of shit”. He went on to point out that at the same venue last year against India, 17 wickets fell on Day One. Presumably, Khawaja is not overawed by the opinions of “the finest cricket writer in the world”, on the pitch, not least, one suspects, because he has actually had to bat on it. Now, it appears, he is in trouble with the authorities for disputing the magisterial opinion of Mr Haigh.
One can only conclude that tickets for the last couple of days at this venue, are always sold at a considerable discount, or perhaps you get a concessionary price for the next Aussie Rules match, for which the stadium was actually built.
One way or another, it did not make for happy viewing. I watched every ball bowled and went from smug satisfaction at lunch on the second day to enraged misery by the end of the game, not unlike, I suppose, the feelings, all those years’ ago, listening to McGilvray telling us that England had failed again.
Why does anyone bother to go and watch? I have no idea… I fly to Australia next week.
This & That
During one of the Australia v India T20 matches Mitchell Marsh hooked Rana for six and the technology calculated that the distance was 124 metres. This prompted the commentators to note that recently Tim David had had a six measured at 129 metres. These are enormous distances. When KP introduced regular six hitting into the test arena the strike would generally just clear the ropes and would be considered a big hit at an estimated 70 yards. I have previously reported that the longest hit I have witnessed was Owais Shah’s hit at Colwyn Bay which cleared the pavilion, the car park behind and landed in the tennis courts. Big as it seemed I doubt whether it was more than a hundred yards. And, of course, these old distances are yards and to compare to metres are 10% shorter!
The Abu Dahbi T10 has received very little publicity but I did catch these notes on Finals Day. Australia's Tim David scored 98 from 30 balls as UAE Bulls won their first Abu Dhabi T10 League title with an 80-run win over Aspin Stallions. He had hit 57 off 18 balls earlier in the day to lead Bulls to the final, but this was even better. He hit three fours and 12 sixes as he shared an unbroken 128-run stand with Rovman Powell to power Bulls to 150-1. David finishes the tournament as the leading run-scorer (393), with Phil Salt second on 256. Australia's Andrew Tye was the leading wicket-taker with 13.
Last month I noted the batting qualities of the South African tail. In the second test against India they again demonstrated their substantial qualities. After being 246 for 6 they were finally all out for 489. Muthusamy made 109 and Marco Jansen scored 93. This formed the basis for their record victory over India. South Africa won by 408 runs in the second test to claim just their second series win in India, and their first since 2000 under Hansie Cronje. The defeat surpasses India's previous heaviest loss, which was by 342 runs against Australia in Nagpur in 2004. Aiden Markram took a record nine catches.
Gobbledegook. The Birmingham Bears will be renamed the Warwickshire Bears in the T20 Blast from next season. The county dropped Warwickshire from its name in the T20 format in 2014, but have decided to bring it back to "unite" the men's and women's teams.
Rohit Sharma broke the record for the most sixes hit in men's one-day internationals as India edged South Africa by 17 runs in the opening game of their series in Ranchi. After being asked to bat, India posted 349-8 with Virat Kohli hitting a record-extending 52nd ODI century. He shared 136 with Rohit, who made 57 off 51 balls, for the second wicket. Rohit, who already held the record for the most sixes across formats in international cricket (now 642), hit three sixes to overtake Shahid Afridi's 15-year record of 351 ODI maximums.
The Liverpool faithful fans turn out not to be so “faithful” after all. The stands had substantially emptied by the end of their 3-0 thrashing by Notts Forest. The travelling Spurs fans to the Emirates had all left their corner long before the end of the North London derby.
Thompson Matters
Steve has been mixing in illustrious company
I had never been to the Conservative Club in Leominster, an historic market town in North Herefordshire; indeed, I had never been to a Conservative Club anywhere. Leominster (pronounced ‘Lem-ster’; one of the top twenty mispronounced place names in the UK) is a small town of contrasts. It has a preponderance of antique shops and Grade II listed buildings but a reputation for its above average crime rate; indeed the highest in the county with robbery, violence and sexual offences being the most common.
