G&C 275 nov 25
GOOGLIES & CHINAMEN
An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 275
November 2025
Spot the Ball
Out and About with the Professor
This year’s County Championship was of considerable interest up to the last round of matches, and even up to the last day. I haven’t tried to check this, but I think it is, at the very least, unusual, for the title and the teams to be relegated still to be in contention at so late a stage. The title wasn’t settled until the second day of the final match, when Notts got the necessary batting point, but that still left two from a possible six to be relegated. So, I was happy to be at Headingley, when Durham just managed to lose their Division 1 status by a single point…almost deliberately.
When the match started, Yorkshire were one of the teams in the relegation group, but Hampshire’s loss to Surrey meant that they were safe, as well as giving Durham a decent chance of taking sufficient points from the game to secure their Division 1 position
That seemed unlikely when Durham were 7-2 in their first innings, but 101 from Ben Raine took them past 300 at the end of day one. Hopes for 350 and another batting point foundered when, the next morning, Jack White knocked out Potts’ middle stump and then, two balls later, Hogg’s off stump. On both occasions drinks were brought out, and indeed it was a sunny day – but we had only been playing for 17 mins.
I don’t think I’ve seen Raine get a big score before but he succeeded in forcing Yorkshire to post eight players on the fence when he was in the 90s – he settled the matter of his hundred by belting the ball over the head of one of them at deep square. Unfortunately for Durham, after Potts and Hogg, Raine was the last out at 346 – just short of another batting point.
A good second wicket stand between Lyth and Agarwal got the Yorkshire reply on its way and aggressive batting down the order from Hill and Thompson gave the home side a significant first innings advantage (as well, of course, as some batting points). It would be untrue to say that the travelling Durham supporters were hopeful of a win after the first innings but they did rather despair of ever bowling Yorkshire out. “All we need is ten wickets” said a voice from behind, “but I don’t think we can get ten wickets before Christmas”. In the event it wasn’t Christmas, but it was two days later. But now was Durham’s opportunity. All they had to do was bat out the game and the draw would get them home.
Jack White leaves the field with umpires Burns and O’Shaughnessy, having taken 5-69 in Durham’s first innings.
Cricket, as they say, is a funny old game. The first 20 wickets had put on over 820 runs. Durham’s next 10 wickets put on 85. The pitch didn’t appear to have changed – or not much – Bess bowled tidily and the impressive young George Hill got some movement, but 85 all out, when all that was needed was some careful batting? Very odd. At one time it seemed like a wicket was falling every ten minutes and indeed, seven wickets fell in the last ten overs. (Drinks every time, of course). Durham Head Coach, Ryan Campbell was quoted as saying that he put the “capitulation” down to a “too defensive mindset”. Umm…
One point of interest for England supporters was the bowling of Potts. Yorkshires latest overseas player Mayank Agarwal is a fine player but his last Test for India was some time ago (March 2022) and Potts had just been chosen for the Ashes squad to put fear and trembling into the Australian top order. At tea, Potts had bowled 18 overs for no wickets and 70+ runs with Agarwal belting his fastest deliveries all around Headingley…difficult to think that the Aussies will be too anxious.
This & That
The South Africans have brought much new blood into their test side in the top half of the order but have filled the tail with old stagers most of whom would consider themselves to be all-rounders. In a recent test against Pakistan Senuran Muthusamy batted at seven, Simon Harmer was at eight, Marco Jansen ignominiously at nine, Keshav Maharaj at ten and Kagiso Rabada at eleven. When the eighth wicket fell with the score at 235 Maharaj joined Muthusamy and they added 71 before Maharaj was dismissed for 30. Rabada then appeared as “Jack” and he struck 71 from 61 balls in adding 98 with Muthusamy who ended 89 not out. There were, no doubt, plenty of suggestions in the dressing room for appropriate batting order revisions…
The Abu Dhabi Tens has been going for several years now and has become one of the recognised franchise competitions in World cricket which is borne out by the top players now being available and selected for the eight teams.
“Nicholas Pooran will return to defending champions Deccan Gladiators in the Abu Dhabi T10 League, but there was no Jos Buttler among their direct signings. Pooran, 30, is the second-highest run-scorer in the tournament's history with 1,438 and captained Gladiators to the title in 2024. Buttler, 35, played in the tournament for the first time last year, and impressed with an average of 60.50. Pooran was joined by Australia all-rounder Marcus Stoinis, West Indies duo Andre Russell and Akeal Hosein, English batter Tom Kohler-Cadmore, Pakistan's Usman Tariq and United Arab Emirates' Ibrar Ahmad as Gladiator's direct signings. Kohler-Cadmore is the highest run-scorer in the tournament's history with 1,502. The eight-team tournament in the United Arab Emirates is due to take place between 18 and 30 November.”
In their South African provincial match, the Lions had reached 249 for 6 when Connor Esterhuizen was joined at the crease by Beyers Swanepoel. They added 330 for the seventh wicket before Esterhuizen was dismissed for 203. Swanepoel was on 169 not out when the declaration came at 619 for 7.
In the T20 series in New Zealand Tim Robinson scored an unbeaten 106 off 66 balls, including six fours and five sixes, to rescue New Zealand from a top-order collapse. However, chasing 182 proved a routine task for Australia, with captain Mitchell Marsh scoring 85 off 43 deliveries at the top of the order. The second match in this series was washed out but in the third Mitchell Marsh again dominated proceedings scoring 103 not out as his side won by three wickets with two overs to spare.
Former Australia Under-19 batsman Harjas Singh scored a remarkable 314 not out from 141 balls in the Sydney grade competition. The 20-year-old hit 35 sixes and 14 fours as his Western Suburbs side closed on 483-5 from 50 overs. His score is the third highest in Sydney first grade history - the level directly below professional state cricket - behind the legendary Victor Trumper's 335 in 1903 and Phil Jaques' 321 in 2007. Singh reached his century from 74 balls in the 35th over, but was only just getting started, making 214 from his next 67 deliveries. Singh was part of the Australia side which won the Under-19 World Cup in February 2024, top-scoring with 55 as they beat India, but is yet to secure a rookie contract with state side New South Wales.
In the Forest/Chelsea match when Chelsea were awarded a free kick on the edge of the penalty area, Forest created a wall with the customary prostrate player lying underneath it. Neto blasted his free kick under the wall but over the horizontal defender on its way into the net. It could become a feature of future defensive drills to establish how high the wall will jump so that enough horizontal players can be added on top of the prostrate guy to prevent a repeat.
Lions selections
“Rehan Ahmed, Jordan Cox and Sonny Baker have been named in an England Lions squad that will shadow the senior side on the tour of Australia. Leg-spinner Ahmed, 21, missed out on the main Ashes squad and instead joins a Lions group that will provide back-up and warm-up opposition for Ben Stokes' Test side. England's only warm-up match in Australia is against the Lions, a three-day match a week before the first Test in Perth. Ahmed is one of four players in the Lions squad that have won Test caps, alongside fellow spinner Tom Hartley and pace bowlers Matthew Fisher and Josh Hull. There is no place for Essex seamer Sam Cook, who made his Test debut against Zimbabwe in May.
Coached by Andrew Flintoff, the Lions squad also includes promising batting brothers from Somerset, James and Thomas Rew. Joining Baker and Hull in a youthful pace-bowling attack are Hampshire's Eddie Jack and Lancashire's Mitchell Stanley. Glamorgan pair Ben Kellaway and Asa Tribe are rewarded for their fine form with first call-ups. Kellaway is an ambidextrous spinner, while batsman Tribe has played international cricket for Jersey.
Following the game against the England senior side, the Lions play a Cricket Australia XI, a Prime Minister's XI and Australia A. Their tour ends on 8 December, the final day of the second Ashes Test in Brisbane.
Separately, Rehan Ahmed's younger brother Farhan has been named captain of an England Under-19s squad to tour the Caribbean in November. Flintoff's son Rocky, 17, has not been considered for either the Lions or Under-19s because of an unspecified injury.
England Lions squad to tour Australia: Rehan Ahmed, Sonny Baker, Jordan Cox, Matthew Fisher, Emilio Gay, Nathan Gilchrist, Tom Hartley, Tom Haines, Josh Hull, Eddie Jack, Ben Kellaway, Tom Lawes, Ben McKinney, Matthew Revis, James Rew, Thomas Rew, Mitchell Stanley, Asa Tribe.
England Under-19s squad to tour West Indies: Farhan Ahmed (captain), Ralphie Albert, Will Bennison, Ben Dawkins, Caleb Falconer, Jamie Feldman, Matthew Firbank, Alex French, Alex Green, Manny Lumsden, Ben Mayes, James Minto, Isaac Mohammad, Sebastian Morgan, Joe Moores, Jack Nelson, Charlie Taylor.”