It was, therefore, an interesting destination for the evening given our guest. We were due to pick up David Ivon Gower at 6.15pm from the salubrious Castle House Hotel in Hereford. I say ‘we’, Jon was driving and Bob, Huw and I were in the back seats of Jon’s very comfortable Land Rover. As we arrived Jon’s phone rang. I’d better take this boys as it’s Rick (name changed) and when the guy responsible for security at the SAS camp calls, you pick up.’ Rick was involved in the organisation of the evening and wanted to check we were on schedule. Thankfully we were.
When our guest of honour took his seat in the front he looked round to see three shadowy figures and immediately said, ‘Is this a kidnap?’ To which Bob replied, ‘Well we are taking you to Leominster.’
We hadn’t driven two hundred yards before a police car complete with blues and twos whizzed past. ‘It IS a kidnap!’ exclaimed our guest.
Leominster by night is marginally more appealing than Leominster by day and as if to welcome cricketing royalty the Con Club entrance had been freshly painted, the smell of the newly applied white gloss filling the porch as we entered. Into the green room and, as befits a wine connoisseur who had regaled us on the journey up of visits with Botham to Arlott’s cellar, there was a good bottle of red to be opened. This was courtesy of Jon who having sampled the SAS red normally on offer on these occasions thought it could be bettered. Fortunately Rick was none the wiser!
The audience of one hundred and fifty then settled down to two back to back forty-five minute Q and As excellently chaired by cricket writer Peter Hayter, son of Reg, who lives locally. Despite having told the stories countless times Gower managed to make them all sound fresh and full of laid back humour.
Who was the best bowler he faced? Marshall. Not the quickest but without a doubt the best, followed by, ‘Why do you think I joined f***ing Hampshire!’ How Jonathan Agnew, a reformed chain-smoker, lapsed, when, pads on, he was one drop away from facing Sylvester Clarke at the The Oval.
Inevitably the Tiger Moth flight was recalled. In so doing he referred to the post-flight posed photographs which only served to, ‘make matters worse’. He name checked Graham Morris the photographer. In the Green Room during the break I told him that Graham had been in my Enfield Grammar School cricket teams in the early eighties. ‘I ended up being his best man in the Caribbean.’ came the reply. In cricket it seems, everyone is just one contact away.
His laconic style and dry humour make him an excellent guest and his recollection of the post-flight dressing down and subsequent £1000 fine were particularly amusing. To paraphrase: ‘I walked into the room to see Tour Manager Graham Lush, Coach Mickey Stuart and Captain Graham Gooch all looking stern. The fourth member of the Disciplinary Committee was Vice-Captain Alan Lamb - who was pissing himself. In the vast bar area there was just one tall bar stool bang in the middle, I knew instinctively that was mine.’
A good night was had by all and as we walked back to Jon’s Range Rover which thankfully still possessed all four wheels our guest reflected that he had enjoyed the evening as much as we all had.
Back at the Castle House in Hereford three weeks later and a chance to meet Roland Butcher again after a fifty year gap. He recalled an MCC Young Pros and Middlesex Young Cricketers match at Lord’s and his season playing for Enfield, his hundred at South Hampstead in1974 (Gomes also 50-odd) but not that we’d won by six wickets!
Being from the same era and with the majority of the chat about his time as an MCC Young Professional and his career at Middlesex it was a lovely series of blasts from the past.
During Q and As he was effusive about Brearley’s and Gatting’s very different but equally inspirational captaincy. With their combined period of leadership being twenty-six years he reflected that in the twenty-six years that followed there have been seventeen captains of Middlesex and that the relative absence of silverware was arguably self-explanatory.
The matter of injury breakdown, particularly of fast bowlers, has featured regularly in Googlies over the years and Roland talked about this in great depth. He described how the West Indies team who contested Packer’s World Series in 1977 were full of talent but not particularly fit. At the time the English and Australian teams were already benefitting from formal fitness regimes. Enter Dennis Waite who came from a rugby and Aussie Rules background and completely redefined what it was to be ‘fit to bowl’. The successive batteries of Caribbean quicks that dominated Test cricket for the following three decades were the result of great skill but equally great fitness.
When asked whether West Indies cricket will ever return to anything like such levels, he was doubtful. He spoke with authority; he was a West Indies Test selector with Desmond Haynes as recently as 2023. Relative to other Test nations there was now less money available and the absence of top flight fitness professionals was one consequence. He reflected on the fact that now Indian fast bowlers were fitter and faster than West Indian bowlers. Fitness and conditioning are king.
This came with a caveat. When the fitness and conditioning technicians gain too much control of who should play and how much they should bowl in nets, let alone matches, you end up with a group of quicks who are gym fit but not match fit.
All this within hours of Crawley’s five-ball duck. Roland was critical of the preparation and reflected with foresight that if things went wrong with the batting the next cab off the block, is a makeshift opener who has barely any red ball experience. At the time of writing, selection history under this regime suggests it is unlikely Crawley will be dropped for Bethell and even if he is it looks unlikely it will be based on any match form Bethell will have demonstrated, whatever colour the ball.
Two excellent evenings in the company of two English cricketers from another era. When David Gower was asked whether he considered his being let go by Sky was an ‘ageist act’, he was creditably diplomatic. There will be some who will say that the game has moved on and that coverage and punditry requires a younger perspective, and of course it has and perhaps it does. I wonder, however, whether in four Tests’ time there will be some of a certain age who will say, ‘I told you so.’
Crocks Corner
In this era when bowlers have to carry out inappropriate fitness regimes and then spend more time on the treatment bench than actually bowling this feature celebrates the manifold complaints of these elite athletes. Feel free to submit anything you notice
“England have an injury concern over fast bowler Mark Wood after he suffered tightness in his left hamstring on the first day of the Ashes warm-up match against England Lions. Wood, playing for the first time since suffering a knee injury in February, left the field midway through the second session at Lilac Hill in Perth. The 35-year-old will have a scan on Friday. England hope he will be able to bowl on Saturday's third and final day. Wood bowled eight overs in two spells of four, which England said was a pre-planned workload. Wood has not played a Test since August 2024, when he was ruled out of the rest of that year because of an elbow injury. He returned in white-ball cricket at the beginning of this year but sustained a knee injury at the Champions Trophy which subsequently required surgery. The hamstring problem is in the same leg on which Wood had the knee operation. The tour match against the Lions was Wood's first cricket of any kind in nine months and his first in whites for 15 months.”
“Mark Wood looks set to miss the second Ashes Test after sitting out England's first training session in Brisbane. The Durham pace bowler remained at the team hotel to rest an issue with his left knee while the remainder of the side returned to work with an optional session at Allan Border Field.”
“Rehan Ahmed's Lions tour curtailed by injury. The leg-spinner picked up a "right lower leg" strain after making 16 for England Lions against England in the Ashes warmup game at Lilac Hill.”
“England’s back-up bowling stocks have been hit by the news that Sonny Baker will play no further part on the tour of Australia. Hampshire’s Baker is with the England Lions but appears set to return to the UK after experiencing soreness in his shin. It is the second blow to the Lions in the past few hours, after Surrey’s Tom Lawes also departed to an ankle injury, reducing the squad to 15 players.”
Meanwhile, Cole Palmer, who has missed most of the season already, broke a toe in a domestic incident. This brings him into the exalted company of Glen Maxwell and Jonny Bairstow.
Barnet Matters
Pep City’s Rayan Cherki has a throwback hairstyle. He has a severe parting and heavily elaborated brylcreamed waves. He could easily pass for a spiv partner of Terry Thomas in a fifties B-movie.