Correspondence
George emailed me this:
I went to a very entertaining session yesterday at the Cheltenham literature festival.
Mike Atherton, Vic Marks and Richard Whitehead on ‘How to win the Ashes down Under’.
The conclusion seemed to be, 'go there when it’s a lesser Aussie team’.
They were agreed, though, that Bethel should bat at three in place of Pope.
Also, stick with Bashir. But they can’t really be thinking of playing Jacks as the front-line spinner, can they?
I replied:
I don’t understand Jacks’ selection at all, other than he fits into their criteria of tall men which of course also explains Crawley’s continued inclusion. If Jacks plays as the spinner he will need to bowl about twenty overs a day. He exclusively plays white ball stuff and will have no experience of this.
They will go into the series underprepared (no match practice) and probably not be match ready until the second or third test when it may well be too late.
He replied:
Agreed.
And if they do go with Bethel, I hope he looks a little better than the rabbit in the headlights that cost us the series v India.
Though I think the Aussies will be relishing Crawley and Pope.
The panel thought England would win 3-2, but they were talking to Brits.
I’ll be surprised to say the least if England win more than one test.
I replied:
I find that I still get strangely elated about a Middlesex win but generally would prefer the England team to lose. The inappropriate euphoria that attaches to national team wins (football and cricket) is out of all proportion to the achievement and is better avoided.
However, it seems that the structure has now completely changed and that talent is spotted and kept nationally. These guys are nurtured centrally and have little exposure to any form of county cricket. County cricket instead of being the breeding ground has now become separate and an irrelevance to national cricket. Bethell played almost no cricket this season but is selected for the Aussie tour. Hameed scored 1200 runs and led his side to the county championship and, I suspect, wasn’t even considered. The list of tall fast bowlers selected for England who no one has heard of grows and most of them would not get into their county sides if available.
Botham Matters
George sent me this article by Elizabeth Ammon which suggests that ITB has been an avid Googlies reader
England’s Ashes preparations used to involve playing several warm-up games against state sides and prime minister’s select XIs, with at least two or three first-class matches before the first Test. But this time England will play only one three-day warm-up against the England Lions, their development squad, at Lilac Hill the week before the first Test, which Botham believes is not enough.
Speaking on the first episode of Old Boys, New Balls, the new podcast he is hosting with the England rugby union great Sir Bill Beaumont, Botham said: “I’m worried. We’re going to wander in and have a little game with the ‘A’ team.
“[It will be] ‘Alright mate, how are you? Good on ya’ and we’re going to go and perform? Not one [state match] which borders on arrogance. You’ve got to give yourself the chance. They are saying we play too much cricket … I don’t think you play enough.
“The conditions are different when you play cricket in Australia: the sun, the heat, the bounce, the crowd, the Aussie players, you’ve got to get used to all that. You’re not playing against the Australian cricket team, you’re playing against Australia — 24.5 million people.”
Botham is particularly concerned about the condition of the bowling attack, suggesting a cautious approach to workload management can be counterproductive. The paceman Mark Wood has not bowled since having knee surgery before the start of the English summer and Ben Stokes, the captain and all-rounder, has not played since suffering a bicep injury in the fourth Test against India in July.
“Bowlers don’t get fit in gyms, that’s been proven,” Botham said. “Look at the record with injuries — Wood, Jofra Archer, Ben Stokes, Brydon Carse … they don’t play enough. You get fit by playing. If it goes horribly wrong, Mark Wood breaks down in the first game, or Jofra Archer does, or Ben can’t bowl, we are suddenly chasing the eight-ball before we’ve started. It’s a worry.”
Stokes and Wood have concerning recent injury records but Carse, their county team-mate at Durham, insisted both will be fit for the Ashes. “I’ve been down to Loughborough in the past couple of weeks, had a couple of nights with them. Ben is looking near enough 100 per cent fit and so is Mark. I’ve been bowling with them,” said Carse, who was speaking at the Professional Cricketers’ Association awards last week. “It’s exciting to see where they have got to after their setbacks during the summer. They will be raring to go come Australia time.”
Thompson Matters
Steve updates on the state of play at his local
‘It’s good to be back,’ I said as we turned the corner to see the familiar faded grandeur of the Bat and Ball Inn; its pub sign swinging lop-sidedly in time-old fashion from its one remaining chain.
‘Do you think he’ll fix that sign now he’s out?’ asked Brian.
‘I guess it depends on how grand the Grand Re-opening is.’ replied Sachin.
‘He’s lucky they allowed him to keep his licence.’ said Brian.’ That new bloke on the Council who comes in for last orders on a Wednesday probably signed it off.’
‘Mike, spot-fixing, eh’, said Brian, ‘who’d have thought it?’
‘He still can’t see the irony that it was a Chinese bloke who did for him,’ I said.
‘Yes, a Chinaman,’ chuckled Sachin, ’after a ‘chance’ encounter at the local take-away.’
‘I don’t get it,’ said Virat.
‘Or that he was convicted of aiding and abetting,’ said Brian. More laughter.
‘I don’t get it,’ said Virat.
‘Or that the bloke’s surname was Ton,’ I said.
All eyes on Virat.
Nothing.
Mike’s malfeasance had made the national press. The red tops had a field day.
The Daily Star went with, ‘CRICKET BETTING SCANDAL: BAIL FOR CHINAMAN TON.’
One anonymous member of the Bat and Ball’s Quiz Champions, One Ball Left, was quoted as saying, ‘We always knew the landlord was a ‘wrong-un and now we have to go to the local offie.’
‘Fancy asking a bloke to bowl a no ball in the 20th over,’ said Brian.
‘What’s wrong with that?’ asked Virat.
‘It was a Welsh Fire match, Virat!’ said Sachin. ‘I mean, a hundred quid at 10/1 on a no ball....in the twentieth over.... of a Welsh Fire match!’
‘Isn’t the whole point of spot-fixing that the bookie is involved?’ asked Brian.
‘Yes!’ I said, ‘but even he realised how ridiculous it all was and informed the local police.’
‘To be fair, they were unlucky the judge turned out to be an MCC member,’ said Brian, ‘old school, and with a sense of humour.’
‘Sixteen months and four days for Ton and a Hundred days for Mike,’ said Sachin. and then he said, ‘‘You have brought our national game into disrepute.”’
‘Yes, cricket suffered,’ said Virat sagely.
‘No, don’t be stupid Virat,’ said Sachin, ‘it’s the Hundred - he meant betting!’
‘To be fair your mum was great though Virat,’ said Brian, ‘visiting Mike every week with a plateful of her bhajis and pakoras.’
‘That was until someone spiked them one week with several Scotch Bonnets’ I said.
‘How long was Mike in hospital for Virat?’.
‘Poor Virat’s mum, she’d been in line for Visitor of the Year until then,’ observed Brian.
The Grand re-opening was due to have been the previous week with a ‘welcome back’ speech by Gerald, Mike’s best mate and the new local councillor, but it was postponed because Bill, one of the regulars, ordered fifty national flags for the occasion only to be told by an infuriated Mike that he’d bought Danish flags.
Virat’s mum came up with a typically appropriate menu for the Grand re-opening:
Starter
TRENT ROCKETS
Spiced Staffordshire oatcakes with a hot chilli jam
*
Mains
WELSH FIRE
Vindaloo leek curry
or
Lamb JAILfrezi
NORTHERN SUPERCHARGERS
Cumberland sausages in a Scotch Bonnet sauce
*
Dessert
LONDON SPIRIT
Porridge kulfi
One hundred hour soaked oats in Bombay Sapphire Gin
Virat delightedly let it be known that he’d had a hand in every course.
‘Anyone for a Chinese?’ I said.
As we left, the sound of chinking beer glasses and the strains of Rule Britannia echoed from the pub and into the darkening night.
Puzzling Aspects of the Premier League
Does anyone have the explanation for these strange events?
Googlies Website
All the back editions of Googlies can be found on the G&C website. There are also many photographs most of which have never appeared in Googlies.
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Googlies and Chinamen
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An Occasional Cricketing Journal
Edition 275
November 2025
Spot the Ball
Out and About with the Professor
This year’s County Championship was of considerable interest up to the last round of matches, and even up to the last day. I haven’t tried to check this, but I think it is, at the very least, unusual, for the title and the teams to be relegated still to be in contention at so late a stage. The title wasn’t settled until the second day of the final match, when Notts got the necessary batting point, but that still left two from a possible six to be relegated. So, I was happy to be at Headingley, when Durham just managed to lose their Division 1 status by a single point…almost deliberately.