County Stuff
The BBC website tells us the following county personnel changes:
Derbyshire
2025 overseas players: Caleb Jewell (Australia), Blair Tickner (New Zealand), Allah Mohammad Ghazanfar (Afghanistan)
Overseas players: Caleb Jewell (Australia)
In: Matt Montgomery (Nottinghamshire)
Out: David Lloyd (RET), Alex Thomson (REL)
Durham
2025 overseas players: David Bedingham (South Africa), Brendan Doggett (Australia), Zak Foulkes (New Zealand), Neil Wagner (New Zealand), Codi Yusuf (South Africa), Jimmy Neesham (New Zealand), Shafiqullah Ghafari (Afghanistan)
In: Kasey Aldridge (Somerset), Archie Bailey (Gloucestershire)
Out: Mitchell Killeen (Essex), Paul Coughlin (Lancashire)
Essex
2025 overseas players: Simon Harmer (South Africa), Kasun Rajitha (Sri Lanka), Mohammad Amir (Pakistan), Khaleel Ahmed (India), Curtis Campher (Ireland), Doug Bracewell (New Zealand)
In: Zaman Akhter (Gloucestershire), Mitchell Killeen (Durham)
Out: Nick Browne (RET), Jamal Richards (REL), Adam Rossington (REL)
Glamorgan
2025 overseas players: Colin Ingram (South Africa), Asitha Fernando (Sri Lanka), Marnus Labuschagne (Australia), Hayden Kerr (Australia), Matt Kuhnemann (Australia), Imad Wasim (Pakistan)
In: Sean Dickson (Somerset)
Out: Sam Northeast (Kent), Tom Bevan (REL)
Gloucestershire
2025 overseas players: Cameron Bancroft (Australia), Cameron Green (Australia), D'Arcy Short (Australia), Todd Murphy (Australia)
Overseas players: Cameron Bancroft (Australia), D'Arcy Short (Australia, for T20)
In: Craig Miles (Warwickshire), Will Williams (Lancashire), Dawid Malan (Yorkshire, for T20)
Out: Archie Bailey (Durham), Ajeet Singh Dale (Lancashire), Dom Goodman (Sussex), Zaman Akhter (Essex), Tom Price (Sussex), Josh Shaw (Somerset)
Other news: Former England women's coach Jon Lewis has joined the club as director of cricket, while Tom Smith has taken a coaching position after retiring in July 2025. Seamer Marchant de Lange has signed a new contract just for T20 cricket.
Hampshire
2025 overseas players: Kyle Abbott (South Africa), Lhuan-dre Pretorius (South Africa), Dewald Brevis (South Africa), Brett Hampton (Australia), Bjorn Fortuin (South Africa), Tilak Varma (India), Chris Lynn (Australia), Hilton Cartwright (Australia), Washington Sundar (India)
Overseas players: Kyle Abbott (South Africa)
In: None
Out: Keith Barker (Warwickshire), Joseph Eckland, external (REL), Benny Howell (Nottinghamshire)
Other news: Head coach Adrian Birrell has stepped down.
Kent
2025 overseas players: Wes Agar (Australia), Tom Rogers (Australia), Kashif Ali (Pakistan), Keith Dudgeon (South Africa)
Overseas players: Keith Dudgeon (South Africa)
In: Matt Milnes (Yorkshire), Sam Northeast (Glamorgan)
Out: Nathan Gilchrist (Warwickshire), George Garrett (RET), Marcus O'Riordan (REL), Mohammed Rizvi (REL), Jack Leaning (Sussex)
Other news: Kent have appointed Jaahid Ali and Sam Faulkner as assistant coaches for bowling and batting respectively, while former Kent all-rounder Darren Stevens returns as bowling consultant.
Lancashire
2025 overseas players: Chris Green (Australia), Anderson Phillip (West Indies, until the end of July), Marcus Harris (Australia, for Championship and One-Day Cup), Ashton Turner (Australia, for T20, 29 May-4 July)
Overseas players: Marcus Harris (Australia)
In: Ajeet Singh Dale (Gloucestershire), Paul Coughlin (Durham)
Out: Will Williams (Gloucestershire), Josh Boyden, external (REL)
Other news: Lancashire have appointed interim head coach Steven Croft on a full time basis, while bowling coach Craig White has left the club. Danny Salpietro has been named second XI coach, external, with predecessor Karl Krikken becoming talent identification manager. Luke Wood has signed a new white-ball only contract.