When the match started, Yorkshire were one of the teams in the relegation group, but Hampshire’s loss to Surrey meant that they were safe, as well as giving Durham a decent chance of taking sufficient points from the game to secure their Division 1 position
That seemed unlikely when Durham were 7-2 in their first innings, but 101 from Ben Raine took them past 300 at the end of day one. Hopes for 350 and another batting point foundered when, the next morning, Jack White knocked out Potts’ middle stump and then, two balls later, Hogg’s off stump. On both occasions drinks were brought out, and indeed it was a sunny day – but we had only been playing for 17 mins.
I don’t think I’ve seen Raine get a big score before but he succeeded in forcing Yorkshire to post eight players on the fence when he was in the 90s – he settled the matter of his hundred by belting the ball over the head of one of them at deep square. Unfortunately for Durham, after Potts and Hogg, Raine was the last out at 346 – just short of another batting point.
A good second wicket stand between Lyth and Agarwal got the Yorkshire reply on its way and aggressive batting down the order from Hill and Thompson gave the home side a significant first innings advantage (as well, of course, as some batting points). It would be untrue to say that the travelling Durham supporters were hopeful of a win after the first innings but they did rather despair of ever bowling Yorkshire out. “All we need is ten wickets” said a voice from behind, “but I don’t think we can get ten wickets before Christmas”. In the event it wasn’t Christmas, but it was two days later. But now was Durham’s opportunity. All they had to do was bat out the game and the draw would get them home.
Jack White leaves the field with umpires Burns and O’Shaughnessy, having taken 5-69 in Durham’s first innings.
Cricket, as they say, is a funny old game. The first 20 wickets had put on over 820 runs. Durham’s next 10 wickets put on 85. The pitch didn’t appear to have changed – or not much – Bess bowled tidily and the impressive young George Hill got some movement, but 85 all out, when all that was needed was some careful batting? Very odd. At one time it seemed like a wicket was falling every ten minutes and indeed, seven wickets fell in the last ten overs. (Drinks every time, of course). Durham Head Coach, Ryan Campbell was quoted as saying that he put the “capitulation” down to a “too defensive mindset”. Umm…
One point of interest for England supporters was the bowling of Potts. Yorkshires latest overseas player Mayank Agarwal is a fine player but his last Test for India was some time ago (March 2022) and Potts had just been chosen for the Ashes squad to put fear and trembling into the Australian top order. At tea, Potts had bowled 18 overs for no wickets and 70+ runs with Agarwal belting his fastest deliveries all around Headingley…difficult to think that the Aussies will be too anxious.
This & That
The South Africans have brought much new blood into their test side in the top half of the order but have filled the tail with old stagers most of whom would consider themselves to be all-rounders. In a recent test against Pakistan Senuran Muthusamy batted at seven, Simon Harmer was at eight, Marco Jansen ignominiously at nine, Keshav Maharaj at ten and Kagiso Rabada at eleven. When the eighth wicket fell with the score at 235 Maharaj joined Muthusamy and they added 71 before Maharaj was dismissed for 30. Rabada then appeared as “Jack” and he struck 71 from 61 balls in adding 98 with Muthusamy who ended 89 not out. There were, no doubt, plenty of suggestions in the dressing room for appropriate batting order revisions…
The Abu Dhabi Tens has been going for several years now and has become one of the recognised franchise competitions in World cricket which is borne out by the top players now being available and selected for the eight teams.
“Nicholas Pooran will return to defending champions Deccan Gladiators in the Abu Dhabi T10 League, but there was no Jos Buttler among their direct signings. Pooran, 30, is the second-highest run-scorer in the tournament's history with 1,438 and captained Gladiators to the title in 2024. Buttler, 35, played in the tournament for the first time last year, and impressed with an average of 60.50. Pooran was joined by Australia all-rounder Marcus Stoinis, West Indies duo Andre Russell and Akeal Hosein, English batter Tom Kohler-Cadmore, Pakistan's Usman Tariq and United Arab Emirates' Ibrar Ahmad as Gladiator's direct signings. Kohler-Cadmore is the highest run-scorer in the tournament's history with 1,502. The eight-team tournament in the United Arab Emirates is due to take place between 18 and 30 November.”
In their South African provincial match, the Lions had reached 249 for 6 when Connor Esterhuizen was joined at the crease by Beyers Swanepoel. They added 330 for the seventh wicket before Esterhuizen was dismissed for 203. Swanepoel was on 169 not out when the declaration came at 619 for 7.
In the T20 series in New Zealand Tim Robinson scored an unbeaten 106 off 66 balls, including six fours and five sixes, to rescue New Zealand from a top-order collapse. However, chasing 182 proved a routine task for Australia, with captain Mitchell Marsh scoring 85 off 43 deliveries at the top of the order. The second match in this series was washed out but in the third Mitchell Marsh again dominated proceedings scoring 103 not out as his side won by three wickets with two overs to spare.
Former Australia Under-19 batsman Harjas Singh scored a remarkable 314 not out from 141 balls in the Sydney grade competition. The 20-year-old hit 35 sixes and 14 fours as his Western Suburbs side closed on 483-5 from 50 overs. His score is the third highest in Sydney first grade history - the level directly below professional state cricket - behind the legendary Victor Trumper's 335 in 1903 and Phil Jaques' 321 in 2007. Singh reached his century from 74 balls in the 35th over, but was only just getting started, making 214 from his next 67 deliveries. Singh was part of the Australia side which won the Under-19 World Cup in February 2024, top-scoring with 55 as they beat India, but is yet to secure a rookie contract with state side New South Wales.
In the Forest/Chelsea match when Chelsea were awarded a free kick on the edge of the penalty area, Forest created a wall with the customary prostrate player lying underneath it. Neto blasted his free kick under the wall but over the horizontal defender on its way into the net. It could become a feature of future defensive drills to establish how high the wall will jump so that enough horizontal players can be added on top of the prostrate guy to prevent a repeat.
Lions selections
“Rehan Ahmed, Jordan Cox and Sonny Baker have been named in an England Lions squad that will shadow the senior side on the tour of Australia. Leg-spinner Ahmed, 21, missed out on the main Ashes squad and instead joins a Lions group that will provide back-up and warm-up opposition for Ben Stokes' Test side. England's only warm-up match in Australia is against the Lions, a three-day match a week before the first Test in Perth. Ahmed is one of four players in the Lions squad that have won Test caps, alongside fellow spinner Tom Hartley and pace bowlers Matthew Fisher and Josh Hull. There is no place for Essex seamer Sam Cook, who made his Test debut against Zimbabwe in May.
Coached by Andrew Flintoff, the Lions squad also includes promising batting brothers from Somerset, James and Thomas Rew. Joining Baker and Hull in a youthful pace-bowling attack are Hampshire's Eddie Jack and Lancashire's Mitchell Stanley. Glamorgan pair Ben Kellaway and Asa Tribe are rewarded for their fine form with first call-ups. Kellaway is an ambidextrous spinner, while batsman Tribe has played international cricket for Jersey.
Following the game against the England senior side, the Lions play a Cricket Australia XI, a Prime Minister's XI and Australia A. Their tour ends on 8 December, the final day of the second Ashes Test in Brisbane.
Separately, Rehan Ahmed's younger brother Farhan has been named captain of an England Under-19s squad to tour the Caribbean in November. Flintoff's son Rocky, 17, has not been considered for either the Lions or Under-19s because of an unspecified injury.
England Lions squad to tour Australia: Rehan Ahmed, Sonny Baker, Jordan Cox, Matthew Fisher, Emilio Gay, Nathan Gilchrist, Tom Hartley, Tom Haines, Josh Hull, Eddie Jack, Ben Kellaway, Tom Lawes, Ben McKinney, Matthew Revis, James Rew, Thomas Rew, Mitchell Stanley, Asa Tribe.
England Under-19s squad to tour West Indies: Farhan Ahmed (captain), Ralphie Albert, Will Bennison, Ben Dawkins, Caleb Falconer, Jamie Feldman, Matthew Firbank, Alex French, Alex Green, Manny Lumsden, Ben Mayes, James Minto, Isaac Mohammad, Sebastian Morgan, Joe Moores, Jack Nelson, Charlie Taylor.”
Correspondence
George emailed me this:
I went to a very entertaining session yesterday at the Cheltenham literature festival.
Mike Atherton, Vic Marks and Richard Whitehead on ‘How to win the Ashes down Under’.
The conclusion seemed to be, 'go there when it’s a lesser Aussie team’.
They were agreed, though, that Bethel should bat at three in place of Pope.
Also, stick with Bashir. But they can’t really be thinking of playing Jacks as the front-line spinner, can they?