Leicestershire
2025 overseas players: Peter Handscomb (Australia), Logan van Beek (Netherlands), Shan Masood (Pakistan)
Overseas players: Peter Handscomb (Australia), Keshav Maharaj (South Africa, for first four months of season)
In: Ben Green (Somerset), Stephen Ezkinazi (Middlesex), Jonny Tattersall (Yorkshire), Josh Davey (Somerset)
Out: Chris Wright (RET), Louis Kimber (Northamptonshire), Matt Salisbury (REL), Roman Walker (REL)
Middlesex
2025 overseas players: Kane Williamson (New Zealand), Josh Little (Ireland), Dane Paterson (South Africa)
In: Caleb Falconer, external (YTH)
Out: Stephen Ezkinazi (Leicestershire)
Northamptonshire
2025 overseas players: Matt Breetzke (South Africa), Yuzvendra Chahal (India), Harry Conway (Australia), Lloyd Pope (Australia), Tim Robinson (New Zealand)
Overseas players: Matt Breetzke (South Africa), Yuzvendra Chahal (India, second half of the season, for Championship and One-Day Cup), Harry Conway (Australia, for first two months of the season), Nathan McSweeney (Australia)
In: Louis Kimber (Leicestershire), Calvin Harrison (Nottinghamshire)
Out: Freddie Heldreich (REL)
Nottinghamshire
2025 overseas players: Kyle Verreynne (South Africa), Fergus O'Neill (Australia), Daniel Sams (Australia), Mohammad Abbas (Pakistan), Moises Henriques (Australia), Ishan Kishan (India)
Overseas players: Kyle Verreynne (South Africa, for Championship), Fergus O'Neill (Australia, from April-June)
In: Benny Howell (Hampshire, for T20)
Out: Matt Montgomery (Derbyshire), Sammy King, external (REL), Dane Schadendorf, external (REL), Calvin Harrison (Northamptonshire)
Somerset
2025 overseas players: Riley Meredith (Australia), Matt Henry (New Zealand), Migael Pretorius (South Africa)
Overseas players: Migael Pretorius (South Africa), Riley Meredith (Australia, for T20 Blast)
In: Josh Shaw (Gloucestershire)
Out: Kasey Aldridge (Durham), Sean Dickson (Glamorgan), Josh Davey (Leicestershire), Ben Green (Leicestershire), Andy Umeed, external (REL)
Surrey
2025 overseas players: Nathan Smith (New Zealand), Mitchell Santner (New Zealand), Kemar Roach (West Indies), Kurtis Patterson (Australia), Adam Zampa (Australia), Sai Kishore (India), Rahul Chahar (India)
In: None
Out: None
Sussex
2025 overseas players: Daniel Hughes (Australia), Jayden Seales (West Indies), Nathan McAndrew (Australia), Jaydev Unadkat (India), Gurinder Sandhu (Australia)
Overseas players: Jaydev Unadkat, external (India, for last eight Championship matches)
In: Danny Briggs (Warwickshire), Dom Goodman (Gloucestershire), Tom Price (Gloucestershire), Jack Leaning (Kent)
Out: Bertie Foreman, external (REL), Ari Karvelas, external (REL), Archie Lenham, external (REL), Zach Lion-Cachet, external (REL), Henry Rogers, external (REL)
Other news: Briggs has re-joined in a player-coach capacity.
Warwickshire
2025 overseas players: Tom Latham (New Zealand), Beau Webster (Australia), Hasan Ali (Pakistan), Vishwa Fernando (Sri Lanka), Corey Rocchiccioli (Australia), Will Young (New Zealand)
Overseas players: Beau Webster (Australia, for first half of season)
In: Jordan Thompson (Yorkshire), Nathan Gilchrist (Kent), Keith Barker (Hampshire)
Out: Moeen Ali (RET from county cricket), Danny Briggs (Sussex), Craig Miles (Gloucestershire)
Other news: Graeme Welch has re-joined the club to replace Stuart Barnes as bowling coach.
Worcestershire
2025 overseas players: Jacob Duffy (New Zealand), Ben Dwarshuis (Australia), Henry Nicholls (New Zealand), Khurram Shahzad (Pakistan)
Overseas players: Usama Mir (Pakistan), Ben Dwarshuis (Australia, for T20)
In: None
Out: Tom Hinley (REL), Yadvinder Singh (REL)
Other news: Former Worcestershire batter Alexei Kervezee has rejoined the club, external as second XI and assistant coach.
Yorkshire
2025 overseas players: Will Sutherland (Australia), Will O'Rourke (New Zealand), Jordan Buckingham (Australia), Ben Sears (New Zealand), Abdullah Shafique (Pakistan), Imam Ul-Haq (Pakistan), Mayank Agarwal (India)
In: None
Out: Jonny Tattersall (Leicestershire), Jordan Thompson (Warwickshire), Matt Milnes (Kent), Dawid Malan (Gloucestershire)
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