I replied:
I don’t understand Jacks’ selection at all, other than he fits into their criteria of tall men which of course also explains Crawley’s continued inclusion. If Jacks plays as the spinner he will need to bowl about twenty overs a day. He exclusively plays white ball stuff and will have no experience of this.
They will go into the series underprepared (no match practice) and probably not be match ready until the second or third test when it may well be too late.
He replied:
Agreed.
And if they do go with Bethel, I hope he looks a little better than the rabbit in the headlights that cost us the series v India.
Though I think the Aussies will be relishing Crawley and Pope.
The panel thought England would win 3-2, but they were talking to Brits.
I’ll be surprised to say the least if England win more than one test.
I replied:
I find that I still get strangely elated about a Middlesex win but generally would prefer the England team to lose. The inappropriate euphoria that attaches to national team wins (football and cricket) is out of all proportion to the achievement and is better avoided.
However, it seems that the structure has now completely changed and that talent is spotted and kept nationally. These guys are nurtured centrally and have little exposure to any form of county cricket. County cricket instead of being the breeding ground has now become separate and an irrelevance to national cricket. Bethell played almost no cricket this season but is selected for the Aussie tour. Hameed scored 1200 runs and led his side to the county championship and, I suspect, wasn’t even considered. The list of tall fast bowlers selected for England who no one has heard of grows and most of them would not get into their county sides if available.
Botham Matters
George sent me this article by Elizabeth Ammon which suggests that ITB has been an avid Googlies reader
England’s Ashes preparations used to involve playing several warm-up games against state sides and prime minister’s select XIs, with at least two or three first-class matches before the first Test. But this time England will play only one three-day warm-up against the England Lions, their development squad, at Lilac Hill the week before the first Test, which Botham believes is not enough.
Speaking on the first episode of Old Boys, New Balls, the new podcast he is hosting with the England rugby union great Sir Bill Beaumont, Botham said: “I’m worried. We’re going to wander in and have a little game with the ‘A’ team.
“[It will be] ‘Alright mate, how are you? Good on ya’ and we’re going to go and perform? Not one [state match] which borders on arrogance. You’ve got to give yourself the chance. They are saying we play too much cricket … I don’t think you play enough.
“The conditions are different when you play cricket in Australia: the sun, the heat, the bounce, the crowd, the Aussie players, you’ve got to get used to all that. You’re not playing against the Australian cricket team, you’re playing against Australia — 24.5 million people.”
Botham is particularly concerned about the condition of the bowling attack, suggesting a cautious approach to workload management can be counterproductive. The paceman Mark Wood has not bowled since having knee surgery before the start of the English summer and Ben Stokes, the captain and all-rounder, has not played since suffering a bicep injury in the fourth Test against India in July.
“Bowlers don’t get fit in gyms, that’s been proven,” Botham said. “Look at the record with injuries — Wood, Jofra Archer, Ben Stokes, Brydon Carse … they don’t play enough. You get fit by playing. If it goes horribly wrong, Mark Wood breaks down in the first game, or Jofra Archer does, or Ben can’t bowl, we are suddenly chasing the eight-ball before we’ve started. It’s a worry.”
Stokes and Wood have concerning recent injury records but Carse, their county team-mate at Durham, insisted both will be fit for the Ashes. “I’ve been down to Loughborough in the past couple of weeks, had a couple of nights with them. Ben is looking near enough 100 per cent fit and so is Mark. I’ve been bowling with them,” said Carse, who was speaking at the Professional Cricketers’ Association awards last week. “It’s exciting to see where they have got to after their setbacks during the summer. They will be raring to go come Australia time.”
Thompson Matters
Steve updates on the state of play at his local
‘It’s good to be back,’ I said as we turned the corner to see the familiar faded grandeur of the Bat and Ball Inn; its pub sign swinging lop-sidedly in time-old fashion from its one remaining chain.
‘Do you think he’ll fix that sign now he’s out?’ asked Brian.
‘I guess it depends on how grand the Grand Re-opening is.’ replied Sachin.
‘He’s lucky they allowed him to keep his licence.’ said Brian.’ That new bloke on the Council who comes in for last orders on a Wednesday probably signed it off.’
‘Mike, spot-fixing, eh’, said Brian, ‘who’d have thought it?’
‘He still can’t see the irony that it was a Chinese bloke who did for him,’ I said.
‘Yes, a Chinaman,’ chuckled Sachin, ’after a ‘chance’ encounter at the local take-away.’
‘I don’t get it,’ said Virat.
‘Or that he was convicted of aiding and abetting,’ said Brian. More laughter.
‘I don’t get it,’ said Virat.
‘Or that the bloke’s surname was Ton,’ I said.
All eyes on Virat.
Nothing.
Mike’s malfeasance had made the national press. The red tops had a field day.
The Daily Star went with, ‘CRICKET BETTING SCANDAL: BAIL FOR CHINAMAN TON.’
One anonymous member of the Bat and Ball’s Quiz Champions, One Ball Left, was quoted as saying, ‘We always knew the landlord was a ‘wrong-un and now we have to go to the local offie.’
‘Fancy asking a bloke to bowl a no ball in the 20th over,’ said Brian.
‘What’s wrong with that?’ asked Virat.
‘It was a Welsh Fire match, Virat!’ said Sachin. ‘I mean, a hundred quid at 10/1 on a no ball....in the twentieth over.... of a Welsh Fire match!’
‘Isn’t the whole point of spot-fixing that the bookie is involved?’ asked Brian.
‘Yes!’ I said, ‘but even he realised how ridiculous it all was and informed the local police.’
‘To be fair, they were unlucky the judge turned out to be an MCC member,’ said Brian, ‘old school, and with a sense of humour.’
‘Sixteen months and four days for Ton and a Hundred days for Mike,’ said Sachin. and then he said, ‘‘You have brought our national game into disrepute.”’
‘Yes, cricket suffered,’ said Virat sagely.
‘No, don’t be stupid Virat,’ said Sachin, ‘it’s the Hundred - he meant betting!’
‘To be fair your mum was great though Virat,’ said Brian, ‘visiting Mike every week with a plateful of her bhajis and pakoras.’
‘That was until someone spiked them one week with several Scotch Bonnets’ I said.
‘How long was Mike in hospital for Virat?’.
‘Poor Virat’s mum, she’d been in line for Visitor of the Year until then,’ observed Brian.
The Grand re-opening was due to have been the previous week with a ‘welcome back’ speech by Gerald, Mike’s best mate and the new local councillor, but it was postponed because Bill, one of the regulars, ordered fifty national flags for the occasion only to be told by an infuriated Mike that he’d bought Danish flags.
Virat’s mum came up with a typically appropriate menu for the Grand re-opening:
Starter
TRENT ROCKETS
Spiced Staffordshire oatcakes with a hot chilli jam
*
Mains
WELSH FIRE
Vindaloo leek curry
or
Lamb JAILfrezi
NORTHERN SUPERCHARGERS
Cumberland sausages in a Scotch Bonnet sauce
*
Dessert
LONDON SPIRIT
Porridge kulfi
One hundred hour soaked oats in Bombay Sapphire Gin
Virat delightedly let it be known that he’d had a hand in every course.
‘Anyone for a Chinese?’ I said.
As we left, the sound of chinking beer glasses and the strains of Rule Britannia echoed from the pub and into the darkening night.
Puzzling Aspects of the Premier League
Does anyone have the explanation for these strange events?
- Why are most players wearing orange boots this season?
- Why do 6’ 4” defenders roll up one trouser leg to the groin at corners?
- Why is it critical that the linesman gets involved in corners on one side of the pitch but on the other the players can take them unaided? If their role is so important why doesn’t one of them make the effort to attend the unattended corner? If it is not important why don’t the attending linesmen keep out of it altogether?
- When a player gets clattered by an opponent and after receiving attention has to leave the playing area why is the offending culprit not made to join him?
- Why is no one surprised that there are so many goals scored in extra time? Firstly, the game is much longer than it used to be as these minutes didn’t previously get added, and players tire during this extra time. Secondly, the game is now sixteen a side and as substitutions are made the manager’s first choice format is broken up and weakness’ in defences are opened up.
- For many years the ball had to be played forward at the kick off and so the centre forward would tap it so that one of the inside forwards could then make a pass. Now only one is required as the ball is frequently hoofed back to the goalkeeper. Was there a law change to permit this?
Googlies Website
All the back editions of Googlies can be found on the G&C website. There are also many photographs most of which have never appeared in Googlies.
www.googliesandchinamen.com
Googlies and Chinamen
is produced by
James Sharp
Broad Lee House
Combs
High Peak
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